Emily Hyland
@EKHyland
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In the game of life, God bats last.
State of Correlation≠Causation
Joined May 2014
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Pinned Tweet
Pastor: "I have nothing to hide."
Everyone inside church: 😍❤️😍❤️😍
Everyone outside church: 🤨👀🤨👀🤨
Pastor: "I'm the real victim here!"
Everyone inside church: 🥰❤️🥰❤️🥰
Everyone outside: 🤔🫠😬😮😵💫
Everyone outside to everyone inside: "Here. You might want these 🚩🚩🚩"
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I learned to put my hair in a ponytail & apply mascara at 17.
At 18yo a married co-worker would put his hands on my shoulders, ask me what I was wearing under my dress, & invite me to a nude hotspring.
To say I didn't have an f'ing CLUE how to handle this is an understatement.
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PSA: Don't work for your church. You can lose your job, your relationships, your faith community, and your place of worship in an instant.
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Re: RHE, JT, DW
A woman publicly critiquing the wrongful deeds of a male leader is the most serious sin in a patriarchal system.
There is no forgiveness, even in death.
Complementarianism demands one thing always: you never complain publicly about men.
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When is gossip not gossip? 🤔
When it is between two pastors.
Professional Christians w/ degrees & titles told me that.
They don't preach this but it is 100% what they believe when they get back to their offices.
Us talking about them = sin
Them talking about us = shepherding
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Getting someone to see that a pastor who seems kind to them can also be a bully to others is a challenge. It's more productive to assess the signals of bullying than to try to prove what they’ve never seen. Ex: what would it like to be the weed in this analogy?
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The Fatal Flaw of Complementarianism = Accountability.
The system of men policing each other or answering only to God allows abuse to root, grow up, thrive, and spread.
The patriarchy lets men write their own report cards while having women shoulder the consequences.
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Misogyny in women often shows as a reluctance to prioritize support for other women over maintaining approval from men.
So when a woman faces the choice of assisting another woman or preserving favor with a man/men, she opts for silence, despite her knowledge of the abuse.
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@johnnarae
Before I ever called a lawyer I sought to speak to the church elders about what was going on.
I was told officially "no"..... unless I would sign away my legal rights, agree to non-disparagement and confidentiality clauses.
To speak to them. An NDA to speak to my elders.
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False Equivalency sirens are going off! 🚨
Wildly abusive behaviors ≠ the slight imperfections we all have.
Same for husbands. Same for pastors.
But it's the complementarians who are pushing the fallacy that calling out abuse is a threat to the stability of marriage and church.
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This. I feel seen.
I have to go before a judge and present evidence of what those in church leadership already know: the open secret that women are doing vital work for no pay while men with full-time, benefited roles get paid for game night, movie night, s'mores night, etc.
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Attend church long enough and you can witness how people with Dark Triad traits (Machiavellianism, narcissism and psychopathy) can self-sponsor their way into positions of church leadership.
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@janefortruth
It's not like a girl's recognition of her agency just comes in the mail the day she turns 18. Or 16. Or 21.
Predators know how to destabilize people at any age and take advantage of that gap in time between thinking "wtf is going on" and "I should do something about it."
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We covered a lot of ground and went over tough stuff. Bullying sucks. Betrayal is worse.
What do you do when you’re being bullied by your Christian employer? Whistleblower Emily Hyland speaks out in this exclusive podcast
After exposing alleged bullying by pastor
@DaneOrtlund
, author of 'Gentle and Lowly,'
@EKHyland
shares what she's learned
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@johnnarae
I saw problems. Spoke up (privately). Was fired. Attempted to bring it to elders (privately). Was insulted.
They refused to listen.
Kinda sounds like a relevant Bible passage...
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A celebrity pastor has a coefficient of triangulation that is probably between 1000 to 100,000 times that of whoever he's abusing. That is the source of power and the reason why this problem of abusive leaders persists.
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The Model Apology: Church-Hurt Bystander Edition
"I’m sorry for how I acted. I was in the system that hurt you and abandoned you when you were down. I was a shitty friend and a lousy Christian by turning away from you when I should have been there for you. What can I do to help?"
I’ve worked with hundreds of folks over 25 years from all different stripes, backgrounds and faith traditions, and you know who has the hardest time with
@wademullen
’s great graphic below?
Christian leaders.
“Do you wish to rise? Begin by descending. You plan a tower that
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Ever said to yourself "I am a great judge of character and would know if someone was lying to me" 🤔
Congratulations!!
You are the prime candidate for being neck-deep in a toxic church under an abusive pastor and not even knowing it.
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Almost 25 years later I still clearly remember how it felt physically to be unable to speak or move in those interactions.
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Why might a male elder break ranks to defend the female victim of an abusive pastor?
A: He’s a man of courage who is modeling Christian integrity
B: He’s in an illicit relationship with her
One answer is what victims think, the other is what the pastor hopes people think.
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It's weird to look back at church involvement and think "Did I enjoy this place because it was good or because it was a cult?"
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Throwback to March 2021: I had already spoken to two elders about Dane. Dane had confronted me. I didn't know it but I was less than 24-hours from him firing me. I saw this quote in RMs book Courage to Stand...
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The Calculus of Narrative Control:
Lawyer (not on case) + Tweets (explanation not asked for) + Tagged account of celebrity pastor (with same publisher)
=
20k views, hundreds of likes, and multiple retweets by PCA pastors and Wheaton professors
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I'm stressing the public part because that is the dividing line.
Women at my church complained about the misogyny by the elders/pastor. Privately.
I learned the hard way that public denouncement for the same abuses becomes the closing chapter on your life in church community.
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How did I know what bullying in a ministry context looked like? Rewind one month to Feb 12, 2021. It was the day the RZ news went big. I read it and recognized the same behaviors. Especially the silent treatment for anyone asking questions...
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At church the door to CONFIRMATION BIAS swings both ways:
Things are going great = “God is for us b/c we are doing it right”
Things are going awful = “Satan is attacking us b/c we are doing it right”
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If you are a narcissist driven by a preoccupation to feel good about yourself, you can't find a better actual occupation than pastor.
People will make appts just to tell you their dark sins (which you of course do not have) & shameful secrets (which you now hold as useful cards.)
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Wanna know what else is shrill? A klaxon. A smoke detector. To be a whistleblower is to create a shrill sound that attracts attention. Emergency alert systems rely on this. To suggest that "shill = bad" is to keep people in danger despite the alarms going off around them.
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I have been called "disgruntled" so many times!
That label was all that was necessary to cast me as a villain and reframe Dane as The Hero Who Rid His Church of a Troublemaker.
Not facts. Just one word.
@DrMichaelLBrown
@ihopkc
@RZIMhq
"One form of retaliation is when leaders respond to exposure by misrepresenting truth-teller’s moral+ethical reasons for telling others, casting them as bitter & revengeful persons who are just spreading rumors"
@wademullen
to
@kateshellnutt
in
@CTmagazine
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Being fired was traumatic.
But my world fell apart at 4pm.
I sat out in my yard thinking "surely, someone will call and ask me what happened." Then it became "why hasn't a single co-worker reached out?"
It was because Dane told them to "give me space" or however he phrased it.
Mar 19, 2021: At lunch when Dane sends an email to meet in an hour with him & an elder.
1:30: Fired. Left w/ 2 pieces of mail,
@BethMooreLPM
open letter that I had highlighted &
@drmoore
Courage to Stand
2:00: Elder walks me out of the church
3:30 Dane informs staff of my firing
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@johnnarae
From my elders: "The meeting would be limited in time (no longer than 10 minutes), and you would have the opportunity to make whatever statement during that time as you see fit. You should not expect the meeting to include a dialogue, but you may speak freely."
10 minutes.
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Mar 19, 2021: At lunch when Dane sends an email to meet in an hour with him & an elder.
1:30: Fired. Left w/ 2 pieces of mail,
@BethMooreLPM
open letter that I had highlighted &
@drmoore
Courage to Stand
2:00: Elder walks me out of the church
3:30 Dane informs staff of my firing
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Interesting notion: Fight For Your Pastor.
Foreward by.... Dane Ortlund. 👀
"Pastors today have immense pressure on their shoulders and they need the support of their congregations."
You got that ya'll!?!
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Playing off the CS Lewis quote:
"The world does not need more Biblical counselors. What it needs is more Christians counselors with clinical qualifications."
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This is the language of the non-disparagement clause of the NDA I was offered when
#churchfired
by Dane Ortlund.
"The Individual agrees that she shall not make any disparaging statements regarding the Company or the Released Parties and shall not take any other action which....
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In an afternoon I learned that a pastor can cause hurt, know a person is in grief and yet speak words to prevent anyone from providing care and comfort. Christians will obey who they worship.
That awareness broke me more than anything.
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The two most powerful statements used by abusers (or allies) to undermine the credibility of victims?
"I didn't do it"
and
"There are facts you don't know"
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And Joe Rigney wrote a book on... *checks notes*....
No, sorry, this can't be right.
*technical pause"......
Okay, internet confirms he wrote a book on Courage.
Published by..... Crossway.
The teacher who literally wrote the book on logic at a classical Christian school grooms & assaults his student & the admin responds w/ the equivalent of “what was she wearing”
Wrap your head around that. Their whole school/church/cult is a literal advertisement for public school
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And really, does anyone want to be in a congregation where the pastor likens some of the people to weeds?
These people have names and faces and families but suddenly no church.
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This is entirely true. And the "bad decision" a woman makes can be simply expressing her concerns about pastoral misconduct to the wrong leader. Game Over for her.
Men and their wrongdoing, criminal or civil, will be protected by the church, leaders, and denomination.
Here’s the thing about being a woman in evangelical spaces - you’re constantly one bad decision away from losing your entire community.
Meanwhile, Evangelical men commit literal crimes and are still protected by the church.
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March 10, 2021: The day I called one elder on the phone and spoke to another in my office.
The subject was how Dane was treating me at work.
I went to elders first, before anyone else.
I spoke privately.
That was the last time I spoke to an elder at NPC.
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In my case an elder went to a friend's house to pump her for information about me, but when she asked him "what happened to Emily", she was told there are "things you don't know" and "its an HR matter so we can't say anything."
This is the game that they love to play - they claim to have some secret set of information that only they know that completely acquits the abuser no matter how guilty they appear to be, but they won't release that secret set of information.
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Misogyny is not a hatred of women.
At its core misogyny is a warping of a woman's 'beingness'. Men see her as human. Just not as a human 'being' in the same way men are. Men can promote a woman while still believing her fundamental purpose is to serve male interests.
Bill Hybels — like Stackhouse — encouraged women leaders and pastors, too. These stories baffle me further when the abuser is a public supporter of women. Thankful Crandall responded in Tov and truth.
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Just gonna leave this here...
Self-deprecation, just as much as grandiosity, concerns me when I see it in church leaders, because while the latter is fairly transparent, the former masks as humility but can be just as manipulative, just as desperate for adulation and approval.
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Scoring guide to see from a distance where a pastor is on the complementarian-egalitarian spectrum.
Did he quote, reference, or praise a woman in his sermon? 10 pts
Was it?
his wife: -10pts
his mom: -15pts
Elizabeth Elliott: -20pts
<0 = hard
0 = soft
>0 = egal
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In a single congregation just because one person was treated well doesn't negate the fact that another was torn from it.
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No goodbye. No well-wishes. No hugs.
14 years of life brought to an end so God could rescue me from toxic disciplining in a false gospel.
#BestDayofMyLife
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"Dechurching doesn’t happen to someone, as if people are passive spectators. Leaving the church is something people do."
Puh-LEEZ! I was physically escorted out of my church (Dane's idea) and not allowed to return without an elder chaperone.
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Gather round friends (and lurking victim police) and let us all learn from this masterful example of gaslighting. Go watch the movie if you aren’t familiar with how this effective method of psychological manipulation can make you question reality. 🧵
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Devastating is definitely the right word.
People at my church were told by Dane that how I was treated and my firing was "right before the Lord."
Great manipulation tactic but ultimately risky if you believe God cares about His name being hitched to wrongdoing.
It’s an added layer of devastation when a pastor or elder abuses in a Reformed church and gets away with it while the survivor is ostracized.
The teaching of “God is in control” turns God into the abuser.
No amount of “it’s for good” will work.
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What is true for scientists is true for abuse victims. What was done and said behind the closed doors of a pastor's office still happened regardless of the admissibility of the evidence in court. God sees. God hears. God moves.
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Want to know what the first words out of my mouth were when I reported Dane to my elders? "I'm seeing some risky behaviors..." By that I didn't mean I saw Dane skydiving.
But after seeing discussion about the terms guilty, innocent, and judgement I thought I'd share a 🧵
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Yes, we are aware that Jesus has a heart for the "outcast, scandalous, and foreigner."
The problem is that his church does not and keeps driving them from their midst.
I'm gonna guess that if I showed up at Immanuel Nashville they might not be thrilled. 🙄
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This isnt that hard to keep straight.
I made my complaints about DAAAANE.
When DAAAANE heard about the nature of the report DAAANE called up elders the next morning to have me fired.
The person who ended my employment at church and told me to my face was DAAAANE.
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You can employ a litmus test to discern if you're dealing with a bully. Pushing back against any of these tactics can reveal the person behind the statements. If you face consequences for asking questions or seeking clarity, it can be the indicator of the person's true character.
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Do female church staff members know that the sections of their employee handbooks covering discrimination and harassment know that those provisions only apply to staff without ministry duties? They should. Tell your friends.
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The irony is that Mohler
is telling the truth- "He finds it hard to believe" may be completely accurate if they were friends. Feelings-based. Fine.
But the deception comes in saying that thought out loud b/c it is now manipulating the feelings of others to doubt Presslers guilt.
"Mohler says he finds it hard to believe allegations against Pressler are true" Oh good night. This is what is wrong with the SBC.
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its Management and Released Parties shall not disparage the Individual and shall not take any other action which is designed to, intended to, or might have a detrimental effect on the Individual, her public image or her reputation."
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For the uninitiated: be cautious when addressing this type of questioning. People imagine what bullying/sexism/discrimination/abuse “ought” to look like and they are looking for your answers to match their preconceived notions of concepts they probably haven’t thought much on.
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is designed to, intended to, or might have a derimental effect on the business or operationsof the Company, its public image or reputation or its relations with customers, employees, vendors,investors, business associates, parent or the public. Likewise, the Company agrees that..
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"Love and Respect" has such a lovely sound to it but functionaly that ideology devolves into "Provide and Put Out."
A transactional debasing of the Imago Dei. A man's worth becomes what he can work & a woman's becomes her ability to please a man.
Performance-based relationship.
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@joyklaprade
Hilariously, when asked to compare Gentle and Lowly with the emails Dane wrote about me, AI concluded it was two different authors. Why? Because it couldn't find any Christian virtues displayed in his writings about me.
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Want to know what makes a victim feel seen?
Lawyers for your former church!
To you I say good morning and good day. 👋
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I'm a big fan of Paul Coughlin
@BullyingDefined
but didn't come across his work until 2022. Bullying in churches is very different than the kind we associate with schoolyards and other workplaces.
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The idea of being "above reproach" as it applies to
@TGC
:
Articles on pastoring: Legion
Articles on the church: As the stars of heaven in multitude
Financials showing how $ was used by their "pastors": Mystery of faith
Just because it's legal doesn't make it above reproach.
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Six elders knew Dane was going to have this meeting with me.
None of them were the least bit curious enough to ask me what was said.
This is what it looks like for a woman to have NO VOICE at her church despite 14 years of engagement, support, service and contributions.
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Let's bring back the word 'ensorcelled' when discussing church abuse. It means to be bewitched or enchanted. Whether it's tied to spiritual authority or celebrity, it's important to know that some may seem under a spell when you share your story.
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"What kind of revival would break out if thousands of churches threw their arms around their pastors in the way this book prescribes."
I think I'm gonna be sick. 🤮
Forget God, churches would do better if people were worshiping their pastor!
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@cnieuwhof
Denying justice to victims you never met seems to be arguably the worse position and ethically indefensible.
Who cares about church growth strategies?
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@BanjoAtheist
First: Deception... This included lies, untruths, equivocations, exaggerations, and concealments. A good thing to remember: not all liars are bullies, but all bullies are liars.
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Introducing the “PURITY & PEACE Drinking Game”! Take a sip every time an abuser (or ally) uses one of these words to dismiss, shame, ignore, redirect, downplay or dodge accountability related to the testimony of a victim.
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"I do not wish to speak ill of the dead, but..."
CLASSIC!!
A woman can DIE and still a man comes forward to get the final word in on how/why she was wrong. And other men will 👏👏👏.
Rachel Held Evans was one of the early leaders of the Twitter swarm: she would publicly critique (and often slander and misrepresent) the object of her ire, and the mob would do their job, as if on cue.
Doug Wilson was one of her targets.
Samuel James reflects here on the
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That the professional clerks, investigators, lawyers, and judges at the two state agencies dealing with employment believe there is SUBSTANTIAL EVIDENCE that his actions violated Title VII of the Civil Rights Act really sounds like, not good.
For any employer.
But for a pastor?!
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I found the original picture I took of that quote from the book. March 18, 2021. Dane had already called the elders and informed them I was being fired. 24 hours later he had me escorted out of the church building and 14 years of my life at that church ended.
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@jladamsbrown
I worked for the military and major tech companies. Never knew what an NDA was until being fired from Dane's church.
It was the first of many attempts to keep me from saying anything about what went on behind the scenes.
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This quote is true. My opinion at that moment in time was that Dane was bullying me. When I told elders about the treatment they helped Dane fire me. So was my opinion wrong?
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Which brings me back to the beginning. The only way to win is to not play. Churches and church members must solve this for themselves. The state is of little help to correcting what is corrupting our churches. The call is coming from inside the house...
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When is a red flag not a red flag?
When it is delivered with a hearty laugh.
Driscoll, Ortlund, Ramsey, Chandler, Wood....They have said the crazy part out loud but it was dismissed not because it wasn't true but because of the authenticity of their laughter.
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There are plenty of pastors, elders, denominational leaders, and ministry directors who's roles depend on not understanding the various manifestations of abuse at their churches.
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PCA: "Let's put on trial the victims and the ones who advocated for them"
Also PCA: "Let's not put on trial bullies, abusers, criminals, and adulterers."
This selection bias guarantees that proportionately more PCA elders/pastors will have significant issues.
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One Year Ago...
I was on the phone w/
@emlybelz
about the PCA's handling of pastoral abuse cases (10th Pres making this an annual event at this point) when I checked my mail to find a huge envelope from the IL Dept of Human Rights.
Substantial Evidence.
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March 17, 2021: First thing in the morning Dane requested a private meeting with me. The subject was what I had said to the elders a week earlier but mostly it was focused on why that route was wrong. It lasted an hour and afterwards I went to a classroom and cried for an hour.
March 16, 2021: Dane calls the 3 elders on the Personnel Committee and informs them he wants to fire me.
Elder I spoke to March 10 offers Dane help on my firing and the NDA.
Same day, same elder sends me an email about needing to model Matt 18 by going to meet with Dane alone.
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And that's assuming it is a good faith effort to understand a victim's experience.
Better to know this maxim by Upton Sinclair: "It is difficult to get a man to understand something, when his salary depends on his not understanding it"
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And this isn't just for churches. Parachurch organizations too. If it has a ministry, that huge gap in protection exists and disproportionately affects women.
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@marianneneal72
The fact that he was married played in my naivety about the situation. Surely a married man couldn't be suggesting what I thought he was suggesting?🤔
That only works on the young and pure of heart.
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A text I wrote from the week after being fired and shunned by friends, staff and elders...
"I never felt this sad. Like the kind of sad that takes everything"
Being fired was traumatic.
But my world fell apart at 4pm.
I sat out in my yard thinking "surely, someone will call and ask me what happened." Then it became "why hasn't a single co-worker reached out?"
It was because Dane told them to "give me space" or however he phrased it.
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Reminds me of the time two years ago when Dane spoke up in defense of Mark Driscoll... yet another author platformed by Crossway who made money blaming women for stuff.
Let me try: "Hey! Everything bad is the fault of women."
Okay, now how long until the book deals arrive?🤔
V. wealthy man who makes a lot of money selling books is extremely thankful for his very wealthy best friend who makes a lot of money selling books and thinks he is a great guy despite throwing a dead woman he despised under the bus in defense of another very wealthy book seller
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When I worked at NPC I only read TGC. Went to all their conferences. Did their bible studies & read their books. I had never heard of Julie Roys or Bob Smietana or outlets around church abuse.
Yet my diet of exclusively TGC wasnt enough to survive predation by one of their own.
The idea of being "above reproach" as it applies to
@TGC
:
Articles on pastoring: Legion
Articles on the church: As the stars of heaven in multitude
Financials showing how $ was used by their "pastors": Mystery of faith
Just because it's legal doesn't make it above reproach.
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I HAVE ARRIVED!!
For all my compatriots, what do I win? Does a certificate arrive in the mail? Is there somewhere I go to order my matching jacket?
#badgeofhonor
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Does anyone else find themselves wishing that 1 Timothy 3 had been specific enough to forbid church elders from adopting and propagating conspiracy theories?
I feel like that standard would be useful in these times.
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But it gets worse because a gap appears... The First Amendment contains the Establishment and Free Exercise clauses. This means the government will not entangle itself in legal matters regarding the hiring/management/firing of "ministerial" employees.
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But beyond this is the beautiful way the Bro Code is displayed.
As of last summer Matt claimed to not know Dane. Didn't stop him from bringing back up his RT from Aug.
Dane publicly thanked him last time for his involvement. I wonder what is on the line this time. 🤔
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Do a male pastor and a female children's ministry assistant have the same power? Same influence? Same pay or benefits? And if she reports the pastor for misconduct and he fires her? She has .RECOURSE.
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This session had me transfixed. Working for a celebrity Christian who turns out to be a fraud isn't a walk in the park! It messes with your heart, soul and mind very deeply. Carson is remarkable in his ability to articulate his journey. I appreciate him and his voice. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
What do you do when the spiritual leader you looked up to is exposed as a fraud? Can you recover from disillusionment?
For
@CarsonWeitnauer
his dream job working for Ravi Zacharias became a nightmare. Tune in for his story of betrayal trauma—& hanging on
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Wish I had read this article 3 years ago.
Narcissism like this doesn't just happen in pastors, it is being selected for in many churches.
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But getting to my situation and that of every other women I've heard from that was
#churchfired
... They weren't fired for belief differences. They were fired because the pastor wanted them out. But the law protects his actions is she has a ministry role.
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Deep at the heart of the Complementarian Galaxy is the Black Hole of Male Authority.
This dynamic fuels the motion of the patriarchal system… pulling individuals into its’ orbit & fixing them in a hierarchy centered around men all while lacking a means to hold men accountable.
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If I had the data I bet I could prove that the protections offered to churches/ministries through the 1st Amendment are disproportionately favorable to white men in leadership positions. But then again, who wrote the 1st Amendment 😀
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I did the math on the impact of Dane Ortlund's Title VII charges & Liberty U's Title IX violation on Evangelical credibility.
f(Dane^TitleVII(x3), LibertyU^TitleIX) = z
Solving for z, I calculate Evangelical credibility is rapidly approaching zero.
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