Vikki
@TetchyBitch
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Following
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Dog owner, mum to a beautiful and opinionated toddler, owner of very little patience but a lot of shoes. Doesn't respond to unsolicited DMs from strangers.
England, United Kingdom
Joined May 2017
It’s been pointed out to me that these may have been discarded from a stolen bag. They were handed in at Barking station. Please retweet.
I’m on a train and someone has left this behind. This is the saddest thing I’ve ever seen.
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On the train to Manchester for lunch with the girls. Outfit packed in bag. On reflection, I should possibly have checked the weather before packing a mini skirt and sparkly sequin shirt but never mind, here we find ourselves.
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"Well madam, your cervix might think it's a size 12 but it needs to start dressing for the size it is, not the size it would like to be"
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Apparently one of my fibroids has grown back. So that's nice. And my uterus has also been described as 'bulky'. I don't even know what to do with that information. It sounds a bit judgy.
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So true.
When i was a kid my bedtime was 9pm. I couldn't wait to be a grown up so i could go to bed whenever i wanted. Turns out, its 9pm. 😂
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Stop the closing of St Andrews Workbridge! - Sign the Petition! https://t.co/T0x1xNy9Vg via @UKChange
change.org
Stop the closing of St Andrews Workbridge!
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Friends in my phone, I need an opinion because I can't decide - what colour should I choose?
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It was minus 2 when I dropped Splodge at nursery and T-Shirt Dad was STILL dropping his off wearing joggers and a t-shirt. I am astounded, baffled and in awe all at the same time.
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I have to get a train from Manchester to Milton Keynes tomorrow, during Storm Claudia. Confidence in Avanti to get the train out on time or indeed at all, not high...
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This is terrible advice. Try pulling my chair out while i'm in the middle of dinner and you'll end up pulling a fork out of your arse cheek. Also, on the long list of people that a grown ass woman shouldn't be calling Daddy, anyone she is sleeping with is top of it.
this is genuinely the worst advice i have ever read in my entire life. this guy is 100% a virgin
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Sent Mr V to work with a cake I made to share with his team and instructions to bring back leftovers. Did leftovers come home? No lads, they did not. I WANT CAKE. Fewmin.
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Right wing Twitter are baffling. They are apparently gearing up for battle on the streets of London with Ant Middleton and his band of macho crusaders yet at the time, too scared to catch the train to reach the fight. It's all very confused.
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Received a threat of court summons for an unpaid parking fine recieved by a car I have never owned in a car park I haven't been in. How's your day going?
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Someone in our village has made a 'Halloween Tree' and knitted little presents for the local kids to collect from it. Splodge is thrilled. Lovely, wholesome niceness to brighten up this increasingly toxic platform.
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Today I am working from a rented 'Co-Working' space. I feel very modern. And old.
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Me and wee man did some baking like proper civilised people. One slightly burned apple and frangipane tart and an apple crumble. There is smashed Digestive EVERYWHERE.
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I am grumpy and fed up and so I have bought a fluffy cardigan I can't really afford with dinosaur buttons and rainbow sleeves. This has cheered me up. Money can't buy happiness but it can buy a cardigan with dinosaur buttons. Here endeth my life lesson for today.
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I have the norovirus and it turns out the bang I heard at 5.30am was the boiler blowing up. Strong fucking start to the week. Happy Monday everyone.
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Where the fuck does anyone who lives in the countryside store stuff? Garage? Mice. Shed? Mice. Teeny tiny hideous loft space? Squirrels. Cupboards? Sloping ceilings so nope. Where the ever loving hell are you supposed to put STUFF?
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