Alright, I keep saying I’m gonna gain some weight but I never follow through, so I’m gonna put my money where my mouth is. If I don’t hit 170 by the start of May, I’ll Venmo everyone who likes this $10
Seeing discourse about saying you play frisbee on the first date. And just wanna say I've said it every single time and they eat it up every time. They be calling me their pretty little professional frisbee player 🤷🏾♂️
Second surgery for my Achilles to fix what the doc messed up, asking for good luck this time rather than being called sexy. Will still take the sexy tho 🤪
After reviewing film I found out I wore my shorts on backwards the whole entire time during the AUDL championship. Idk if should be disappointed in myself for doing that or in my teammates for not telling me 😔
I know you all were extremely invested in my party tournament career. I am pleased to announce I am now 2-0 in party tournaments, after taking home the Fools Fest championship despite battling intense wind. I could make this happen for you too, my dms are open
Was at cava with another frisbee friend in some frisbee gear and I got asked “where were y’all hooping?” by the cashier and I had to say we weren’t hooping, “we were playing frisbee.” I hadn’t been humbled like that in a while, stay safe out there
Sitting on my balcony alone, downing a bottle of Rosé and box of chocolates after already downing enough Chinese food for a small family, in 70 degree weather. Actually one of the my better Christmas’s
Lei out has taught me I should give up on being the fastest man in ultimate, someone else can have it. I've switched to being the best smelling man in ultimate, a big upgrade
Y’all ever be wondering why someone hasn’t texted you back in a while and so you check the convo and realize you were the one that didn’t text back. I’m sorry
Biggest W coming from this weekend was definitely the ~30 new followers I got. And here I was thinking I had to have consistent funny tweets, when all I had to do was throw some plastic.
@elan_slice
Shit take, every single team does this when they score. Have some self control and don’t physical try and hurt people because you’re upset you’re getting waxed
Alright, now that I had a good game are people finally gonna start inviting me to their team for fun party tournaments or do I need more Twitter clout?
I remember when I was younger and all my cousins, aunties, and grandmas were saying that I was gonna be a ladies man. If only they could see me now, playing frisbee lmao. I bet they’d feel stupid
The
#Vikings
had a Kids Club Trick-Or-Treat Trail last night, and Kirk Cousins still attended despite tearing his Achilles on Sunday.
He's a class act through and through.
(📸
@Hometownguy33
)
Congrats to my best friend and wonderful human
@surajmadiraju
Nobody deserved it more! We might have to let other people in on that juice we’ve been drinking now though
Pretty happy with the weekend other than the fact BE decided to not hold another 40 yard dash contest. Was looking forward to getting my flight paid for 😔
Got an anonymous teams call from someone within my company. And all they said was "faster than fast, go darkside baby, go unc baby" and then they hung up. So if you're on Twitter, I appreciate it
I’ll never understand people who can grind work. I’m working 60 hr weeks for my busy season as an accountant rn, and I’m contemplating every decision I’ve ever made in my life, which led me here 🤧
Came to another realization that in order go from a good player to an amazing player I've got to throw a lot more turns. So catch me Saturday hopefully being an amazing player
if Alex Davis was on my team, I would simply throw it as far as I could every time I touched it regardless of where he was, and then go jog to the end zone to high five him.
Really love that the AUDL can post anything and I can just quote tweet it with a reference to speed and ratio them every time. It never gets old, so I thank y'all for that ❤️
Wanted to just say thank you to everyone who introduced themselves/talked to me at nationals. Was super nice to meet all of y'all, and looking forwarding to seeing y'all again/meeting more of y'all. And also big shout out to everyone that asked for a race, y'all the real mvps 🐐
Ya boi just got a raise!!! As such I am no longer looking for a sugar parent but rather a sugar baby. Requirement is to tell me I’m fast.
P.S. I am still looking for a sugar parent
We will be scrimmaging
@atlantahustle
at halftime of the
@Panthers
vs
@Vikings
game this Sunday! 👀 Catch two exciting sports as we defend Carolina from silly purple teams 😜 Tickets at ! 🎫
Some frisbee company sponsor me! I’ll change up my Twitter I swear, I’ll be the best promoter in frisbee. (< ik that’s not much) You telling me you can’t leverage the fastest dude in frisbee??
First deadlifts in like a year and a half, felt pretty good. But I'm def weak af compared to when I last lifted, my baby hands can't even hold the weight. No shirtless pics tho sorry, those r for special people 😝
This old man at the gym came up and talked to me for 20 min about his life and his jobs. And I listened to whole thing because I thought he just wanted to talk to somebody. Then he mentions church and it hits me, he's just tryna recruit. Made me wanna square up with god himself
Was challenged to 2 races today, won both of them. So still holding my title as fastest dude in ultimate. Have a challenger for tomorrow, I’ll keep y’all updated
Fastest man in ultimate has arrived with the
@raleigh_flyers
at
@Panthers
stadium with the
@audl
to play during halftime. There’s still time left to set up a race with a player during halftime. I’d take me against anybody in a 40 👀
I hate it so much that you can't run fast in dreams. Like I know if I wasn't dreaming I'd be dusting these dudes. But instead this 90 year old, 3 foot tall man is hawking my ass down to kill me. Woke up mad af
I hop on BeReal once a week, post my little piccy. And then scroll and react to everyone's post with the most random faces regardless of level of acquaintance. I hope y'all think I'm weird