Carbosly
@Carbosly
Followers
25K
Following
31K
Media
2K
Statuses
28K
Mother. Lover. Wondering what happened to the cow in Twister.
Ottawa, Canada
Joined May 2009
I don't care about Disney lying about my Prince Charming. I'm more pissed about forest creatures and their unwillingness to clean my house.
25
2K
2K
Life is basically just stepping over puddles into bigger ones.
2
49
129
It’s becoming increasingly difficult to take photos of my teenagers. Here’s my son having a wonderful time on a canoe-camping trip.
1
0
11
Today I had a work altercation with a millennial. So now I have to buy her a Hallmark card that says "Sorry I asked you to do a job we hired you to do. Sending you positive vibes during this difficult time 🫶🏻"
5
6
60
This morning, someone sent me a fax. Someone at my head office received the fax, scanned it, saved it as a PDF, wrote me an email introducing said fax and added it as an attachment. Hooray for progress!!!
2
1
30
If now is not a good time to eat shitloads of gluten I don’t know what is.
2
2
20
getting v. tired of living inside an interesting part of next century's history textbooks
29
2K
12K
I don’t know who needs to hear this, but if you like to drive at the speed limit, the left lane isn’t for you. This lane is reserved for badass motherfuckers willing to die going to Walmart.
1
14
47
Renovating the basement and discovering where all the cat’s toys are at.
1
1
20
if i say to you “i’ll let you know” just go enjoy your day bro
146
30K
187K
My Sioux name would be "she who resets passwords every time she tries to log in".
1
5
43
Give a man a fish and he has food for a day. Also, he owes you $15,99. Bitch, do I look like a charity? That fish ain't free.
2
5
29
My VP texted me during his Mexico vacation. He couldn’t wait to share his newest find. Something that would revolutionize the way we do marketing. A QR code. That was his big discovery.
4
0
23
The woman in front of me is purchasing tampons, chocolate bars, pickles & a pregnancy test and I want to follow her home to see how it ends.
6
20
117
Can't wait to find out what kind of fancy moons 2022 has in store for us.
2
37
155
my uncle walked in to chistmas, filled a plate, ate in a separate room, and left. he was here 4 minutes
2K
18K
355K