Trying to Drive To Long Island (Sopranos Intro Style).

Maybe if they had watched the show sooner it wouldn't have been cancelled smh.

Thanks for responding to my tweet from six years ago. I needed that.

RT @Bob_Janke: I'll be at the Improv Comedy Club tonight. Whipping batteries at people.

Guess the Mets didn't see his recent tweets!.

In heavy metal years, Ozzy lived to be 157.

Watching PBS and every show now is just a guy sitting in a lawn chair saying "Viewers like you did this.".

Love wearing a shirt with a logo or a character on it so some rando can be like "Hey, I'm a fan of that too." and most times it takes me a minute to realize what they're referencing.

"Whoa, this comedian is raising an eyebrow in their headshot, we have to go see them!".

Love Trader Joe's. I've never bought anything I just go there to film content.

RT @uncledoomer: why does this guy look like hes about to open a shop in my town that sells items that fulfill the townspeoples deepest dar….

Always seems good and safe when you can hear the electricity.

Getting pissed off thinking about my imaginary son deciding to start wearing a top hat.

Dudes will tell each other stories about shitting their pants and then be like "Hell yeah" for some reason.

After 17 years of the MCU many fans are wondering if perhaps comic books should be illegal.

RT @fightgeek: i light a cigarette. the natural gas under Yellowstone ignites and rolls a fireball all the way to Kansas.

Comedians In Cars Trying To Avoid Paying $9.

RT @ScottsdaleVeins: @JoePontillo He’s founding a startup called Astrologer. “Next time you’ll know what’s coming.”.

Hope the Astronomer CEO starts a new company and does the same thing all over again in like six months.

Whoever told you that people wanted to see you post the same picture of your kid every other day was obviously trolling.

David Wright seen removing his plague and retired number from the stadium.