The Pocket Programmer
@PocketProgram
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1,679
Following
1,116
Media
1,054
Statuses
19,768
I make games and game assets. I make tutorial videos for YouTube.
Joined January 2022
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Look at these two totally different, totally real people liking posts I was mentioned in.
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@WriterJewell
Upon a quick glance, I thought that was macaroni and cheese. So cover then with cheese sauce and pull a prank?
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My daughter: when I’m older, I want to get my masters degree in mathematics and work for NASA at the international space station.
My son: I just farted.
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@CicmilJovan
My issue with all these “no code” and other similar containers allowing the inexperienced to take advantage of powerful technology… is that it’s NOT no code. You’re just not the one doing the code.
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I’m about to turn 44, my wife has just over 6 months before hitting that same mark. We were talking tonight about having a third child. What do you think?
(Btw, my single favorite thing about Twitter is that i don’t actually know any of you and get to be open like this.)
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@Talk_To_The_Hat
All but “Catcher in the Rye.” I also don’t believe that these are the “most banned” books. Half of them were required reading in school. And how the hell does “Slaughterhouse Five” end up on a banned list? People got issues with Kilgore Trout or something?
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I have a 14yo student interested in video game development. Do you think it’s better for them to learn something simple like Python first, or dive head first into C++?
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My son turns five tomorrow. The last thing he said to me before going to bed was, “when I’m 13, I’m going to be so annoying.”
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What’s stopping you from coding like this? (I hope the joke is more obvious this time)
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“Friends are just enemies you haven’t made yet.” - me
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Be honest. Is it possible for me to be a full stack dev with no sense of aesthetic and no artistic ability? I’ve got enough technical know-how and I’m getting better, but my design skills are trash, and haven’t gotten any better since 1997.
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@jayblackisfunny
How are we going to get T-Swizzle to the Bowl on time? Isn’t she going to be in Tokyo or something? Oh wait, is this all part of the plan to get the Japanese to vote for Biden?
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What’s that saying about red sky in the morning?
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This was me this morning, 7/4 in a hotel in Niagara Falls Canada. I’m 211 pounds. I intend to get back down to 185 by this time next year.
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It’s my birthday. Where are my Balloons? If this is Musk’s doing…😤
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Coding while drunk. Can’t wait to review my code tomorrow.
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Thank you 826 followers. (Am I doing this right?)
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I have a printout of the entire “Lemonade Stand” program in basic. How much do you think it’s worth?
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My wife is adorable. She thinks our daughter is going to be honest with us about everything when she’s a teenager.
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Free to keep from my local library if anyone is interested.
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My son colored an elephant in art class. I’m digging it. Now you can dig it too.
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I love sushi, mochi, and sake. I should just move to Japan, right?
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My 5yo is asking questions about death. Any tips?
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Got my $1.38 payment from recent book sales. (Thank you robot Java lover.). That brings my yearly total to $1.38
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@wordwestpress
Fiction, especially, needs to be historically accurate. And even if by omission, a lie is a lie. A proper book should just be every historical event that happened between the start of the book and the end.
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@TheHealerDM
After Biden took office and got PSLF back on track (denied twice during previous administration costing me several thousand dollars) I got most of the remainder of my loans forgiven, which put my DTI under the magic number to refinance our home, and wound up saving $1500/month.
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No real combat yet, but not bad for about five hours of work.
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If aliens DID come to earth, what human invention do you think they’d be most impressed with? Keep in mind, they flew light years in advanced technology, so like, an iPhone isn’t moving the dial. My offering: rollercoasters
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My worst behaved student (by far) voluntarily participated in class today, and even had the correct answer. What the hell is going on here?
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My 5yo made his first program today. I helped him with the top line and the spelling of half the words. That’s it.
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I made this with CSS. The C is obviously chicken.
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I’m at roughly 80% hotbots for the likes on all my posts.
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4th time this week I’ve woken up thinking it’s Friday. And it’s still not Friday.
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Any artists out there want to make me a small overhead “hero” image? Not looking for good, just looking for better than I can do.
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@DeanSloan12
@DarkEden21
“Cis” as a prefix is literally the opposite of “trans.” Cisgender literally means “not transgender.” It’s a technical term. I am unable to fathom how that could possibly be offensive to someone. Inaccurate maybe, but offensive, no.
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It’s been almost 11 years. Still not sick of grilling like this.
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I have NO sense of style. But my wife keeps asking me how things look on her. I literally have no idea, and have been explaining as much for years. Why does she ask me every time?
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@CicmilJovan
I teach math and I’m always combatting “why can’t I just use a calculator?” Same thing. The calculator is great, even necessary sometimes, but you still have to understand how things work or you’ll end up a cog in a broken machine.
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If you don’t make statements like this, you cannot call yourself a douchebag.
if you don't code daily, you cannot call yourself a programmer
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I know it’s not sustainable, and I’m fully aware that some of this is water weight (which I’m about to put back on), but it’s nice to see the scale read 11 lbs lighter after one week of dedication.
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@TheRealDudja
I would do B, because I can turn it into C (and then some) with minimal effort.
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I cannot believe I got over 90% of my algebra students (who can’t read or add) to pass their state exams. I’m feeling NO imposter syndrome right now.
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Took long enough. I finally did it. I finally got Covid.
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@tienphaw
This is technically very cool, and for that reason, I hope you aren’t offended when I say, I hate this. I’m 32 years in to my existential crisis, and “countdown to death” is giving me anxiety.
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@williamlegate
It’s a good thing the FBI can’t figure out where people live. That would be government overreach.
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When I was younger I spent hours playing video games
But one day I thought:
Why am I wasting all this time?
So I cut my sleep from 7 hours to 4
And now I get to spend MORE time playing video games.
When I was younger I spent hours playing video games
But one day I thought:
Why am I wasting all this time?
There are no rewards, only entertainment.
Why not play a game with actual rewards:
• Money
• Freedom
• Self-actualization
This game is called building a business.
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My order at McDonalds claims to be -5 calories. I’m going to just go ahead and assume that’s true.
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It is unbelievable to me that someone would break into my house while I was on vacation, just to replace all my pants with the same ones only one size smaller. I mean, who has the time to pull off such an elaborate prank?
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……….*sigh*……….
………………..
……….guess I’ll finally learn git.
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One of my students wanted to sketch me. I feel he captured my essence.
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Pretty sure I’m going to Italy next summer. My wife speaks the language well enough, but I’d like to not be a typical American tourist. Best way to learn the language?
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No sunburn is more satisfying than one you get while your home is getting 16” of snow and power outages.
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My 10yo just rage quit a game of Minecraft, and is now anger dusting the house. This is normal adolescent behavior, right?
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My daughter wasn’t responding to a text, and a 16 year old suggested I try calling her. I forgot that I can call people on my phone. No joke.
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@Kari_Creative
I said to someone today, “please don’t take this the wrong way, because I don’t mean it, but please shut up.” It worked, but I know my audience.
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Whelp, Niagara Falls ON, is about a billion times cooler and nicer than Niagara Falls, NY.
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@maryam_farsh
What exactly is an American accent? Is it the Brooklyn? The Boston? The Texas Drawl? Fargo, North Dakota?
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If you don’t talk to your kids about Loren Ipsum, someone else will.
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Tomorrow is my birthday. Kids will get these clues (and they know roughly my age anyway) to figure out my age. Can you? (As of tomorrow)
-my age last birthday was a prime number.
-this birthday I am the product of a prime and a square.
-next BD, a different prime and square.
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So the reality is, I don’t own a bikini. Will you settle for sexy dad bod in shorts and white socks? (And also sucking his belly in?)
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My kids: fighting about a video game, so I make them turn it off and do something else.
My kids: fighting about my laundry basket.
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@epicdndmemes
Cleric necromancers are better anyway. Earlier access to animate dead. Rebuke undead, instead of turning. Lots of good stuff.
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Is there a good word for living selfishly, but not at the expense of others?
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Long day. 4 hours of driving. One win and one loss for my team. But this was lunch!
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I’m such a dork that I’ve decided if I can’t find a graphic design program that works the way I want it to, I’ll MAKE a graphic design program that works the way I want it to.
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Me to daughter: looks like it’s going to rain soon, so let’s bike later when it stops?
Wife to me: it’s not supposed to rain. Phone says 0% chance.
Now that it’s raining, what should my reaction be?
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@AlexaSommers
Humble brag. First trans kid I ever met told the guidance counselor that they were going to be dead by the end of the year. I was the only teacher they didn’t hate, so I let them eat lunch in my room, and taught them a little computer programming. Now they’re a software developer
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Also just fixed the hot water heater. I’m saving so much money thanks to YouTube and a C- ability to fix things.
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My daughter says it’s gross but not as bad as you’d think. My son said he actually kinda liked it. I’m afraid to try.
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I haven’t written a line of code in over a week. I don’t regret my choices.
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Still needs work (and the camera angle sucks) but a full stage of my game is playable.
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Decided to try the Twitter circle thing. Not so sure how accurate it is. Don’t get me wrong, I like everyone pictured here, but I interact with some outer circle people way more than inner. And Felicia Day has never responded to me.
My Twitter Interaction Circle
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Why don’t dropdown menus for the question “what state do you live in?” ever contain “denial.”
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Whelp, I really tried to like Kimchi. It turns out, I don’t like kimchi.
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Forgot my wedding ring at home, and I’m pretty sure the check out lady at Dollar General was flirting with me. I may be 44, but I don’t look a day over 43.
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@NotifyNurseRyan
This picture is a perfect metaphor. He’s wearing ceremonial armor that is useless in combat, and he’s not left handed, so it’s also a lie.
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Dudes, even if you don’t mean it, even if you’re not wrong, just apologize. So much easier.
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Finally hit 1K. Now if I could just get every follower to subscribe to my YouTube channel and watch all my videos, I could start making money from that darn thing.
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I’ve had 8 great days of diet and exercise, and I’m seeing results already. But now I don’t feel like sticking to it today, and the weekend is going to be busy and involve cake and pizza and whatnot. If you could all just yell at me a little bit, that’d be great.
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