I'm tweeting less as, like most comics and other narcissists, I'm spending more time creating online content. If you want to see more, please look me up on instagram where I'm @hcruttenden

Only just tuned in to see this game. Surely South Africa could have fielded a weakened side when an already struggling Wales have so many unavailable? I know it’s possible that South Africa just don’t have a weaker side but this slaughter isn’t of use to anyone… #WALvRSA

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Is it an apology for Brexit?

This was the Daily Mail’s 2016 take on Britain trapped in the EU and gazing at the freedom and prosperity outside.

What do we call them when they do Nazi salutes?

President @realDonaldTrump can make this happen and change the lives of millions of Americans with cancer. The Cancer Moonshot went nowhere with the past administration but could succeed with President Trump's decisive action today. AMERICAN FIRST.

I’m at a corporate event in a big London hotel. I got into the lift and am surrounded by Saudi Arabian army officers all in uniform. I jokingly said ‘Are we being invaded?’ Thankfully they laughed!!!😬

This is how authoritarians silence free speech - they terrify institutions into self censorship. We all need to be braver.

Farage gets quite tetchy when put under pressure. Looking forward to future interviews where he’s pressed on why he showed such love and support to the sex predator who’s President of the United States…

7th 5 star review of my tour show. Tickets at https://t.co/Sfz1ABqMr1 Review: HAL CRUTTENDEN: CAN DISH IT OUT BUT CAN’T TAKE IT, Leicester Square Theatre

🤣😂🤣😂

All of Europe needs to act as if we are at war with Russia. They are at war with us.

Don’t fall for it England. They pretended to be crap in the first half against Scotland as well… #ENGvArG

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you a much fatter, angrier, more corrupt Neville Chamberlain...

They’ve put Christmas vertically on this sign. They wouldn’t put Ramadan vertically or Diwali!!!! Those of us who believe Christmas is under attack, have trouble reading horizontally so this is an attack on our culture of stupidity. #christmashasfallen #londonhasfallen

What was once science fiction is now science fact, as over 100 labs work to crack the code that triggers human ageing. When—not if—they do, some will celebrate, while others warn it poses a greater risk to humankind than AI. My article about this was published in The European

📆 Wednesday: @Halcruttenden: Can Dish It Out But Can’t Take It, with support from @annarosethomas Hal is back with a brand-new tour for 2025 with a show that promises to stick it to ‘The Man’, as long as ‘The Man’ doesn’t stick it back to him Tickets 🎟 https://t.co/72n8BGDP24

A former U.K. Prime Minister urging a US President to bankrupt a British institution. Whatever you think of the BBC, Liz Truss is not a patriot.

Great performance!

When she was growing up, I showed my daughter that the correct response to an animal trapped in an enclosed space, is to run away screaming and crying. Very disappointed that she’s obviously learned nothing from her old dad!!! 😢

A lesson in patriotism 🤷🏻‍♀️ When the choice is between a foreign leader and our state funded broadcaster true patriots always choose the foreign populist leader who is threatening to sue the publicly funded BBC 🙄 Nothing says loyalty to your country stronger than supporting

The lovely thing about Liz Truss is that she gives hope to all the knuckle draggers here on X, that, if she can get to be Prime Minister, anyone can.

I say this, as a 22 year Army veteran, and in all sincerity, Farage is a fucking traitor and can go fuck himself.