Alexbuchanan.bsky.social
@alexbuchanan
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Stuff I’ve written has appeared in Newsjack, TSWYW, The Skewer, BTN, and probably the internal training manual for British Gas complaints department.
England, United Kingdom
Joined January 2009
RT @goldchannel: @escapeveloxity @alexbuchanan @PaulReadWrites @nicola_hilliard Another win for @alexbuchanan 👏 who has bagged 6th place to….
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RT @goldchannel: @escapeveloxity In 3rd place @alexbuchanan, we see what you did there Alex 😂 #GoldCrackers
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I love how you can enjoy really top quality free half hour fireworks show each November, provided you don’t mind it being split between 27 nearby houses over the course of nine days.
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90% of community note discussions have people saying ‘this is engagement farming’ as if getting engagement isn’t the point of every post on here. (Except this one).
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RT @AlisonKriel: I wonder if schools take safety into account when they write their uniform policy and insist on dark coloured coats with n….
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Funniest US election result: Trump gets more of the swing states he needs but loses because Texas goes blue. Polling data shows its because key counties saw an influx of Space X, Tesla and Twitter employees due to HQ relocation, meaning Musk lost Trump the election.
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Ever notice how the more ‘fire engines’ you see on the road the more places there are on fire?.
Ever noticed how the more we preach ‘diversity and inclusion’, the more fragmented and divided our society becomes?.
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RT @JohndickensSW: 🚨The special needs system is on the brink of collapse. The government's spending watchdog will publish its own likely da….
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I only knew about this consultation from people sharing comedy suggestions like this - many people may be mocking it but the government has managed to get massive awareness of the consultation without spending a penny.
The NHS consultation going well, I see. This has toppled my favourite suggestion about setting a BMI target for nurses.
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Why isn’t Rishi Sunak watching his kids Nativity play this year?. He doesn’t want to see another person going into Labour. #GoldCrackers.
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What does Santa have to wait for before he knows it’s safe to deliver Taylor Swifts’s presents?. The Eras Snore. #GoldCrackers.
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How do know if Keir Starmer is watching your school Nativity?. Mary and Joseph have a police escort. #GoldCrackers.
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What popular rule change are people making to Monopoly this Christmas?. Anyone who owns the water works goes straight to jail. #GoldCrackers.
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Why is Father Christmas going to find it tough paying VAT on school fees?. All his reindeer are privately sleducated. #GoldCrackers.
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What’s the name of the new Christmas movie where two people fall in love while throwing soup at the Mona Lisa? . Louvre actually . #GoldCrackers.
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“Do you want lies with that?”
Perhaps no stunt in the history of U.S. politics deserves more ridicule than the grotesquely embarrassing mummery Trump put on at a Pennsylvania McDonald’s today. The whole country got sh*ttier because of this. The McDonald’s was closed, the customers were fake, Trump did nothing
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Why did Mary and Joseph spend all the wise mens’ gold when they stopped for water in the desert?. The Oasis had dynamic pricing . #GoldCrackers.
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