FrogDoc
@TueborFrog
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Christian, momma bear, runner, scientist and conservative. I love irony, sarcasm. Congenial loner. Don't make your problem my problem.
Joined July 2009
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Pinned Tweet
I am a toxicologist. As a service during COVID-19, feel free to ask me prior to ingesting anything you have questions about. Things that are marked 'not for human consumption' seem rather straightforward, but my offer remains.
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When Ruth Bader Ginsberg died, I saw nothing but an outpouring of sympathy from the right. What I'm seeing now from the left at the passing of Rush makes me think the left is filled with truly awful people.
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My heart is broken. The man I called dad for over half my life passed away yesterday. I will miss the light he brought to our family. I feel like I’ve lost a bit of my mom again. I love you Paul, you’re finally with mama again. 💕❤️💔
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So,
#CHAZ
residents are learning:
- walls are important
- guns are important
- leadership is important, and inevitable
- supplies come from people who have jobs
Best. experiment. ever.
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Just in case you needed to see a baby platypus today. I did but didn't even know it. 😍
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If you idolize a politician to the point you're teaching your five year old they're heroes and can keep you safe... well, that's some messed up shit.
I found my 5yo daughter’s Elizabeth Warren action figure in her bed when I was making it this morning. When I asked her why, she said “I was scared and she makes me feel brave”. Warren is inspiring a whole generation of litle girls to grow up and move mountains.
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@Audi
You pay your female employees less than males? You know that's against the law, right?
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Parents of littles, please have the "if a grownup tells you not to tell your parents, the first thing to do is tell your parents" talk if you haven't already.
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A year ago my divorce was final and I was living in an apartment dealing with a huge financial burden not of my own making. I’m now in a home and my credit score is 160 points higher than it was. I’m praising God today! Prayers and hard work pay off.
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My 98 year old grandma just sent me $20 with a note to go buy myself a pair of jeans without holes in them. 😂❤️
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Buttegieg: if you eat meat or use plastic straws you’re part of the problem. Meanwhile....
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Prayerful friends… my stepdad is very sick. He is in ICU and his lungs aren’t working well and he’s not improving. Our family is at a loss. Please pray. His name is Paul.
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Y’all. My kid, who’s been playing soccer since she was 5, made the high school team today. I legit cried.
#proudmom
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My friend’s daughter’s girlfriend came out as transfluid this weekend. I said WTF is that? Basically her gender changes based on how she’s feeling on a given day. You literally have to ask her every day before you use your pronouns. Y’all I am so accepting but can’t keep up.
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As many of you know I lost my mom last weekend. Now, my stepdad is in the hospital with Covid and congestive heart failure. Can I ask y'all to keep praying for our family. Losing two parents within days is unimaginable....
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#MyUnintendedJoy
turned 11 recently. I was unmarried, but she started my beautiful family. So glad I am
#ProLife
#RoeVWade
#MarchforLife2017
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This dear woman is my grandma. She is 100 today!! Happy birthday grandma!!!!
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Last week I inadvertently left a case of soda under my cart and ended up not paying for it and felt so badly. This week I'm watching adults break into stores and take really expensive things. There's such a huge moral disconnect I can't wrap my head around it.
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Wait. Are the same people saying we should require proof of vaccination to move around the country the same ones saying it’s too difficult for everyone to get an ID? So vaccine passports are inherently racist?
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Twitter: where the assholes are anonymous
Facebook: where you discover that half your friends are assholes
Nextdoor: where you discover the assholes are closer than you think
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My thoughts on the Hollywood feminists who remained
silent while Weinstein assaulted women; they stem from a personal experience /1
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Trump banned an entire type of fabric? Who knew.
The Supreme Court's decision to uphold Donald Trump's Muslin ban in 2018 is worth revisiting, "not as a window on the past, but as a warning about the future," Linda Greenhouse writes.
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Congratulations. You are the first generation in our nation to march for *fewer* freedoms than the previous generation.
#NationalWalkoutDay
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Y’all. My dog just walked out of my bedroom with my bra on and now I’m dead. 😂
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Why do people who write recipes think we need to hear their life stories first?
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At the hospital waiting to check in for my shoulder surgery. Nervous and excited. Could sure use some prayers this morning ❤️
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My kid nicknames everyone in his phone so I never know who's calling. I was "electric scooter" til I told him to change it. Now I'm "Big Chungus" ... which I had to google. Now I'm gonna ground him.
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Smelled burning hair earlier and wondered what the heck?? Turns out my cat stuck his head in the fireplace and singed his whiskers off. 🤦🏻♀️
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What kind of teachers would put this out to scare kids? What pigs.
Milwaukee teachers union made fake tombstones to protest reopening schools
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Told my kid to "light a match" as he walked out of the bathroom.
Does anyone under 40 know what that means?
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My dog slid off the back of the couch and landed like this. Now he’s been sitting like this for 10 minutes just staring ahead and it’s freaking me out a little 😆
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In what world is setting fire to a federal building not domestic terrorism?
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Accidentally told the ex "I love you" before hanging up the phone.
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@Scaramucci
@JoeBiden
@realDonaldTrump
I can't even begin with what the stupidest part of this tweet is.
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@LifeNewsHQ
*Looks through Bible to see where God instructs us to live by our own convictions*
*keeps looking*
*still looking*
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@thisisfoster
Let’s shame them! Great idea pastor! I think that’s what Jesus did to the woman at the well.
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Thank you for standing up for your husband against all those horrible women accusing him of sexual assault.
#HillaryThankYouNotes
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After a bone marrow transplant and 110 days away from home, my stepdad just learned he's cancer free! Praise God for answered prayers!
#cancersurvivor
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Just when I marvel at how insane Alyssa Milano sounds, Kathy Griffin emerges to give me a dose of perspective.
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I usually take Milo with me to pick the kids up from school. Yesterday just before I left I found him laying in bed with his cat. So I left him home. Then we got in an accident and, while my kids and I were safe, he would’ve been hurt. Things happen for a reason.
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@Acosta
He's in his 70s, running the country, recovering from COVID and has been campaigning for weeks, yet he whines less than you do.
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Ok I won't repeatedly say it but I'll say it once. It's true. Vaxxed people can carry the virus. I mean, if vaxxed people can become sick with Covid, how would they otherwise contract it if they couldn't carry it? The vax status of one person doesn't impact the health of another.
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Wonder why it's so hot this summer? An underwater volcanic eruption in the Tonga in 2022 resulted in huge amount of water vapor injected into the atmosphere. Water vapor is the Earth’s most abundant greenhouse gas- this effect may last up to 5 years.
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Abortion isn't healthcare, as it kills half the people involved. 97% of the time it's done out of convenience. When Roe v Wade was passed, it was done so to provide safe, legal and RARE abortions.
#7in10forRoe
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I don't know who needs to hear this, but move your frozen turkey to the fridge.
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For the 30% of women so impoverished they can't buy a condom, please ask your partner to provide one.
#ProblemSolved
#priceiswrong
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How can Trump be an asshole for building a giant wall, while simultaneously being responsible for the current state of affairs at the border?
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Our family could use prayers. My stepdad died last month, and his nearly 102 year old mom isn't doing well. She's currently in the hospital. Grandma doesn't understand why she's still here, and my mom and dad aren't... it's just all really sad and we could use wisdom.
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A year ago I had a conversation with God. He led me to scripture about tithing.
Me: 10%?!?
Him: yep
Me: but I am in debt, and I’m finally digging out
Him: *Justin Timberlake stare meme
Me: 😩
Him: thief
Me: 🤔
➡️I just paid my last two bills off and I am now debt free!⬅️
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If you have to say "long story short" more than twice during a story, you, in fact, failed to make it short.
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Big presentation at work this afternoon. Like, at the office. I had to shower and put pants on. Wish me luck.
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It appears the same crowd that thinks criminals will obey gun laws are whining that non vaccinated people will not obey continued mask mandates. 😂
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We live in a world where orgs like Planned Parenthood can illegally harvest and sell fetal tissue and those who uncover it are the criminals
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Hollywood is like that table of loud drunks at the bar laughing at each other's jokes while everyone else just rolls their eyes
#OscarFail
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Y’all please pray for my mom. She had a heart attack this morning and is in the hospital. Stepdad is home bound and won’t be able to take care of himself long and I’m on vacation so am not close to home. 🙏 Thank you.
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have few rights. But don’t be fooled into thinking you can truly right a wrong and stay comfortable. That’s not how it works. Trust me./end
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Does the thought of injecting a rushed, novel vaccine into the populace of an entire country freak anyone else TF out?
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Hi medical expert! I think you're having trouble so I'll help. Gender is determined by a Y chromosome coding for TDF (testes determining factor). Testes form if present (boy), in the absence- ovaries (girl). There! A scientific opinion from someone who took a biology class!
Hi Matt. I'm a doctor. I think you are having some trouble, so allow me to help. Gender is not defined by whether you have a uterus/ovaries or penis/scrotum. So now you have a scientific opinion from a medical expert!
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The CO2 emissions created as you drive to the theater will melt three glaciers.
#ReasonsNotToSeeAlGoresMovie
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@thehill
Someone should tell
@LeoDiCaprio
science isn't something you believe in, like Santa... people's interpretations of it are another matter.
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I have successfully completed another trip around the sun. Let the celebration commence!
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When you're trending on Twitter for being an asshole, chances are you're Lauren Duca
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First foray into the dating world last week with a video date. Got curious and looked him up on Facebook. He’s ENGAGED. 🙄
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You hit someone, we're stopping right?
You call an Uber and this guy shows up. What’s the first thing you say?
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18 and 56. Some days I wish I could go back and talk to her. 😂
18 vs 51 Yes. I know. Age happens. But I like who I am now.
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Can we please stop putting the word "gate" after every potential scandal? Watergate was watergate because WaterGATE.
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Getting my PhD, landing a good job, having two kids and supporting my family. THAT is persistence. Sen Warren can suck it.
#ShePersisted
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But a woman can still voice Bart Simpson...
'The Simpsons' will no longer have white actors voice non-white characters
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Know how your lower leg pops up when the doctor hits your patellar tendon? That’s what my middle finger does when a Biden ad comes on television.
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Sexism is showing loud and proud today.
Isn’t Marsha Blackburn missing a Tupperware
party somewhere?
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I really think some people believe having seven abortions is better than having seven kids.
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