I refuse to learn my mom's birthday.

not just xander bettors are happy this morning

Putin’s real mom absolutely seething right now.

What. Are. The. Horses’. Names.

"17 Celebrities You Never Knew Were..." trust me bitch I knew.

My god she's good.

funny how the vet who banned my cat for life for life for “being vicious” and “trying to murder her” somehow forgot to ban me for life from her mailing list.

RIP Prince Phillip. Make God laugh!

You guys aren’t going to believe what it costs to replace a window at the Griffith Observatory.

Looking at my grandma’s yearbook from 1949 and Pat was...built differently

i act like i invented fleetwood mac.

Thinking about the Law and Order SVU softball uniforms again

6 months into the pandemic and I think it’s fair to say my buddy has the worst WFH setup in America

(hands Michael Jordan dinner fork instead of salad fork) "That's when I knew I had to ruin this person's life."

Please God don’t let Michael Jordan be handed an iPad playing something I said

happy birthday to cate blanchett.

Just when I thought I only knew 15 Shakira songs

I expected Little Women to be sadder; three stars.

new years resolution already broken as i am once again swept up in a deadly game of seduction