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@chepkirui_m
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Shida yangu ni I rarely like anyone so nikipenda mtu nakuwa mjinga sana 😭😭
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That world cup final back in highschool when Croatia almost won>>>>
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This man said "Don't ever disobey me"😦wtf did I get myself into
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I used to judge people who go back to the same person severally but pahali nimefika honestly I see the vision 😂
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Going through your notes app after you've healed is so funny 🤣🤣🤣wah I was really going through it😭😭
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It's so heartbreaking when a close friend shows romantic interest in you. It will never be the same😭
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Him:Wewe ni mkale?
Me:Eeh
Him:Nilijua tu.Wakale mnakuanga warembo.Sijawahi ona mkale mrembo kama wewe lakini
Me and probably many others:
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Ingekua "what order are we watching kaleidoscope together"but anyway
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"TURNS OUT THE LINES HE USED ON ME HE USED ON HALF OF NAIROBI.THERE IS NO SIDE THERE IS NO MAIN WE'RE ALL JUST USING ONE BIG PLATE"🗣️🗣️
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Mfs be too dramatic saying "my life is falling apart" whole time ni CATs hajasomea 🤣🤣🤣🤣
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Knowing you're a sensitive topic in someone else's relationship is a top tier feeling 🤣
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The fact that I took an Uber for 400 bob when I could have taken a matatu for 20 bob is my 13th reason🥲
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Me when my classmate asks me if I understood what the lec was saying:
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Met my classmate(who I didn't talk to before) on the way to school today which is a 10 minute walk.Somehow he mentioned he went to that green school in Kikuyu without me asking. There's no saving y'all fr 🤣🤣
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1.Pesa hurudi
2.Your parents aren't strict you're just scared to push limits
3.Cherish your friendships with your girlies and go out as often as possible.
4.Don't put all your eggs in one basket unachezwa
5.Don't cry in public 😭
6.Know your limits when drinking
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We need to conduct research as a country on who mchina was and why were people "gaining" with them😭😭😭
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Vitu boyfriends wenu wanapost kwa hizo notes app za Instagram 🤣🤣🤣🤣as long as you're happy chumi
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Idk how to handle rejection.... cause wdym hunidai fr... kwenda uko
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People are hyping going to South Africa cause there's no visa needed na wameshindwa kuenda Diani hadi... visa was never the issue lol🤣🤣
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Why are people shocked that the Rick and Morty creator is a pedophile with weird kinks.Have you guys watched the show 😭😭 like the whole script is just crazy 🤣
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Men are so confusing 😭 like one day you're Romeo the next you're a Nairobi man again 🥲
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I say thank you to everyone for the simplest of tasks....matatu conductors especially and you can tell they don't get that alot
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Sat in a matatu next to a shawty I streak with and none of us said anything to one another cause what if she doesn't recognize me😭😭
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If you look good on your IG story imma like it.If you think that means I like you you have serious abandonment issues 🤣🤣
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Something about buying a burger for 1600 bob just doesn't sit right with me😭 like be so fr
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I have like 4 birthdays for close friends this week na mbele nyuma Niko na 2k😭😭
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Btw mkipendana from this app na isiwork out si lazima mthrow tantrums tujue. We're GROWN!!😭😭
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Carrying flowers 😭😭
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I proudly admit that DJ Afro had me on a chokehold when I was younger.Nilikuwa tu naskia "alrightaaaaa" roho inatulia🤣
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My tl is full of stressed students convincing one another not to go to class🤣🤣
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Hapa kwa mat kila mtu kando yangu anasoma pdf...eh kumechemka kweli😂
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An academic comeback 😔
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Doing the bare minimum in primary and highschool and passing is so crazy fr cause saa hii kinanirambaa🙆🏾♀️ like wdym I won't just pass cause I'm smart😭😭
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I love this trend for people quote tweeting with interesting facts when someone tweets/asks something stupid 😋
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"It's just a tweet babe"
The tweet:
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Me when the person I was jokingly flirting with on the tl comes to my dm:
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This one 🥺
In fact, screw it, I don’t give a shit about ships that piss you off, what’s a ship that fills you with absolute GLEE when you see it???
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Me gathering the strength to open the one million TikToks my friends sent me😭😭
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Hii shule hata haijali mental health yako wanarelease tu results Saturday asubuhi
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Hii university unasignia mtu Hadi unacram registration number yake😂
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Bora course yangu Haina math I'm willing to write that 7 page essay 🤷🏾♀️
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I lack the emotional maturity for a sneaky link..bro I'll fall in love in 2 seconds 🤣
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I just overheard the security guy at my work place use the same pick up line he used on me on someone else 🤣🤣🤣
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Praying Bien's debut album is full of BANGERSS... like he can't afford to disappoint 😭😭😭
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I know my people pleasing is bad cause I'm still working at my UNPAID attachment after my contract ended just because one person asked me to extend my stay.Bruh
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If you're a med student that posts dead bodies on their story or locket:
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This man has so many hoes even if he posted something referring to me I would just assume it's hoe number 24🤣🤣
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Seven years omg😭😭tomi is so strong cause ain't no way I'd tell that story bila kulia
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I find it so hard to hate people. No matter how dirty someone did me I'll just hate the situation they put me in.🤷🏾♀️
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We all had a crush on Henry right?😭😭
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Me after standing on business
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I just feel like I'm wasting so much built-up rizz cause I'm a woman and I physically can't shoot my shot at a man😭😭
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Leo aim ni upasue waist beads ama buttons za shati ama trouser.Chaguo ni lako🫵🏾
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Haiyaa ati locket was a birthday present from a guy to the gf so that they share pictures of each other 😲Aki mapenzi weweeee🥲
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I don't know even think I fall in love like that.I just obsess over someone until they give me a reason to stop😭😭
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Unaniona nikiwa out unafikiria umepata bibi🤨I came here to have fun I SWEAR I'm not your soulmate
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I get bored and then suddenly remember I have Twitter.I love this app
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Seeing something he'd like then remembering we're not together anymore
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There is a woman somewhere dating 4 men and acting shocked by the Austin lelan stories💀💀💀💀 Nairobi!!!???
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Thinking about how I joined this app to keep tabs on my ex's tweets now I'm here everyday 😭😭😭
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A phone upgrade!
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Reminder that your friend's love life isn't yours .Akitaka kurudia mtu alimlilisha wewe tulia tu cause atamrudia regardless of your opinion 😭😭 mambo ya watu wawili wameonana uchi ACHAA
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Tomorrow is my first day of the semester and I'm already praying the classes bounce😭😭
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Maneno ya wanaume
@omwambaKE
Get her pregnant first, with two kids then sponsor her. when almost done impregnate her again. By the time she graduates mko na watoto watatu
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I'm loving your light , vulnerable
Letting your guard down it's honourable
Specially when the past ain't been that friendly to you,but there's magic in that
You're the flower that I gotta protect
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Finding someone who's as obsessed with you as you are about them>>>>>
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Last time I fully believed what a man said I was in form 2...nowadays I take it with a pinch of salt😂
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Around this time last year I was delusionally obsessed with a man...wah yenyewe history repeats itself 😭😭😭
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There are always Kenyan comments in TikTok videos 😭😭no matter what it is... unemployment really beating our asses🤣
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My mom saw my birthday lunch turnout and was like " kumbe unapendwa". Ma'am??????😭
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birthday dump?
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I be having crushes on the weirdest celebrities.Cause yenyewe I can't explain to you why I like Speed😭😭
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I genuinely can't date a broke man... like you don't have to be crazy rich but kila siku huna pesa
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I wish ningeenda out Leo☹️ if you're seeing this take a shot for me ❤️
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I don't even want much in the dating scene just a considerate man🙏🏾
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