Al Shipley
@alshipley
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journalist, critic, drummer, producer, songwriter, teleprompter operator shipley.al @gmail .com
Joined May 2010
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Pinned Tweet
Lithobrake's new single "Wayney Day" is out now, album on the way on May 31st!
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my son and I accidentally ended up on different teams in laser tag and every time I shot him he said "wow" in a dramatic disappointed voice
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taylor swift every time she leaves the house:
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were you NUTTING in her or were you NOTHING to her?
I was NUTTING in this woman 11 months ago and she just got engaged 😵💫
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when i successfully persuaded my toddler to brush his teeth i said "we stan a minty legend" because twitter has destroyed my brain
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"she held me down like..."
[5 second pause while everyone else in the room thinks "don't say coretta, don't say coretta"]
"...like a coretta"
Jonathan Majors on Meagan Good: "She's an angel. She's held me down like a Coretta [Scott King]. I'm so blessed to have her."
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*paul mccartney wearing timbs* blackbird singing in the deadass night
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i seriously pictured Chris Hemsworth's wife putting on Thor hair and kissing Natalie Portman when i read this
Chris Hemsworth didn’t even kiss Natalie Portman in Thor, he had his wife put on a wig and do the scene. A faithful king.
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jack antonoff producing the taylor swift album about matty healy and the eventual 1975 album about taylor swift
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what if Lorde, Lana Del Rey and Halsey all drop their albums at once and the sad teens become so powerful they overthrow the government
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Pluto is 5 years old now. Future did all of this in 5 years.
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ludwig göransson has had the weirdest career. swedish guy makes incidental music for low-rated sitcom, one of the cast members uses his beats for his rap albums, and now the guy has made multiple oscar-winning scores for billion dollar films.
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azealia banks is a 24/7 hater, people just selectively treat her like an oracle of truth depending on who she's hating on
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"kendrick raps over JAZZ SAMPLES" is not the roast some of you guys think it is
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i was trying to remember what the site 'dropbox' was called this morning and all i could come up with for about 5 minutes was 'da share zone'
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Armie Hammer watching Luca Guadagnino and Timothée Chalamet get rave reviews for their new "cannibal love story" movie
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damn, took less than 24 hours for
@NetflixFlims
to get deleted. i had fun with it while it lasted.
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kanye brags about not reading, and is also unhappy with every contract he's ever signed. i wonder if he's ever made the connection.
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j cole dissing tpab is rich because he rapped over "alright" and nobody on earth said it was better than the original
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i don't know if people now even realize that prince, david bowie and bruce springsteen were all enormously uncool for most of the '90s and had to come out the other side of that to achieve timeless unassailable coolness
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y'all wanna know how I got these scars?
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the turning point of Tyler, The Creator's careeer was really when he went "this album is called Scum Fuck Flower Boy...no wait it's just called Flower Boy"
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can you imagine writing a song like "both sides now" at 25 years old, and performing it at 80. like i can't even keep it together emotionally watching this, i have no idea how joni can.
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Hawaii 5-0 reboot where the suspect in every single case is Ezra Miller
Ezra Miller Arrested for Assault in Hawaii, Weeks After First Arrest
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@Slangdini
flo from progressive makes a million a year, being a corporate mascot is probably better money than any other acting gig they'd otherwise be getting, if you don't hate that being your claim to fame
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Yonestown
Kanye West's team has filed a slew of trademark applications that would allow West to create his own mini-community — or as West intends to call it, the "Yecosystem."
Story:
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being an intense method actor who can't act is wild
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2004: Kanye makes a beat, John Legend sings over it
2018: Kanye posts a Prison Paul video, John Legend patiently explains that the Holocaust did happen
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for the record, his team won, and I got the top score on the losing team, so as far as I'm concerned it all ended well
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jonathan majors tries to start his car and the engine stalls. "no!!! if coretta was a car, she wouldn't be like this! be a caretta!"
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lot of talk this year about how weird 1999 was but nothing sums it up like "JAR JAR SUPERSTAR / COLUMBINE: WHOSE FAULT IS IT?"
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once again i am thinking about Sammy Hagar and Eddie Van Halen's relationship deteriorating over Sammy's obsession with writing tornado-themed lyrics for the band's soundtrack song for Twister, against even the wishes of the film's director
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I think you guys need to see this table thats for sale near me...
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jack antonoff after two white claws:
Without tiktok, how would I have seen this??? Riddle me that big government
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it's 1991 and Blur are disappointed that American audiences aren't as enthusiastic about them as British audiences. it's 2024 and Blur are disappointed that American audiences aren't as enthusiastic about them as British audiences.
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man everybody who was on Mad TV is lucky that Mad TV didn't leave enough of a pop culture footprint for their old racist sketches to hurt their career
Alex Borstein is a double acting nominee as Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series for The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel and Outstanding Character Voice-Over Performance for Family Guy. She has been nominated multiple times for each show, winning twice for Maisel and once for
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He's got the eye of the Tyga
Singer
@TheWeeknd
goes public with 18-year-old girlfriend who's
@KylieJenner
's BFF:
http://t.co/lMH9yrsnvg
http://t.co/lUm3zqwepR
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"cuff it" is cool because that song was made by 4 black pop geniuses born in the '50s (nile rodgers), '60s (raphael saadiq), '70s (the-dream), and '80s (beyonce)
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one of my favorite genres of tweets is "10th graders who are haunted by how much more simple things were in the 7th grade"
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a rare music industry story where the guy who actually wrote the songs wound up with all the money and the business partner who didn't is the one constantly fighting to hang on to some of the profits. almost heartwarming!
Damon Dash has filed a lawsuit against Jay-Z over ‘Reasonable Doubt’ streaming rights
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Kanye turned into Eminem so gradually that I didn't even realize that all his songs now are about pill poppin', murder fantasies and a dysfunctional marriage with Kim
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there is only one night left for Ludacris to fuck on the 50 yard line
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the whole pretentious use of "era" as a synonym for promo cycle/album launch is tiresome
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kamala harris will be the first vice president who's dated montel williams (that we know of)
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i know we're all still justifiably annoyed at lena dunham and her hbo deal but in hindsight it's funny that the only person that got a thriving career out of GIRLS was the male lead
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i love that the limp bizkit dynamic is such that people are like "woah fred looks crazy" but are completely unphased by wes
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guys like Dick Pound and Dick Wolf had every opportunity in life to go by Richard or Rick, they know what they're doing
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dua lipa releasing increasingly abba-sounding singles that are too euro for america is cool as hell, actually
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insecure guys will round their height up to 6' but Phife Dawg was 5'3" and just calling himself "the 5 foot freak," a legend
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It Takes Us To Hold A Nation Of Millions Back
Somebody name this Album. JihaD
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Peanuts is best understood as a proto-Curb Your Enthusiasm, Charlie Brown is just an 8-year-old Larry David
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@marisollefleur
whose vomit is being cleaned up!? even when you have an infant or pet in the house they're prob not throwing up often enough for that to be the chore that fills up the chart the fastest
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for their first 5 years as a band Smashing Pumpkins shopped exclusively at Dan Flashes
The Smashing Pumpkins, 1991. Photo by Paul Natkin.
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a good country song just needs 3 chords and the truth. a good steely dan song needs 17 chords and an arch but empathetic portrait of a midcentury american urbanite.
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@iinavannn
@maesburycapital
steve's not an artist, he's just a guy who throws cakes at people
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i should have a tumblr for horny sitcom cast photos called "kink of queens"
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almost every rapper of the last 15 years is influenced by kanye and/or lil wayne, but it's funny that kanye mostly wants to take credit for wayne/gucci-influenced guys. i guess it's not as much of a flex to say childish gambino and jpegmafia wouldn't exist without you.
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@BostonJerry
he shoulda just said "held me down like....meagan good in the '21 questions' video!"
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Wrong Answers Only IS the name of the group
What’s the name of this group? Wrong answers only.
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jhene aiko and big sean keep appearing on each other's new songs with "youtube couple monetizing their breakup" energy
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Gorillaz is so interesting to me, it's like a random grab bag of people get together to periodically make the worst music of their careers and people fucking love it
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huge day for guys who acted like it was the 1950s in the 1970s
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drake in 2021: said that you're a lesbian, girl me too
drake in 2023: feel like I’m bi cause you’re one of the guys, girl
drake in 2025: i must be poly the way i want this cracker
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"Quincy Jones didn't produce Thriller until he was almost 50" -- listen, it's fine if you don't know anything about music before MTV, but a guy who started touring with jazz legends at 19 is not your late bloomer role model
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i enjoy thinking about how george lucas fully expected people to love jar jar binks the way they love baby yoda.
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Drake is 31 years old renting a billboard that says "changing from boy to a man"
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what's cool about streaming music is it offers infinitely more choices than homogeneous radio playlists
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if you think there are too many superhero movies you should check out how they used to make 800 cowboy movies a year and all the cowboys had the same powers
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Envy stands for "earning noble virtue yearly"
DJ Envy & Cesar Pina Sued On Civil RICO Charge Stemming From Alleged Ponzi Scheme
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everything azealia says about everyone else is just her dirty mack sales pitch on why her overrated music should be on the charts instead of theirs
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the "dope on the table" photo op is killing me
BREAKING: A 23-year-old woman was arrested by police after she allegedly stole 65 Stanley cups worth $2,500 from a California retail store.
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IS IT OKAY TO START WITH COLORING BOOK OR SHOULD I LISTEN TO ACID RAP FIRST
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21 Savage raps about shooting people all the time but I didn't actually think he was a bad person until he showed up on "Bartier Cardi" like "hi i don't eat pussy and i don't tip"
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two black men have top 5 songs on country radio right now, and neither of them is Darius Rucker
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everybody that was on "Fuckin' Problems" hates each other now. Rocky and 2 Chainz glaring at each other in the club and don't even know why.
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people say "cancel culture" with a straight face like oj simpson isn't out here chilling and getting retweeted
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"kendrick just opened his mouth, someone go hand him a grammy right now" is a hilarious line and it's going to be even funnier when kendrick actually does win a grammy for one of these songs
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Sting did it in 1986 and it worked out great for him, it's worth a try
Minneapolis City Council members consider disbanding the police
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my son asked me to buy him a sleeveless white undershirt and I had to really stop and think and restrain myself from passing the term "wifebeater" on to the next generation
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not Sally Jeezy Raphael!
Jeezy is getting his own talk show, "Worth a Conversation with Jay 'Jeezy' Jenkins"
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it's so weird that Taylor Swift managed to sell 7 million albums before Kanye "made her famous," how did that happen
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@DionDoes
STEPHEN A: Skip I want to ADDRESS this issue.
[BAYLESS nods]
What Hitler did was whack
BAYLESS: Absolutely
STEPHEN A: BUT!
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the whole music industry is just people who are good at art but bad at business being robbed blind by people who are bad at both
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buddy, they're all Miseducation anniversary tours. what else is she gonna do? make a new record?
Lauryn Hill teases "The Miseducation Of Lauryn Hill" 25th anniversary tour
@MsLaurynHill
⏩ READ MORE:
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