ben
@benvyle
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writer/phd from STS UCL / (sexual) health researcher / they/he / DMs open ✡️
London
Joined July 2008
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our all-inclusive
@TheLoveTankCIC
guide to doxyPEP is here! it answers questions like: how to use it, how effective it is at preventing STIs, how you can get it (in the UK), who it's for, and more! spread the word! 🫶✊
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one thing this pandemic has made me realise is how strange it was that (in the before times) people were expected to go to work/show up to things when suffering or symptomatic with a cold or flu
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at this point i'm actually unsure whether people truly think male pattern baldness is the manifestation of evil rather than benign biological difference
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clearly, discouraging sick leave is one of the reasons why we all suffer from winter colds every year
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gender roles in 2024 look nothing like they did in 1024. why on earth would human brains be hard coded to like “toy trucks” vs “barbies” when our brains don’t even have especially specialised structures for reading and writing - phenomena developed over thousands of years?
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my boyfriend is moving out tomorrow for safety (😔) and has just given me instructions on how to water our FORTY houseplants and i have never felt more stressed in my life....... i am going to kill them all....
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we will never be able to watch that bit of THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA where emily comes into the office with a cold the same way again
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if this bus crashes there is going to be a shortage of graphic designers in london
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but i guess it makes sense since we are all living in the marvel cinematic universe where all the heroes are hot and the villains are disfigured
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guy on grindr: BE ABLE TO HOLD A CONVERSATION!!!!
me: hey, how are you?
guy on grindr: good.
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that time my ex pretended to be dead to see how our dog would react and she did this
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i am actually extremely grateful that people like this exist and have refused to be coyed by probably a lifetime of snide comments and bullying from people that the world would probably be better off without
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what if we are still in lockdown when the drag race finale is supposed to air and ru has to get in drag by himself at home...
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me, taking my PrEP during a dry spell: i am gay in theory and not practice
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the islamaphobia + blatant homonationalism on this week’s
#dragrace
was galling. it’s perverse that being a queer muslim was raised as an apparent contradiction, yet the queens all wore the flag of a queerphobic, misogynous, and racist nation without so much as a raised eyebrow.
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the fact we are this far into monkeypox crisis and the UK government have not even centralised their vaccine effort is reprehensible. queer men are still relying on word of mouth and the tireless work of frontline workers to find out where to get vaccinated.
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animal crossing just sounds like work..... you’re all sucking the teat of capitalism in your downtime 😌
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i'm not exaggerating when i say if this happened while i was on the tube it would be the worst day of my life
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honestly why should landlords, who don’t work for their money, expect payment when so many people are going to be going without pay because of covid-19? 🧐
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if nothing else, shaming people into staying home is ineffectual. shame is *not* a good public health intervention. it tends to drive people into secrecy, avoidance, refusal, denial, to create states of exceptionalism for themselves, and so on.
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biological essentialists of gender betray an absolute refusal to engage with the true complexities of neurobiology and the vast contingency of human culture. humans value and lapse to binaries as heuristics, but the truth is they don’t exist in the stochastic structures of nature
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white gay men are some of the most racist pieces of shit out there because they really think that being gay excuses them from being white men.
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👤👤👤👤
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not a wordle. just a grindr grid in a rural area.
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ableism is the structure that undergirds so much of the human response to this pandemic - the profound neglect of people more vulnerable and the siphoning away of the disabled, quarantined from view.
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the thing that disturbs me so much about the "no kinks or fetishes on display at pride" take is how much it demonstrates the continuous, reverberating power of historic policing of queer sex in 'public'.
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I’m currently writing an article about body image in the gay community.
do you think it is common for gay men to go to the gym because they are good people who want to live a long life to serve the state or is it actually because they are rotten sluts who only care about sex???
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every single thing in this thread is explicable if you assume rationally that this photo is likely a composite of photos from a photoshoot of children who are terrible at sitting still and smiling for photos
Did the late Queen ever pose with her grandchildren and great-grandchildren? Seems like no. 🤔 This photo, taken by Kate Middleton, was edited at least in 9 places. Now the mass media are reporting about it too.
A little thread👇
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the notion of “the psychopath” - the idea that there is a kind of person who is irredeemably dangerous, violent, and evil because *they were born that way* - is psychiatry’s most pernicious and harmful legacy. it is the reason so many people continue to invest in carceral logics.
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my dad started reading one of my tweets out loud at the breakfast table and when i asked him what he was doing he said “i googled you!” and let me tell you i nearly died right there and then
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people are clutching pearls about just stop oil threatening to disrupt london pride as if london pride is simply a grassroots campaign trying to do its best rather than the corporate circle jerk it actually is
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he looks like a 45 year old. in fact, if you are 45, you always look like a 45 year old. i don't care if you have no wrinkles or a lot of skin elasticity or your skin is blemish free. you always look the age you are because that is what age is. it is not something you can escape.
Bryan Johnson 45-year-old founder of Braintree Payment Solutions which also owned Venmo sold his companies to PayPal in 2013 for $800 Million. Johnson just revealed that he spends $2 million per year to retain youth and he uses his teenage son as what he calls his ‘blood boy.’
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i firmly believe that it is important for your long-term mental health to hook up with someone who you think is out of your league and realise they are incredibly annoying
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not only is this tone deaf but this form of cultural product serves to anaesthetise us to the kinds atrocities (present day holocausts) that are going on around us *in* the age of snapchat. as walter benjamin reminds us, the state of emergency is not the exception but the rule.
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we have to address the culture of bitter sexual entitlement propagated by certain gay men on hook-up apps. it’s eerily consistent with incel ideology.
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if you are opposed to settler colonialism or an antizionist, you are making the situation worse by making diasporic jews feel unwelcome or unsafe in the countries where they live. these are the conditions that shore up support for a jewish state *at all costs*
Defacing synagogues in protest of Israeli policy is wrong, full stop.
This kind of antisemitism––holding all Jews accountable for the actions of the Israeli state––is intensified by the insistence of so many politicians that Israel speaks for and represents all Jews.
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sorry but i think it is sad that so many queers - partly because of the shitty politics of 'coming out' - are colluding with a vampiric media culture to compel anyone regarded not-straight to confess their queerness on huge public platforms and for no particular reason.
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all jokes about sober/non-sexual queer spaces aside, we do actually hear in our work constantly that these kinds of spaces are essential for combatting loneliness (and improving health outcomes) for loads of the most vulnerable queer people - especially queer migrants.
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this is a disturbingly misogynistic framing of a woman talking about her vaginismus diagnosis - which is a fraught and traumatic issue for a lot of people with vaginas - and
@pinknews
should genuinely issue an apology for it.
Meghan Trainor discusses 'painful' sex with 'big boy' husband Daryl Sabara
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are we brits ready to concede that “ass” is so much better than “arse”
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“they execute gay people in palestine” well it’s safe to say queer palestinians are currently thousands of times more likely to be murdered by the IDF than hamas, so if you cared about protecting the lives of gay palestinians, you’d be calling for a ceasefire (and more) right now
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israelis ≠ all jews. what the israeli government and its police force and its army does has nothing to do with what i, a jewish person, do. + the israeli government, its police force, and its army are not beyond reproach because some aren't wise enough to tell the difference.
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something we gays don't talk about nearly enough is hypersexuality and age gaps and how hard it is to find a boyfriend because everyone just wants to have casual sex and how toxic the apps are and how pride is not just an excuse for you to get naked and how we need more spaces to
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me in the aftermath of receiving mild constructive criticism about my work
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sorry but i do find it wild that so many people will not consider harry styles - who has so obviously known the touch of a man - queer until he puts it in sky writing or something. i thought we all wanted a society where heterosexuality was not assumed to be the default?
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why are you itching for a gay love island when it’s going to be filled with the most toxic LGBTories you spend half your life moaning about anyway
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yes in the sense that any LGBTQIA+ person can download the app and should never be shooed off of it but no in the sense that i think a cis lesbian would have better luck scoring on uber eats than grindr
GRINDR IS FOR ALL LGBTQIA+ PEOPLE
GRINDR IS FOR ALL LGBTQIA+ PEOPLE
GRINDR IS FOR ALL LGBTQIA+ PEOPLE
GRINDR IS FOR ALL LGBTQIA+ PEOPLE
GRINDR IS FOR ALL LGBTQIA+ PEOPLE
How many more times does this need to be said? Everyone is welcome on the app. It isn’t just for dating.
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i have been going around saying we are in a recession for months.... had no idea that wasn't confirmed until today... for me it was just vibes alone
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i was truly expecting "sine from above" to be a full "cheek to cheek" moment but gaga handed elton the poppers and said let's ride!!!!!
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young gays tweeting disparagingly about receding hairlines or older men…. You are making your own bed babe and it’s going to make you miserable
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an unedited two hour conversation with your friend is not a podcast… i refuse to call this a podcast any more… it is eavesdropping and it is very boring
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queer men will come on here and make fun of the hairline of someone they don’t like and then go on to complain that our communities are ruthlessly stratified by physical appearance
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he really thought he was doing a princess diana
Happy anniversary to this clip that aged like milk
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contrary to what the identity police will tell you, it is a good thing when straight, cis men do gender fuckery
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