Jeff Topolski
@JeffTopolski
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Writer at @RockstarGames (formerly @brooklyn99 ). I have a lot in common with Taylor Swift (born in 1989, currently on groundbreaking world tour, etc.)
Los Angeles, California
Joined March 2010
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Cop: What tour?
Justin Timberlake:
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We were filming a scene where Holt walked into the break room and Andre was like "Why am I walking into the break room?" and we were like uh idk Andre, why do you think you'd walk into the break room and he was like "Maybe I'm coming in here to eat a bowl of soup?"
This is devastating. It was such a joy and an honor to watch Andre Braugher work. So talented, so kind, so fun. Can't believe it.
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In honor of tomorrow being the final day of shooting for B99, here’s some fun BTS content:
The set up The shot
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Love that a hook for this is “but get this, the bears have no idea they are being ranked by viewers at home!” as if the bears would have some big reaction to that news
Peacock has greenlit the first ever wildlife reality competition show titled The Hungry Games: Alaska’s Big Bear Challenge.
The show follows Alaskan bears as they bulk up for the winter, but the bears are unaware their progress is being tracked and ranked by viewers at home.
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It was end of day Thurs of a shoot week. We found out the ep was coming in short. We had to write an extra scene that could be filmed the next day. We came up with this goofy ass tag to the ep, that ended with Holt yelling VINDICATION! And Andre knocked it out of the fucking park
A good 70% of Brooklyn Nine-Nine’s appeal was Andre Braugher’s ability to nail literally any line delivery. They clearly wrote toward it in later seasons, where they’d just see can he make saying single words funny and he always could.
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This clip was after Holt told Rosa he wanted to meet her new gf over dinner ("Kevin's making his famous rice"). Andre loved to milk the pauses, my favorite being the long pause before "I love you as well." Also, we had so much more "rice" content that didn't make the ep (1/2)
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First time meeting Andre, I was a PA and walking w/ him to his dressing room after the season 2 premiere table read. I was awk and tried to make convo, "So what did you think of the script?" He said "It was a fine script, although I think there's still room for improvement" (1/2)
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It was such a Holt answer, I was like oh my god, Andre Braugher IS Holt. Then he saw Chelsea Peretti across the way and yelled "PERETTI!" and did a little sing-songy dance thing. That's when I first learned Andre Braugher contained multitudes.
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We did a bit where Gina had a "Holt Sound Machine" and to get the clips for it we recorded Andre saying various phrases for it... this was my very first time on set for my episode and I nervously snuck this video of Andre giving a few versions of the phrase "get some."
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I think we ended up scrapping the soup, but that's how Andre was, a true actor's actor. There was a purpose behind every single thing he did, and Holt was this amazing character because of Andre. He knew Holt better than anyone. There will never be anyone else like Andre.
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This is devastating. It was such a joy and an honor to watch Andre Braugher work. So talented, so kind, so fun. Can't believe it.
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So we were like ...okay! And props went and got him a bowl of soup and it was filled to the brim for some reason and when we started to film the scene he had to walk into the room so, so slowly and carefully as to not spill any soup, and Andre took it very seriously...
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Even just having my name share the screen with Andre Braugher was an honor. The best to ever do it.
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LA people, how are your non-LA parents handling the hurricane/storm? My mom called me to tell me to get to higher ground and remind me I'm "not that great of a swimmer"
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Movies Bradley Cooper would hate (a thread): 12 Angry Men
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While we were filming B99, Andre flew back home to the east coast every single weekend to be with his family. He was clearly committed to his craft but he was even more committed to his loved ones
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We shot ANOTHER overly-long rice phone call that went at the end of this story. This made me laugh so hard but it added so much time to the episode... wish we could see the "rice cut" of this ep because Andre really took these simple phone call scenes to the next level (2/2)
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Need to know how seriously to take this hurricane thing... is this like "lol a hurricane is gonna hit LA" or "omg a hurricane is gonna hit LA"
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In a comedy room, we're often split into two separate rooms, one working on story, one working on a rewrite. Let's say you have 12 writers, 6 in each room. But actually 2 writers are off on script this week. And also, 2 writers are on set. And the showrunner is in post today...
The WGA proposed that TV shows should hire a minimum of six to 12 writers, but some writers disagree.
“Nobody asked for this,” said one prominent showrunner. “Every showrunner I know is against this. It doesn’t make sense to anybody.”
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Final day of shooting for Brooklyn Nine-Nine. This photo is from back in season 6, but just wanted to highlight all the amazing people that help make this show what it is. "Anyways, I'm gonna go cry in the bathroom, peace out homies." - Jake Peralta and also me right now
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153 episodes… and I have been lucky enough to be a part of 131 of them. Being part of this show has brought me so much joy and I love hearing that it’s brought so many fans joy as well. Thank you for watching, tonight we ride off into the sunset in a blaze of glory
#Brooklyn99
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A fond B99 memory: the writers room ordered a giant pizza and it wouldn’t fit into the writers office so we had to have it delivered to the soundstage and eat it in the Briefing Room.
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Parasite's Oscar win is incredible, but one thing that should also be acknowledged is Han Jin Won's win for co-writing the script. He was a freakin' PRODUCTION ASSISTANT on Snowpiercer. Thank god for people like Bong who are able to recognize talent and elevate it!
#Oscars2020
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This is something I'll probably never be able to say again, but I spent 7 years on one show and it was the best experience of my life. From picking up lunches as an Office PA, to writing for the final season, and everything in between... thank you Brooklyn Nine-Nine.
‘Brooklyn Nine-Nine’ To End, Again, After Eighth & Final Season
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You know what’s cooler than one strike? Two strikes…
SAG-AFTRA National Board Unanimously Agrees To Send Authorization Vote To Members
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And then the Pop-Tart man said “this is my body, which is given for you.”
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At the end of the day, the Backstreet Boys retweeted my cold open, so I'll always have that
#Brooklynninenine
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They should do this for the VP reveal
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"Drew Carey, we wanted you to be the first one to know that the WGA Negotiating Committee reached a tentative agreement for you tonight..."
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This is the classic AMPTP playbook:
1. Plant a story in the trades trying to divide union members on the issues
2. See that the planted story totally backfired
3. Summon hurricane
Hurricane Hilary Forecast To Hit L.A. Sunday With Tropical Storm Force Wind, Rain & Big Waves
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Remember how Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping was one of the funniest movies to come out in the last 10 years?
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Nine + Nine = EIGHTEEN!
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Honored to have an episode on this list...
#Brooklyn99
Episode List (Taylor's Version) ❤️
Unsolvable (S1, E21)
Terry Kitties (S3, E19)
Coral Palms Pt. 2 (S4, E2)
Mr. Santiago (S4, E7)
PB & J (S8, E5)
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Sometimes I get embarrassed when I’m on the picket line and someone asks “what have you been up to since B99 ended” and I have to say well, nothing, I haven’t staffed since 2020! But then I’m able to be like, and that’s why I’m out here!! And why so many other writers are too!!
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🧵 I took a class in college called Primetime: The Game of Television. In the class, some people played networks and the rest were creatives. We would spend class pitching various shows we came up with to the networks and they would schedule them in a lineup... (1/4)
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Almost every show that has tried to emulate LOST has STARTED with all the weird, crazy, twisty stuff but the joy of LOST was the slow ramp up of weirdness as the show went on. Teased it a bit in the beginning but then built it up more and more as the seasons went on.
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Now you have 4 in one room and 3 in the other. That could work, but isn't ideal. And that's STARTING with 12. Imagine starting with less! Writers rooms aren't 12 people sitting around one big table all the time. The work is often divided which is why room size is so important...
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Brooklyn Nine-Nine:
S3 (2015-2016) - 13 writers, 23 eps
S4 (2016-2017) - 14 writers, 22 eps
S5 (2017-2018) - 13 writers, 22 eps
S6 (2019) - 12 writers, 18 eps
S7 (2020) - 12 writers, 13 eps
S8 (2021) - 14 writers, 10 eps
Writers, think of a show you worked on then tell us the ep count and writer count to show what used to be the standard. I’ll start:
The 100 S3 (2015) CW
16 episodes
11 writers including Showrunner (includes 2 teams)
Not including WA, PA, or SC which were 3 separate jobs not 1.
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On B99 before we had landed on Bill Hader as the new captain for S3 premiere, we had pitches for various options, including The Rock. Even though we didn’t get The Rock, this notecard stayed on the board the entire season…
#Brooklyn99
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We need to hang that striped suit in the rafters of every AMC like it’s a retired jersey
Nicole Kidman’s original AMC ad is now retired with the 3 new ads now starting to play in theaters.
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We realized we had to adjust our strategy and the next week, WE had the top-rated program, Kanye West Interrupts Stuff. Anyway, this is a long thread just to say this seems to legit be Max's approach to making shows right now and I think it's bad (4/4)
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Two new eps of B99 tonight including an episode I co-wrote! The Pontiac Bandit is back! Will everything go smoothly without any issues?? Probably not! Watch tonight or on Hulu or go to a bar and ask them to put on B99 and then tell everyone to be quiet so you can listen!
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Happy Easter!! Here is an Easter photo I took on set on Halloween for our Halloween episode where it was also Easter!
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I worked in a room that almost always had 13-14 writers. We would always be split into two, sometimes three rooms so we could be more efficient. And you know what, we would still fall behind. It's just how it goes. But now imagine a room of 5 trying to make all of this work...
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And this is just addressing efficiency in the room, WHICH STUDIOS SHOULD CARE ABOUT! Not to mention the other huge issue of lower and mid level writers getting shut out of small, upper level only rooms, which has affected so, so, so many writers, including myself!
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Some dude pops out of a bush with an iPad to reveal to the bears they are being ranked by viewers at home and gets mauled to death
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My only hope for the Halftime Show is that we get a Shy Ronnie appearance
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Hey everyone, my episode of Brooklyn Nine-Nine is airing tonight! It was so much fun to work on and I can't wait for everyone to see it! There are two episodes back to back, the first is at 8:30 and mine starts at 9:00pm. Check it out on FOX or catch it on Hulu tomorrow!
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7 years ago today I found out I got a job on Brooklyn Nine-Nine, and this week they are shooting the series finale. It's been a wild ride, so glad I got to be part of it for so long!
#brooklyn99
#NineNine
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I co-wrote this week's episode of B99 with the wickedly talented, one and only, Lamar Woods! While Jake and Doug are on a road trip, I will also coincidentally be on a road trip and won't be able to watch live, but YOU SHOULD WATCH LIVE IN MY HONOR!!
#Brooklyn99
#PontiacBandit
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Doing a career pivot and becoming a horror writer who writes from my unique POV (someone who is extremely scared of horror movies)
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@franklinleonard
What I'm unclear on is if the "dreams really do come true" sign is in reference to winning the football game/pop tart bowl or whatever, or if it's the pop tart man's dream to be ritually sacrificed to nourish a football team like this. Or maybe both??
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One Last Ride (my mom saw the naughty joke on this poster and now I’m grounded, fuck, I hope it was worth it) (dang guys, I got grounded again for swearing in that last parenthetical, RIP my social life)
#Brooklyn99
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Another B99 one is when we wrote Holt calling his dog Cheddar “chonky” and on set he said “chunky” and then I got to explain to Andre Braugher what “chonky” was
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Sometimes I just sit and get upset about how amazing the premise of Party Down was
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I promised takeaways so here we go!!
1. The pilots that stand out to me the most are the ones where the writer really leaned into a clear and distinct tone/voice. The dialogue, the jokes, the characters, even the action lines, all contribute to this...
I've been teaching a pilot writing class at UCB since 2021. I've taught 24 sections of the class so far, and w/ 6-8 students in each class, I've probably read about 150 pilots during that time. That's a lot of pilots! I might share some takeaways at some point... stay tuned??
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Wow, that was fast...
CAA Acquiring ICM Partners; Will Be Biggest Agency Link-Up Since WMA-Endeavor
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We spent a long time crafting the world, characters, and ep ideas for our pitch. But the first week we lost to the top-rated program, Zach Galifianakis Milking Things. A show where supposedly Zach Galifianakis would milk different animals each week. It was a WAKE UP CALL!! (3/4)
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The way I see it, my tv writing career can go one of two ways: 1. continue to staff on comedy shows and rise through the ranks to eventually sell my own show, or 2. stall out and totally flounder for the next 5-10 years until Brooklyn Nine-Nine is inevitably revived or rebooted..
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THIS ENDS TODAY but if not today that’s totally fine, we’re down for whatever!
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I wrote tonight's episode of
@nbcbrooklyn99
! It's about therapy, so please lay on your couch while watching to get the true 4-D experience.
#Brooklyn99
Get your couch-laying clothes on because we are going to therapy, y'all!
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We’ve got the CEOs coming in on a Saturday like they’re overworked support staffers, let’s do this!
To our members: The WGA and AMPTP met for bargaining on Friday and will meet again on Saturday.
Thank you for the wonderful show of support on the picket lines today! It means so much to us as we continue to work toward a deal that writers deserve.
#WGAStrike
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Everyone here was support staff on Brooklyn Nine-Nine at some point during the 8 season run! Back at our Radford stomping grounds.
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If this tweet gets 10,000 likes I will pay $20 for Trolls 2: World Tour, buy a Trolls wig, and make a video of myself performing every song from the movie. If this tweet gets less than 10 likes, then I will not buy Trolls 2, and instead, just feel inadequate
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The thing I like most about being a TV writer is getting to be on set. And the thing I like most about being on set is the free donuts. So at the end of the day, I put myself at the whim of this grueling and unforgiving industry... for free donuts
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If you make a movie about a real person and DON'T include a side-by-side in the credits of how similar the actor looks to that person... why even make the movie?
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Okay, okay, here me out... Brooklyn Nine-Nine (Jeff’s Version)
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Staffing meetings I had while working as a Writers Assistant/Script Coordinator: 5
Staffing meetings I've had since finishing my first actual Staff Writer gig: 0
I know everyone is saying it's crazy out here, but... it's crazy out here, folks!!
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Oh wow! My pilot, CULT-E-SAC, is the Top Comedy Winner! The only thing I’ve ever won before was an office Oscar pool, but this is way more satisfying! Thanks Launch Pad!
Congratulations to the winners of the 2022 Launch Pad Pilot Competition!
Click to view the Overall Winner, Top Drama Winner and Top Comedy Winner, alongside our three Launch Pad Mentorship Selections.
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Me trying to figure out what all my new writer twitter friends I haven't seen in person look like when they change their profile photo from the orange WGA one:
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When you work hard on something really special but forget your laptop at home and need your wife to save the day all for 13 likes… (better than 12!)
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Wrote those vows, hoping I’m in the clear…
I'm getting married in less than two weeks. Is it scabbing to write my vows?
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@carolinerenard_
I think it’ll be Roy Cooper because he’s term limited as a governor so it is a bit easier/safer logistically but Shapiro could be a more electorally strategic pick
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I had an amazing time on set for tonight’s B99 episode! East coast, I hope you enjoyed it! West coast, I hope you enjoy it! Middle of the country, has it aired for you? Wow I don’t understand time zones...
#Brooklyn99
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WAIT FOR REAL THIS TIME, THIS ENDS TODAY AKA IT ENDED TODAY AKA WE DID IT!
THIS ENDS TODAY but if not today that’s totally fine, we’re down for whatever!
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This is maybe the hardest thing to explain to anyone outside the industry. The jobs? Those are secret, only reps know about them (and sometimes they actually don’t). But you saw a show get announced? Too bad it’s actually wrapped two seasons already, no jobs there…
are there any other industries where job openings are kept like a fucking secret the way they are in Hollywood? Because this system is truly for the birds I’ll be honest.
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