the transsexual walter benjamin🪬
@dmt4dmt
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i am 81 and a gay homosexual f @ggot . devout maximalist and freak!!!!! person of jihad experience
he/they
Joined February 2022
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Last Seen Profiles
Pinned Tweet
fetishizing gay men is sooo fun i love it
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saw this framed picture of ryan gosling as ken at the pharmacy. wasn’t even associated with anything barbie branded that was being sold, it was just there
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b4 moving into my appt i asked my landlord “is the water running like do the toilet & shower work?”, he says (in his heavy quebecois accent) “yes. there is a funny toilet seat”, me: “what do u mean by..funny?”, landlord: “no you have to see. i know you will like it”
this was it
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too late. i have already depicted myself as the cabbage grown in excreta-based compost (left) and you as the cabbage grown without soil amendements (right)
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[charli xcx but she’s dracula] do you vant to guess the color of my underveaar! bleh!🧛♂️
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i cannot be fucking stopped w these korean marinated eggs they’re so fucking good and easy
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must point out: during this phone convo i was accidentally high on acid and then i spent the next week anxious about what a “funny toilet seat” could mean to a weird hermit elderly quebecois landlord
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same convo: he had been my friends landlord so i had spent a lot of time in the building so i asked him which appt it was. he said “it’s number 8 like the beatles song! *proceeds to sing this song for a full half min*”
a) the “beatles song” is
#9
b) my appt # is not 8 or 9
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Jolene you have to stop. you smoke too tough. your beauty is beyond compare. your smile is like a breath of spring. they can’t compete with you
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THERAPIST: it’s okay. jason alexander as a serial killer dressed like colonel sanders for some reason on the show “criminal minds” can’t hurt you
JASON ALEXANDER, as a serial killer dressed like colonel sanders for some reason on the show “criminal minds”:
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these are the main companies palestinians have called a boycott on:
- hp (hewlett-packard)
- sodastream
- puma
- ahava cosmetics
- sabra hummus
- any produce imported from isr*el
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dude Are you seriously california Dreamin’ right now… on such a winter’s day?🤣🤣
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since so many of u think this makes him a cool landlord i shld point out: there is no such thing also he refuses 2 giv me a lease, he is homophobic, deposits several months of rent chèques at the same time w no warning, knocks on my appt door once then just tries 2 open the door
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@lake_scum
yeah i still have it!!! i want to display it on my wall but all my google searches of “how to display toilet seat on wall” have come up unsuccessful
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bro are you okay? youre only RTing the depressing ones from the disco elysium quotes bot and not the communist ones too
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if u would like 2 help me w rent so he doesn’t just knock once then break into my appt in order to ask for it in person, the link is in my bio❤️🔥
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re ppl calling out “afab only roommates” housing posts: imo the response of “butbut what if someone has Trauama with Specific Bodies” just tells me you have a lot of internalized transphobia and bio-essentialism to work thru if u only see ppl as their “Bodies” re agab
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i made a bdsm dungeon in animal crossing. it has a kill corner, a watersports/boarding area and a medfet space
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mommy issues are so stupid, man. i got a package in animal crossing from “mom” and i almost kiIIed myself
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i got top surgery over a year ago and i constantly think about this reply i got from some random person when i posted my fundraiser on here like i read it aloud to myself and it gives me an asthma attack
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does anyone have any useful sentences that will change my life immediately upon being read?
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the “women and children” narrative has served to demonize muslim/brown men in paIestine, syria, iraq, afghanistan etc bc the implication is that every one of our men is a potential insurgent, is a justifiable target for imperial fire
So tired of the womenandchildren only frameworks. I love Palestinian men too. They’re our dads and brothers and uncles and grandpas and friends. They deserve love too. They deserve to be mourned.
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MY STUDENTS, emailing me: Hello, I was wondering if I could please get a day’s extension on this assignment; no problem if not, I completely understand. Signed, [full name and student ID number]
ME, stoned off my ass emailing back: yeah no problem hav an extra week if you like
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@olliehastweets
absolutely it was. i spent about three months carefully using this toilet seat that was not in any way attached to the toilet because my landlord is very bad at doing tasks and it took him months to replace it w a working one
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btw the quebec provincial weed store sells THC infused poutine sauce mix
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sexual daffy duck is like: i’ve been a nathty girl
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my OCD about me, to me: hes sart of like an evil porson
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vanya tells me they’re going to send me a hot video. five seconds later i receive this
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this is how i answer the phone when the pharmacy tells me my testosterone is ready for pickup
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its so cool that they have a huge permanent mural dedicated to anthony bourdain in downtown montreal
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in the movie “beavis & butthead do america”, theres a song called “lesbian seagull” which, as it turns out, is a REAL SONG written in 1979 after a scientific study showed long-term, monogamous lesbianism in seagulls
here is “Lesbian Seagull” by Engelbert Humperdinck
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THERAPIST: it’s okay. you’re safe here. quebecois boomhauer cannot hurt you
QUEBECOIS BOOMHAUER:
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came across an ig video from some acct that explores abandoned buildings posting like “urban explorers worst fears”, and someone had commented this which like. that’s actually p believable, what’s his @ please??????
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family doc neglected to mention that the doctor she referred me to in her clinic to talk about IUD insertion was a large and very hot gay man. this was me when he said “okay, so what are your ultimate gender goals?”
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bff spotted this poster in london, ontario
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ok how about this: TWINK peaks. is that anything
⚠️While this user is not directly responsible, they have a rare form of OCD wherein their compulsions genuinely do stave off real-world disasters and, as a result, they inadvertently caused the Chicago Tylenol Murders.
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this one. this is the absolute ultimate best one
What’s the funniest joke in the history of television? Has to be a single joke/gag don’t come here detailing entire episodes and story arcs. “Dead dove do not eat” type of stuff.
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i am everyone i have ever been and that is okay with me
everyone i’ve met who got a sexuality label tattooed later changed said label. to keep in mind!
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i thought testosterone would give me a happy trail but it gave me a whole fucking field 🧿❤️🔥
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my brain when two people are talking to me at once
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MY FATHER, trying to hurt my feelings: you look like a freak, it’s like you’ve lost all semblance of femininity
OTHER TRANSSEXUALS, successfully hitting on me: you look like a freak,🥵🥵🥵🥵 it’s like you’ve lost all semblance of femininity👨❤️👨🫃
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Lisa is by far the most likely Simpson to march for palestine wtf are these results
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nyt cooking and others similar are always like. you HAVE to try this miso gochujang tahini orange blossom white beanie weenie hot honey potato chip crunch lemon feta gochujang blackened butter-matcha skillet snack-cake cookie or we will fucking kiII you in public
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recipe
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save me bdsm integrated into my daily life. save me
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you come into my house, on the day my transgender is to be visible,
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it must have been fucking crazy sucking and fucking in these things
we need to bring back 1970s conversation pits
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do i….actually believe….that it’s okay….to ask someone for their consent to do something sexual with them? yes i do believe it is okay to ask someone 4 their consent to do something sexual with them hope that clears things up
@dmt4dmt
Do you actually believe it’s okay to ask that of a gender marginalized person who isn’t into it? I haven’t seen many piss drinkers who were shy about having “weird kinks”. I agree about the stuff you didn’t address being a lot, but like that’s rude and offensive kinda objectively
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he’s hot but we don’t want to see abs in these ad campaigns anymore. show us ass cheeks, holes and/or balls
Jeremy Allen White is iconic in Calvin Klein Underwear. designed in New York City.
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i dreamt that rihanna released a new song and it started off with her saying “fuck 9/11!”
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i think i Hauve a toothache
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the iphone featured photos widget loves to be like “here’s a picture of ur ex btw!” when ur just trying to check the weather. it’s like a flash grenade
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cannot explain the emotions i feel: ub*r driver was falasteeni, immediately gendered me correctly even tho my name isnt a traditionally masculine name in arabic n i tend 2 gender myself feminine in arabic bc im used 2 doing it w family. we talked abt home + family the whole time
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“binary trans people” is really such a brain worm please explain to me how being transsexual in Any way is re-enforcing a gender essentialist binary please
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[guy w ocd who started rewatching house this week voice] be honest guys. do you think i have lupus but i just never noticed i had it for years
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HERE IT IS . WHY DOES SHE SHRIEK LIKE THAT
been a lot of great bird dogging videos from the past few months but the one that pops up in my head often is the one where someone in an audience says the name of the woman who’s being interviewed on stage (in a normal voice) and as soon as they say her name, the woman SCREAMS
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jean jacket❤️
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i love remembering that this comment that has become a reaction image was a comment originally left on a deviantart adult baby/giantess fetish image. happy mother’s day to deviantart user BigJB21
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THE SIGNS AS WEIRD THINGS MY LANDLORD HAS DONE/DOES:
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“I can’t in good conscience” like he is taking a moral stand. he’s had enough.
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in the clown car straight up ‘honking it ‘. and by ‘it’ haha well. lets justr say. My nodse
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if he’s your man then why is he picking bugs out of my fur and eating them
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this post from britney spears…….she’s literally a prophet
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i know that “theyfab” isn’t a slur bc it wouldn’t turn me on if a cruel and sadistic woman said it to me
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“alcohol free queer space to make friends” akhi, the mosque
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IM ON ACID DID SOMEONE RELLY TRY TO ASSASSINATE DINALD TRUMP LMFAO??
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whenever someone on here gets weird abt dyke4fag desire, i think of samuel delany’s autobiography “the motion of light in water” where he writes, beautifully, abt being a gay black man in an open marriage w marilyn hacker, a white jewish woman who later wld come out as a lesbian
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looking for a man (trans masc / trans man)
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i do not need cognitive behavioral therapy. i need someone to smack me on the snout with a rolled up newspaper every time i start to pick at my skin
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@hologramvin
Hello my friend,
It appears i cannot read this tweet in it’s entirety. Would you be kind enough to clarify the last four words to me?
Thank you,
The Transsexual Walter Benjamin
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lmao so many losers replying to this telling me to get a job - bitch, where exactly did you see me say i didn’t have one? besides. only job i’m interested in is a blowjob sooooo
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i’m so obsessed with the phrase “my femme presenting ass” that’s not me at all but i’m still going to b saying this forever
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the truth is chickens are always serving cunt. they’re fucking strutting around in their little farms, in the greenery, looking sooo genuinely snatched.
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why is nobody talking about the fact that i’m never gonna dance again? and like obviously, that has a lot to do with guilty feet having no rhythm……and like. lets just be real: im never gonna dance again, the way i danced with you, oh!!!!
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transmascs when they get their first button up
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he/they pronouns, is in a polycule, has a somatic therapist and a job in the non-profit sector. everyone just regurgitates random affirmations at him/them whenever he tries to confess he’s a serial murderer
Lionsgate is looking to do a modern remake of ‘AMERICAN PSYCHO’.
(Source: )
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FBI AGENT, trying to ‘good cop’ me during the interrogation: now that its just us squirrel friends,
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faIasteen will be free. faIasteen will be free
There’s a trend on TikTok of Palestinians in Gaza returning and repairing their destroyed homes to demonstrate their resilience despite the war. The caption says “we will not go”:
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they’ll email me like “my house burned down and i was incorrectly charged with murder but now i’m out, will you still take this essay if it’s one minute past midnight and i provide a signed note or will you fail me and kick me out of university?”
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