Thinkwert
@Thinkwert
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The tygers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction, while the spiders of math are wiser at the courses of deduction. “The most factual account on 𝕏”
The American Midwest
Joined May 2014
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Pinned Tweet
A Code
I will be kind
I will not thirst
I will not sneer
I will not be bitter
I will rt judiciously
I will like all good replies
I will seek out good accounts, large or small
I will protect my feed with mutings and blocks
I will tweet creatively
I will tweet with craft
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If it is too cold for you, it’s too cold for them. Bring them inside.
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When the archaeologists opened the ancient vase, little did they know what primeval dark power they had unleashed.
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On April of every year, I take a backwards photo holding my twin daughters.
2016.
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My tires have got these little threads growing on them and I think it is so cute. Like a little fuzzy sweater to keep them warm.
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I love it when my strawberries get that real soft, silky down, like when they look like little Santas.
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The Chinese have access to culinary delights that we in the West can only dream of.
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This is what you get without an HOA.
We have one place in our neighborhood that isn’t governed by the HOA and this is what we get as a neighbor.
This is what you get without an HOA. We have one place in our neighborhood that isn’t governed by the HOA and this is what we get as a neighbor.
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My twin daughters turn seven next month. Each April, I take a backwards photo holding them.
2016.
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staircases designed by people who hate people who use staircases
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now, uhh, let me be clear, you, uhh, you may find yourself living in a shotgun shack
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One of the key drivers of Sicily’s economic recovery is its strong export sector, particularly in salami trees. The island is the second-largest salami orchard growing province in Europe, behind Tuscany, accounting for around 10% of Sicily’s GDP.
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At their peak, there were 35,000 giants in the UK. Now there are less than 85.
Every village used to have its own giant. They usually worked at the mills but they’d also clear roads and help put out fires.
However, towns gradually phased out giants. Technology was cheaper.
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“Whispies” are giant creatures that live in the Scottish highlands. They are generally harmless but their intense curiosity can be alarming to the bystander. They are 99.8 percent water vapor.
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No
we are not stopping there
we have plenty of anxiety at home
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Don’t be afraid, little buddy. We won’t hurt you. Come on out of there, little guy.
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“The dwarves delved too greedily and too deep? Wow. I didn't know that... They awoke in the darkness of Khazad-dum. What else can you say. Shadow and flame. I'm actually sad to hear that."
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son
I have acquired a
conical bacteriophage
for your birthday.
thank you
thank you
Papa
I love it
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@HeidiBriones
I won’t be able to hold them in a few years, but I’ll keep going as long as we can.
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The replies have been wonderful but I cannot really keep up anymore, so I’m going to mute the thread for myself.
I’ll first add two outtakes from yesterday and answer some questions:
Is it the same twin on each side in each photo? Yes. I am holding R in my left and C in my…
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I have blocked
the canal
that was in
Egypt
and which
you were probably
using
for the global economy
Forgive me
It went sideways
so fast
and out of control
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𝒀𝒐𝒖’𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝑻𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈, 𝑪𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒍𝒊𝒆 𝑩𝒓𝒐𝒘𝒏 (𝟐𝟎𝟎𝟎) is often called the darkest and scariest of the holiday specials based on Charles Schulz’s beloved comic strip. It is thus far the only Peanuts special rated NC-17.
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𝘗𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘢 𝘗𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘴𝘴 is a 15th century painting. It is a major stylistic advance in portraiture: the girl is set in an airy, three-dimensional, realistic setting, and stares at the viewer with an expression that is reserved, yet intelligent and alert.
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“You can’t get lost bro, the city streets are set up as grid”
The city grid:
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A peaceful moment in the snow with the largest fungus in the world, the giant ice toadstool (Falsifyendron giganteum). At 60 feet in height, it is one of the most massive living beings on the planet.
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in 1964, legendary Japanese director Akira Kurosawa attempted a version of The Lord of the Rings called “Yubiwa Monogatari.”
Financing collapsed after two weeks of production; star Toshiro Mifune refused to work for reduced pay.
Only scraps of the film remain.
READ MORE ⬇️
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One of the more obscure moves in chess is the 𝘦𝘯 𝘱𝘶𝘱𝘴𝘴𝘢𝘯𝘵, in which the king piece is replaced by an alert dog.
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Ladies and gentlemen of America: we are surrounded. Please retreat to the red zone. I repeat: you must retreat to the red zone.
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The time classic ‘80s action-films bad guy henchman Al Leong (he memorably stole a candy bar in Die Hard) had his wedding announcement posted in Kung Fu Masters Magazine by his future in-laws.
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we live in a era that mocks God and his rightful order and we should be terrified
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This QR Code takes you to a website for a garum restaurant in Pompeii that hadn’t updated since 79 AD.
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Kafkaesque
In one of the craziest stories I've ever covered: a former University of Iowa hospital employee had been using another man's identity for most of his life. The other man was arrested for identity fraud and committed to a mental hospital a few years ago
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When the people writing the user manual have never used the product.
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I’m at the intersection of art and technology and it’s terrible
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Pizza Shop Rule
#1
: Yeast doesn’t stop expanding just because the dough is thrown into a dumpster.
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Illegal sales of raw honey have spiked by 76 percent in the last year alone. Transactions are taking place in broad daylight by brazen dealers.
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The “green ice” glacier of Cicely, Alaska, is the source of all the world’s Mountain Dew. More than sixteen tons of Mountain Dew icebergs are calved every day.
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Before the portals between our world and the Fae Kingdom were closed in 1909, tourists would often visit the English bordertown of Ombersley to pose with visitors from the other side. Photographs could be purchased for a copper penny or two; silver coins were strictly prohibited.
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Half of the people with raccoon profile pics are saying “yes, that is exactly right” and the other half are saying “how dare you, how dare you divulge our secrets.”
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Been renting out a few rooms in our house to pixies and fairies. The older crowd still likes the traditional tree stumps, but those born in the last 200 years or so like the electric amenities.
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The Westphalia Ripple speaks thirteen languages. It begs passersby to touch it, but those who do so vanish within it. (None have returned.)
Local city officials are planning on building a protective chainlink fence around it, pending environmental impact studies.
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Now have to mute this thread, unfortunately. I’ll leave you all with some more raccoon heist pics.
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My favorite part is the last three seconds where you can see the glowering eyes.
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An 11-year-old Arkansas boy has caught this pigu fish. The pigu is an invasive species from the Faerie World dumped in the pond.
Pigus, when caught, will whisper a curse in the Fae tongue. No one cursed shall live past a year.
The cursed boy’s family has started a GoFundMe.
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For every polar bear who strikes it rich in soft drink advertising, there are dozens back home in the Arctic living in dilapidated housing.
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“If raindrops could talk, what would they say?” asked the poet.
“Let’s find out,” said the tech guy.
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We sleep peacefully in our beds at night only because spiders stand ready to do violence on our behalf
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His brain has been taken over by a complex hive of hostile powers, making him repeat their nonsense in his own confident tone. He thoroughly believes what he says are his own genuine thoughts; nothing he says truly is.
Fortunately, nothing like this can happen to people.
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One of the more obscure moves in chess is the 𝘦𝘯 𝘱𝘶𝘱𝘴𝘴𝘢𝘯𝘵, in which the king piece is replaced by an alert dog.
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“Continental drift theory” but it is a lot weirder than we thought
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These are the last known photos of the Miskatonic University expedition to Sudan (1908). The expedition disappeared without a trace three days later in a sandstorm. No bodies or artifacts were recovered; attempts to reconstruct the location through global imaging have failed.
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The Great White Shark Petting Zoo of Galveston, TX was the brainchild of Sam Venn, who wanted to improve the public perception of sharks, especially among young children.
Tragically, a set of wrongful death lawsuits forced him to close in 2019 just three months after opening.
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Bears seldom meet together, even for merriment and diversion, but the conversation ends in a conspiracy against the humans.
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This small vehicle is the innovative Escher Cherry Picker, which works by bending the dimensions of space-time towards the worker rather than extending a basket.
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