In a '90s kinda world, I'm glad I got my girls

It's almost as if...they don't exist

It's interesting how if you mention being single is hard, esp when almost everyone you know is coupled, couples will insist they know "lots" of other single folks, but then they only mention, hang out with, or associate with other couples. So where are these elusive singles?

THIS is the best Christmas special. I said what I said. If you haven't seen it, do it, because where else ya gonna see Grace Jones, Charo, KD Lang, Little Richard, The Del Rubio Triplets, and so many more all in one wild and festive place?

"God isn't in churches. God is just nature". Um, no. Nature is nature. Nature is not SUPERnatural, because, um, it exists. You're trying to distance yourself from religious bad actors, but it's still religion. But, I certainly support fewer people going to churches.

💯, and we need zero new Christmas albums

Why is everything "no holds barred" now? We might do well to bar some holds...

Stating unequivocally that every individual is free to manage this sh*tshow however they wish, but none of the goofy nicknames are funny to me. In the least. Nor the diaper jokes. No matter how many times they're shared and repeated.

Shoutout to the grocery store cashier who deftly created a Mickey Mouse head sticker by combining three round stickers and handed it to a toddler in a cart. Very sweet.

Ableist nonsense of the day: "You won't need any medications as you get older if you just exercise and eat right"

Sometimes we throw around the title "national treasure" too casually. And sometimes it's the perfect description.

There was a time when I couldn't imagine not sending you a birthday greeting. But now, I'm just not up to the inevitable thumbs up emoji response, so nothing it is.

Who in their right mind is paying cash money to "subscribe" to someone's Twitter feed? Musk fanboys?

“The guy who bedazzled this room in gold thinks your child has too many pencils.” - Jimmy Kimmel

Gas company email: "Consider lowering your house temp to 65-70 to save money..." In my wildest dreams, I can't imagine my thermostat at 70. I live in a sieve house I don't own, and to keep things even remotely affordable, it's 61-65 at the highest 🤷🏻‍♀️

Need more opportunities to say "catch you on the flippety flop!"

"Catch and release" is just fish torture 🤷🏼

"I'm so glad I found my person, because the dating apps look like a nightmare!" Ok, but...consider taking this sentiment a step further. If you feel lucky to have found someone, think about your single friends, and who might match up with who. Be a connector.

There's still time to send out holiday gifts! I have jewelry and shirts, all made by meeeee. If you want to skip using Etsy, just message me. If you go through Etsy, use code THANKS for 15% off. https://t.co/s0bKj9NYwj

The hex code for true white is #FFFFFF, and Pantone really just chose #FF3FFC or something, and called it a day, er, the color of the year 😄