The bees are loving the spring weather! Makin' dat honey 🍯

the key to happiness is to put your phone down, go outside and watch people slip on the ice.

Remembering Large Marge, who passed away 52 years ago today, on a night, just like tonight.

28 years ago tonight, December 18, 1997, NBC aired Seinfeld’s Festivus episode, “The Strike.” In it, the Costanzas mark Festivus on December 23rd, complete with grievances, feats of strength, and that famous aluminum pole. https://t.co/MgcRa2g9TA

SPONGEBOX SQUAREPANTS. Follow & RT with #XboxDesignLabSpongeBobSweepstakes for a chance to win 2 Limited Edition SpongeBob controllers & an Xbox Game Pass code 🧽 Don’t forget to check out @SpongebobMovie, only in cinemas! Ages 18+. Ends 1/4/26. Rules: https://t.co/S0lJx02OGC

hello my baby

Dear Gen Z Sorry everything cool happened before you were alive Love Bob

I accidentally wore a red shirt to Target today, so of course you know what happened... I got killed by a Star Trek villain.

All that separates us from dogs is our respect for the rule of law and our ability to digest chocolate.

I always wear a hat in case Im ever in a high speed chase and they cut in front of a train and escape i can get out of my car and throw my hat down

And then the little dog would say "yo quiero Taco Bell" and we would all laugh and laugh. It was a simpler time.

Shout out to the person who invented steak. Well done.

Your, and I cannot stress this enough, mom.

Me [disguising a wasp's nest as a piñata]: Okay kid's time for some fun!

Maybe today's the day you walk into 7-11 and meet the most beautiful woman you've ever seen. You split a lottery ticket and win the Powerball together then you live happily ever after rescuing orphaned prairie dogs and traveling the world. Now get out there and make it happen

Just reported my coworker Patti's cheerful "good morning" greeting to HR as harassment.

Native ChocTalk Presents, S9, E7, Pt 2: Service with a Choctaw Heart: Veteran & Assistant Chief, Jack Austin, Jr. 🇺🇸 WATCH: https://t.co/GzDVEQkZfT Happy Veterans Day and yakoke, Veterans! #VeteransDay #AssistantChiefJackAustinJr @ItsLLBee

Native ChocTalk Presents, S9, E7, Pt 1: Service with a Choctaw Heart: Veteran & Assistant Chief, Jack Austin, Jr. 🇺🇸 WATCH: https://t.co/hSoYrmIjkv Happy Veterans Day and yakoke, Veterans! #VeteransDay #AssistantChiefJackAustinJr @ItsLLBee

The mystery of a teenager who vanished during a suburban eight-block walk. https://t.co/3I8NSRXXFE

This is Dash and he's 16 yrs old. I got to take care of this sweet guy over the weekend 💜

THREAD: Lots of us learned classical music from watching old cartoons, so I’m going to identify the pieces that frequently popped up. One of the most recognizable is Franz Liszt’s “Hungarian Rhapsody No. 2,” performed by those great piano virtuosos Bugs Bunny and Tom & Jerry.