grace spelman
@GraceSpelman
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writer, screenwriter and professional music discusser. subscribe to Grace Spelman Music Project at the link in bio š [email protected]
Joined September 2009
instead of texting āon my wayā Iām just going to start sending these
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itās my momās birthday. time to tweet the funniest thing sheās ever said
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Wow ALL of your ex girlfriends are crazy????? Thatās such a weird coincidence for you, man!! So weird how that happened for you.
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When this thing is all over Iām going into town and greeting every single person like Belle does in that song about the townspeople.
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thinking about how in 6 days there will be inescapable civil unrest
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guys from high school will message you on Facebook and be like āseems like youāre really killing it! congrats on killing itā.
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Sabrina Carpenter getting fake Eiffel Tower'd at her Paris show is just good physical comedy. It's plain old, good vaudeville/burlesque-y stage direction. It's kinda her thing and it's been so fun to watch! I'd be sad if she stopped doing it.
why does everything need a think piece nowā¦ can a girl get eiffel towered in peace??? whatever happened to FUN!.
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This weekend a 19 year old said to me, āI love when you say āthis rulesā or āthat rules.ā It makes you sound like a mom.ā So, just wanted to give everyone else a heads up.
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imagineā¦taking nap on a stone that is warm from wood stove. you WISH you could be this cozy. you wish
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Jon Hamm and I were set to have our beautiful wedding this April. However, due to the coronavirus, we will be postponing the celebration of our love. Iām heartbroken. My apologies to our friends and loved ones. Do not ask Jon about this heās busy.
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might fuck around and go on record saying āAmerican Boyā by Estelle is one of the greatest songs of the 2000s.
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The English language was invented so we could read sentences like this one.
Navy confirms UFO videos posted by Blink 182 rocker are real and should not have been released
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will even extend this out platonically and say that i think talking to a stranger in a tiny kitchen for over an hour is kind of what life is all about. and is one of the best parts about being alive.
blaming being single on that we simply do not have enough house parties anymore . what happened to all the house parties . where am I supposed to meet the love of my life if not in a tiny kitchen at a friend of a friendās house . we must bring them back effective immediately !!!!.
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obsessed with telling my boyfriend ābig dogā¦.you are motherā
what are posts that arenāt load-bearing anywhere but your personal lexicon. like the ones that werenāt really popular but are so enshrined in your mind that you just assume they got hundreds of thousands of likes.
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ready to admit that i swiped right on the blood guy on raya as a joke back in april and we matched.
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I am learning that being a pet owner is just staring at your animalās perfect face until you start crying
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I miss the old days when youād be in a gazebo with your boyfriend and heād be like āIām horny for you because you are sixteen and I feel like I am way older than youā and also he was a member of the Hitler Youth. I love musicals.
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me at 12 putting on my dadās shoes to take out the garbage
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Kids who grew up without cable: it is okay for us to grieve today.
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all celebrities go to comic-con so they can get their picture taken for their Wikipedia page.
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loling thinking about the first time I ever felt mushrooms kick in and how, 3 minutes after that moment, i would learn that Alec Baldwin had shot and killed someone.
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āBig yawn!ā - me to my cat when she yawns . āOooh big stretch!ā - me to my cat while sheās stretching.
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canāt stop saying this out loud to myself.
sabrina carpenter: so what's the joker?.barry keoghan: he's sart of like an evil porson.
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We werenāt meant to answer emails. It was just supposed to be hunting and gathering.
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I think one of the things we can all agree on is that my cat Soup was once just a very small guy
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well itās thanksgiving which means itās time to post one of my favorite photos from Elliott Erwitt
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love that this makes it look like they're doing a limited-run stage production at Hollywood Bowl.
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this is why we need to normalize having multiple boyfriends.
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reading this in Ke$ha āhot and dangerousā cadence.
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His fifteen minutes are up, but I will never forget the viral yodeling boy who looked like a Sim
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I get it. The book is cumming.
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hereās my impression of a man: ā6ā3āā because I guess thatās importantā.
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updating the troops with all lowercase helvetica heading
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loooove being reminded I'm in a media echo chamber. this morning I said to my boyfriend "okay so you know how everyone's been talking about the HBO show The Pitt?" and he was like "No, Grace, I don't think they have".
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Thinking about how my first ever Tinder date in 2014 ended with the guy texting me that night "I don't see you being someone I could ever love".
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happy motherās day.
itās my momās birthday. time to tweet the funniest thing sheās ever said
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best original score I know that's right
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just saw a woman drop her bag of chips and another woman walking by saw and said āOh no! Your chips!ā and the first woman went āNo! My chips!ā and then they both went āOh nooooooā in unison.
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me: gender is a social construct . me to my cat: Mr. Sir! You are just a little boy who is a man. Mr. Sir Boy!.
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the thrill you feel when your cat sits in a new location. nothing else like it.
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sometimes Iāll talk about cool houses I find on google street view and people will be like āwow you must have been pretty boredā and itās like no I was actually having a good time looking at cool houses on google street view.
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even if I get a wild rabbit disease I will die happy
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something my mom instilled in me at a very young age that helps enormously with this is: everyone is almost always thinking about themselves. no one is really paying attention to what you're doing.
i want advice from people that arenāt afraid to go out by themselves like i want to start going places alone like cafes and bookstores and whatever but anxiety says no. please tell me how you do it if you do.
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my dentist when he finds out how Iāve been opening nail polish bottles for 15 years
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this is one of thirty videos you'll probably see today, but this is the type of internet video that could sustain you for months in 2003.
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that scream is Bjƶrk starting her song.
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iāve never seen someone at the mic this allergic to the time signature.
BACKWOOD BRAT style is so unique yāall aināt seeing her š®āšØ
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Hi, itās me, the attractive girl who says āWhoa, that looks cool, what are you reading?ā to men I donāt know on the subway. I also say āHey, by the way, Iām 22 years old.ā
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maybe the real stocks is the class consciousness we learned along the way š.
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PUT YOUR PHONES AWAY!!!!!!!.
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How is it that you can buy a TV for $50 but every printer costs $400. Whatās going on with Big Printer.
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excited to announce Iāve been promoted to the CEO of Masturbating.
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itās canon that the 80s were twenty years ago and I wonāt be hearing any arguments about this.
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please can we just save this until later.
NASA scientists detect evidence of parallel universe where time runs backward
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BREAKING: Jason Derulo has fallen down the stairs at his polling location
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uhhh does anyone know where Pierogi went. a white little kitty. canāt find her anywhere
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[rolling over to my partner after sex] whoa microsoft just bought bethesda.
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@JaredLeto Thank you Jared. Weāre all struggling during this time. I donāt have the virus but I did have to read these tweets.
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last-minute halloween costume panicking. googling "slutty frasier".
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I'm not going to lie, a lot of u seem dedicated to being miserable.
something my mom instilled in me at a very young age that helps enormously with this is: everyone is almost always thinking about themselves. no one is really paying attention to what you're doing.
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I grew up in Massachusetts. Iāve suffered (I visited Boston). I paid my dues. Now please let me see Joe Kennedy cry tonight.
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Right now my nightly routine is to eat dinner, have an edible, sit down and do my jigsaw puzzle until I say āIām too high I canāt do this puzzle anymoreā then I go upstairs and get into bed and stare at my cat until start crying because I love her so much.
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can confirm it works
Apparently cats are all over your laptop when you're trying to work because they want to mirror your behaviour. My cat is relentlessly cuddly when I'm working so I thought I'd try something out. I got an old laptop to see if it would distract her from me AND LOOK IT WORKED
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Someone should make a movie about society because thereās so much going on in that area.
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Me in LA realizing Iāve accidentally sat in a coffee shop meant only for hot people
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smoking a blunt in my inflatable pool just like in the bible.
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All the DVD menus that have played in the background while I had sex.
What movie is and will forever be part of your romantic history?.
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Calling my cat āone of the best guys we have in the business right nowā.
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I knocked on over 500 doors for Bernie and during that time I saw lawn signs and bumper stickers for every single candidate except for Biden. Hmm do we think thatās good.
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Before I log off again. I need help finding my darn cat Pierogi. Thanks
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I have a feeling in a year or so, when we look at the damage that was done, people will deny that they ever went to a restaurant in July of 2020. But know that I will remember the pics you posted, I think youāre evil, & I will secretly hold it against you until I die :)
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He could fix this all right now and he chooses not to.
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Everyone is doing tweets posing with their college thesis but I didnāt go to college so hereās me working at the mall at Build-a-Bear. One time a kid having his birthday party named his bear āiPadā and all his friends had to sing happy birthday to iPad
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