🇺🇸 JewWhoHasItAll
@JewWhoHasItAll
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Satirizing US ✝️-normativity & ✝️ hegemony from a ✡️ POV. @JWhoKnowsItAll has explanations. she/they Follow/RT ≠ endorse
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Just a reminder that I’m not actually here anymore.
Shalom, ex-Twitter, and thanks for all the fish.
G'mar chatimah tova.
You can always find where I went at
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Dear Teachers,
As some of you may know, if you have any students in your class who identify as Christian, they may ask to be excused from school to observe the Christian holiday of “Christmas,” more popularly referred to as Yom Christmas or Nittel.
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Dear Teachers,
The Christian holiday of Easter is approaching.
Since it always falls on First Day and sometimes falls during Pesach Break, as it does this year, you may not be aware that our Christian students are celebrating this Christian holiday.
1/27
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Dear Teachers,
As some of you may know, if you have any students who identify as Christian in your class, they may be absent while observing the Christian holiday of Christmas.
1/16
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The date of Yom Christmas is set according to Pope Gregory’s calendar, so the holiday moves around on the normal calendar.
This year, Yom Christmas falls on Rosh Chodesh Tevet.
Although it will also be Chanukah, Christians do not observe Hanukkah.
2/x
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Out of politeness for their sincerely held beliefs, please refrain from asking Christian students to explain how the prophet's unwed mother became pregnant.
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It is a common misconception to think of Yom Christmas as a “Christian Hanukah,” but the holidays are not related, even though Yom Christmas sometimes falls during Chanuka.
Nor is it an observance of Rosh Chodesh.
4/x
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The traditional greeting for Yom Christmas is "Merry Christmas." If you forget, a simple chag sameach is never wrong.
Thank you, as always, for all your hard work!
Shavua tov!
Yael Cohen
Superintendent Ramban Public Schools
#MedinatAmerica
31/31
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Dear Teachers,
During the busy holiday season it is important we not overlook our Christian minority in their celebration of Yom Saint Patrick Ha’Kadosh.
One of your students may be celebrating this obscure holiday this week alongside Purim!
1/17
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Students in your classes may express that they feel sorry for the Christian students who have only one day of holiday, and no candles.
6/x
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You may explain to them that Christian students have their own holiday traditions, some even with candles of their own, and that in their way they enjoy their holiday just as much as we enjoy Chanukkah.
7/x
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Observance of Yom Christmas begins on Erev Christmas.
This may seem like an obvious point to make, but since the Christian day typically starts in the middle of the night, the time holidays begin is not always obvious.
9/x
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The holiday lasts only one day, even outside Medinat Vatican.
5/x
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Christians light candles only if they have a five-candle Advent Menorah (pictured) with the fifth candle for Yom Christmas.
This candle is lit without a bracha.
3/x
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Some students have a minhag of wearing garish sweaters to school in the days leading up to Yom Christmas.
Please DO comment on the ugliness of the sweater. They believe the uglier the sweater is, the better.
23/x
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Most people assume that Yom Saint Francis Ha’Kadosh is the most important Christian holiday, falling as it does during the holiday season.
But Yom Christmas is also widely observed in the Christian world, and it has many fascinating and colorful customs.
8/x
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Most students love sharing their culture.
Your Christian students would probably love explaining the significance of all of their colorful holiday minhagim to your class.
Perhaps you could ask Christian students to explain the major mitzvot of Yom Christmas!
12/x
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Christians typically attend their Christian shuls for a special maariv service at the beginning of the chag.
Most Christians do not attend shul on the morning of Yom Christmas, even though it is an important yom tov to them.
10/x
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The story of the prophet’s barnyard birth to an unwed mother is considered religiously significant for Christians and the holiday is widely celebrated by both religious and secular Christians.
14/x
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The depiction may feature a rendition of the baby prophet, his mother and her fiancé, some farm animals, and several richly-clad Wise Guys bringing gifts.
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Yom Christmas commemorates the birth of the Christian prophet Yeshu.
You may notice depictions of the baby prophet in an animal trough.
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Fun fact: some gentile children have reverse tzedakah boxes where they deposit coins they want to keep for themselves. They are usually shaped like swine and are called swinebanks.
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If you happen to live near a Christian shul, you may notice a sukkah housing some people and animals.
This isn’t actually a sukkah but a depiction of Yeshu’s birth scene.
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In modern times, Yom Christmas incorporates many religious rituals that were appropriated from Yule, which is the Celtic pagan celebration of the winter solstice.
One Pagan-derived custom is to bring greenery, including entire cut trees, inside the home.
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Many Protestanted Christian shuls do not even host Christian shacharit davening for this day, even if it falls on First Day (as it does this year), which is the Christian Shabbat.
11/x
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Some students might ask to hear JingleBells. This is the anthem of “Christmas.” It is acceptable to play the song once during snack time if requested by a student.
Here is a link to the song, in case of a request:
...
26/x
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The birth scene is sometimes depicted in the form of a drama, with actors and real animals.
You should refrain from petting the animals, as it is not a petting zoo.
18/x
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Since Yom Christmas falls on a weekend this year and lasts only one day, Christian students should not need to miss any school.
Students who feel they need to miss class for their observance should bring a letter from their Christian rabbi.
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You may also remind Christian students that we already celebrated their chag of Yom Saint Francis Ha’Kadosh months ago during the holiday season, and it is unreasonable to be expected to recognize every single minority holiday in
#PublicSchools
.
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Frum Christian families may insist on a real tree for halachic reasons, but many secular Christian families use an artificial tree because natural ones are so expensive and hard to find, given the minimal demand.
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Christaica shops and specialty Christian grocery markets sell decorations for the trees, but thrifty Christian families know it’s easier to buy sukkah lights and ornaments on clearance after Sukkot!
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Your Christian students may love sharing with the class how their family goes about choosing a kosher tree, and the bracha they say upon sacrificing the conifer.
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Yesterday I wished my gentile neighbor Anthony a “Shana tova u’metuka, chatimah tova” and he replied “I’m not Jewish, I don’t celebrate Rosh Hashanah.”
SO??? It’s the new year whether or not you celebrate it.
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Dear Principal Pereira,
This morning I received a phone call of complaint about the craft project that our second graders did on the last day of class before Sukkot break. It turns out that this family was Christian, although I don't know how I was supposed to know that…
1/6
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There are several other traditional songs for Yom Christmas but most are religious and therefore not suitable for use in
#PublicSchool
.
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Most of these holiday sweaters will probably be yellow & white— the colors of Christianity and every single one of their chagim— and might have pictures of Saint Nikolas Ha’Kadosh ("Santa") surrounded by deer / polar bears because they believe he lives in the Arctic Circle.
24/x
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Christians who speak English often call the holiday ‘Easter,’ which is named for the pagan deity Eostre, a goddess of the spring, or perhaps an early German word for “dawn.”
3/27
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Recall that Yom Saint Nikolas Ha'Kadosh was last week, as part of the Christian Holiday Season.
25/x
Original at:
#DearTeachers
,
The next holiday in the
#Christian
#Holiday
#Season
is Yom Saint Nikolas Ha’Kadosh. The holiday observes the yahrzeit of ancient Christian tzaddik Saint Nikolas Ha’Kadosh.
1/x
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Christians commemorate the execution of the Christian prophet, Yeshu, on Yom Friday HaTov (Sixth Day this week).
They believe that he was mystically revived three days later, on what is called Yom Rishon shel Pascha by Christians.
2/27
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Melacha is not prohibited on Yom Christmas nor on other Christian holidays, so if you notice your Christian friend (if you have one) posting pictures to Facesefer over their yom tov, please do not assume they are mechalel yom tov.
30/x
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The traditional greeting is "Merry Christmas" or sometimes "Seasons Greetings." If you forget, a simple "Chag Sameach" is never wrong.
13/16
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#DearTeachers
,
Tomorrow some of your Christian students may be observing the Christian holiday of Yom Saint Valentine Ha’Kadosh, more commonly known as Christian Tu B’Av.
It is one of their important religious ‘Feast Days’ that even the least frum observe.
1/15
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Some students may travel on pilgrimage to Vatican or Jerusalem for their holy day of Easter, so those students may have an excused absence with a letter from their Christian rabbi.
Thank you for all your great work. Have a joyous Pesach and a restful Spring Break!
27/27
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Although this is the holiest day of the Christian year, Christians drive, light flames, and use electricity.
You should not assume your Christian friend is mechalel Yom Tov just because they use electronics on Easter.
7/27
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Check if you need to know the exact number. It is also a good resource for other Christian holiday dates since they move around so much from year to year, and it doesn't even coincide with a new moon.
Thank you for your hard work!
16/16
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Dear Teachers,
Some of your Christian students may be observing Yom St. Valentine Ha’Kadosh next week.
It is one of their important religious ‘Feast Days’ that even the least frum observe.
1/11
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Symbols of the holiday include a fascinating mix of religious symbols such as that of the execution method used on the Christian prophet and several pagan symbols of spring, including lambs, eggs, and rabbits.
10/27
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Merry Easter to my Christian friends and followers!
I forgot to schedule this but now that it’s chol ha’moed I can tweet it. I hope it’s not too late. I’ll do better next time!
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The date of Easter is calculated to ensure that it always falls on a Gregorian “Sunday” (First Day).
Although all Christians follow the same Gregorian calendar, they do not all follow the same liturgical calendar, and not all Christians keep Easter on the same date.
4/27
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Eight days after Christmas they celebrate the day of their prophet’s bris as their Rosh Hashanah.
14/16
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So many holidays this weekend! It’s a really special time when Pesach, Ramadan, Vaisakhi, Mahavir Jayanti, and the Tamil / Bihu Bengali / Theravada New Year all coincide.
Holiday blessings to everyone celebrating one of these, spring, or something else!
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Officially, the holiday commemorates the birth of their prophet. In modern times, the holiday incorporates many pagan winter solstice rituals as well.
2/16
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As terrifying as this belief sounds, apparently the children really look forward to his home invasion because they wake up to presents that Santa left for them in the middle of the night.
4/16
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... how the prophet's mother became pregnant or how Santa Claws has time to visit all twelve Christian families in our school district in one night.
12/16
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Religiously observant Christians attend services at their Christian shul in the morning of the Easter holiday, sometimes at sunrise.
Musical instruments are sometimes used, as Christian yomim tovim have no restrictions on use of instruments.
6/27
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Note: St. Nicholas Ha’Kadosh is obviously a religious figure and must not be incorporated into any
#PublicSchool
classroom celebrations.
7/16
2
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Some students might wear garish sweaters. Please DO comment on the ugliness of the sweater. They believe the uglier the sweater is, the better. Most of them will probably be yellow and white— the colors of Christianity—
8/16
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Some children may believe that a man named Santa Claws (aka St. Nicholas Ha’Kadosh) will visit their house on a sled pulled by flying deer while they are asleep.
3/16
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Please refrain from telling these students that their parents make the whole thing up— they will get angry with you for spoiling the "magic" of Christmas.
5/16
2
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I did my best to appease the parent but they seem totally irrational; I wanted to let you know the situation in case you hear from them.
I hope you had a wonderful Simchat Torah and sorry to trouble you right as you get back into the swing of work!
— Moreh Saadia Halevi
6/6
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(This is similar to magical Christian beliefs during a spring festival when a magic bunny visits children in the middle of the night to lay colorful chicken eggs in hidden nests throughout their houses or yards.)
6/16
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A festive seudah may be held after Christian shacharit services, including rich foods previously forbidden during the Christian Omer II season.
8/27
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The association of rabbits with Easter has ancient origins, possibly originating with an ancient belief that a hare could reproduce without loss of virginity (like Christian beliefs about their prophet’s mother), or maybe an allusion to fertility and the arrival of spring.
11/27
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Please do not assume your Christian student will feel comfortable asking questions about Christmas. They might feel uncomfortable being treated as a spokesperson to explain...
11/16
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The empty egg is taken as symbolic of the Christian prophet’s empty tomb.
Confusingly, plastic eggs are normally filled with candy, and are not left empty.
24/27
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Secular Christian families often hold a seudah even if they do not attend davening.
Traditional Easter foods are an important part of the holiday, and many Christian families eat specific foods according to the minhag of their particular ethnic group.
9/27
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Their calendar counts the years since the bris. It was a bit over 2000 years ago.
15/16
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@vtucherov
Thank you for the correction! I’ll update it in my notes so I won’t make this mistake again next year.
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Christian children go to bed the night before, eager for the arrival of the Arnav shel Easter, a hare who brings gifts to good children.
The Arnav shel Easter leaves baskets full of gifts of candy and small toys, nestled in a pile of shredded green plastic, for children.
21/27
2
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Some students might ask to hear Jingle Bells. This is the anthem of Christmas. It is acceptable to play the song once during snack time if requested by a student.
10/16
5
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Consult for Western Easter dates, but the Mizrachi Christian calendar may celebrate a week later.
5/27
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If a frum Christian friend keeps a strict treyf diet and requires chametz in their meals it may be a time to avoid inviting them to your home. This is a wonderful time to meet them outdoors where you may respect their dietary needs without bringing chametz into your home.
17/27
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Dear Teachers,
I hope your Pesach preparations are proceeding apace!
As we all prepare for Pesach, some of our Christian students may be preparing for their own week of holidays, which, however, does not coincide with Pesach.
1/31
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I have so many new followers this week— welcome!
To those of you who are gentiles: I hope you don’t mind seeing a barrage of content about holidays you don’t at all celebrate. It’s just that these are very important to me & the others in the US who are not minorities like you.
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You may be aware of a custom of eating the “body” and the “blood” of the Christian prophet as a religious ritual, but this custom refers to eating bread and drinking wine.
13/27
5
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Although some Christian groups have a custom of eating lamb on Easter, this custom is unrelated to the ritual of the bread and wine and does not constitute consumption of a person, symbolic or otherwise.
14/27
2
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Dear School Families,
It's Girl Scout Hamantash season! Attached is the order form for hamantashen from my daughter's troop.
No pressure to order but EVERYONE loves hamantashen in this holiday season!
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... but others might have pictures of Santa Claws surrounded by deer or maybe polar bears because they believe he lives in the Arctic Circle.
9/16
2
16
722
Lambs are a symbol of Easter, since they represent spring and new birth.
Lambs also relate to the Christian idea that their prophet was a human korban chatat; the Christian prophet Yeshu is therefore sometimes called the Lamb.
12/27
4
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@Andy35o
I didn’t even realize any Christian movies exist. Can I please have my 2 billion dollars now?
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I was invited to a gentile friend’s baby… shower? But the baby isn’t born yet, so how do we wash it? I am so confused.
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Some eggs are made of chocolate and covered in colored foil to represent the spring flowers.
The Christian Easter egg is unrelated to the egg on the Seder plate, and it is not a symbol of the korban chagigah, and there is no need to roast it.
20/27
2
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#DearTeachers
,
Some of your students may be requesting a day off to celebrate the Chag Milat Yeshu, also known as the Pope Gregory Rosh Hashanah, and is observed by Christian people as the
#Christian
#NewYear
.
1/x
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In some families, the Arnav shel Easter hides eggs for children to find and collect in a basket.
In spite of popular belief, the Arnav shel Easter does not lay the eggs— only brings them and perhaps hides them.
22/27
2
17
679
Some Christian shuls hold a special egg hunt activity for children, so that Christian children have a chance to meet other Christian children and do something fun together.
Colored eggs, real, plastic, or chocolate, are hidden for Christian children to find.
23/27
4
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The lamb is not eaten with bitter herbs, it is permissible to break the bones of the meat, and there are no rules as to how young or old the lamb may be.
15/27
2
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660
Eggs are also a common pagan symbol of rebirth and spring.
In the past, Christians would boil them with flowers, a symbol of spring, to color them. Today, Christians use chemical dyes to color their eggs.
19/27
3
19
657
Easter falls on the weekend every year, and it usually falls over Spring Break, so students should not need to ask for any days off for it.
26/27
3
13
650
My friend Na’amah asks: "I’ve been invited to a gender reveal party. I’m so nervous, I’ve never been to a gentile event! Do you think $180 is an appropriate gift?"
Does anyone know?
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Easter has no restriction on eating chametz, and indeed, many of the traditional foods contain chametz.
16/27
3
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641
Dear Gveret O’Malley,
We received your letter of complaint about the timing of the Winter Graduation ceremony, set to be held on the second morning of Rosh Chodesh Tevet this First Day.
1/x
15
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642
Eggs are forbidden during the period of Christian Omer II, so the reintroduction of eggs in the Christian diet is a festive occasion, and eggs are eaten in abundance on Easter.
18/27
3
15
614
My friend Eli just found out that his kid’s daycare teacher is Christian. He asked if it is customary (or just nice) to give a gift to the daycare teacher for the Christian holiday “Easter.”
Does anyone know?
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The parent became even more agitated and said that they don't make a holiday booth because they don't celebrate Sukkot. I assured the parent that people of all religions build a holiday booth and this craft isn't meant to exclude anyone.
4/6
3
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605
My Christian friend Christina says the high-five emoji (🙏) reminds her of prayer. I don’t get it AT ALL!!!
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It's not too late to buy your
#GirlScout
#Hamantashen
in time for
#Purim
this 5783
#HolidaySeason
!
Look for local troops'
#hamantash
booths in front of grocery stores all across the city!
#MedinatAmerica
46
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How was your Break Fast, EVERYONE?
(I can’t actually fast— it’s a mitzvah to eat if fasting makes you ill— but I still love a good Break Fast.)
98
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It’s an outrage that we can’t even sing a NONDENOMINATIONAL hymn like ‘Yigdal’ at our events.
26
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I offered to send the child home with some animal stickers today to give their holiday booth a Yom Saint Francis Ha'Kadosh theme. The parent was not at all assuaged and said that animal stickers do not solve the problem at all because they do not have a booth of any sort.
5/6
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