TheBourbonFairy🥃🧚♀️
@Bourbon_Fairy
Followers
2,517
Following
270
Media
406
Statuses
4,926
🍑 LA face with an Oakland booty. 🥃🧚♀️ bourbon fairy. 💁🏼♀️ damaged but adorable. 🌶️ link in bio.
Ohio, USA
Joined September 2021
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Pinned Tweet
Happy titty Tuesday. I started an OF. Go see dem titties 👀
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If you don’t have some gray hairs, you’re too young to be in my DMs
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Wait…it’s
#RedheadAppreciationDay
and no one told me?! Guess I’ll just appreciate myself 💁🏼♀️
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stating to look my age, but at least my hair looks good
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Fall on top, summer on the bottom is the new southern mullet
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Was just called selfish because I said dating someone who would ask me to get rid of my dogs was a non-negotiable.
And this is why I like dogs more than people.
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To the dude in my DMs with 18 unanswered messages…may the odds be ever in your favor lil buddy
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Can I interest you in 2 weeks of flirtatious banter before you realize I’m a total shitshow and we go back to being strangers?
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idk who needs to hear this but my ass is missing 39 birthday spanks
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I’m 5’5” without heels, 5’9” with heels and 3’ if I really like you
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2011 2021 🍷
We should do a 10 year challenge and see who’s REALLY aged like fine wine 😂
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The real pandemic is how humans treat each other
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69ing is now 96ing bc thanks to inflation it costs more to eat out
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@_Golden_Gi
@sadbotonli
It’s be like having the season 1 cliffhanger at the end of episode 1
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QT w/ a pic of you wearing red ❤️
Fucking TRHOWBACK right here
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Since I looked so good today, I hit on myself earlier. It went well, turns out I’m a great flirt. Now I’m on a date with myself. Fingers crossed I get lucky later 🤞🏼🤞🏼
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You deserve that “let me feed you, give you tons or orgasms and not add to your emotional trauma” type of love
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Quote tweet with a full body pic & your height.
5’5” without heels 💁🏼♀️
Quote tweet with a full body pic and your height.
I'm 4'11 with big boobs, hips and a thick booty.
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Do guys who take dick pics on the toilet realize there are way better places
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Good news! Biopsy came back negative, no cancer!
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A guys dating profile saying “ex-college athlete” is the same as me saying “former size 4”
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Post a selfie from your gallery but turn it black & white 🖤🤍
Post a selfie from your gallery but turn it black & white 🖤🤍
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All I want for Christmas is the metabolism I had in high school
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Some guy at the bar legit thought I was 27.
I’m 39. These genes are what I’m thankful for. 💁🏼♀️
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And as its final “Fuck You”, 2021 had to go and take away a legend 🥺
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Could you date someone if they hated your favorite sex position and you hated theirs?
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It’s Tuesday, so I woke up early to play with my tits while looking at taco porn
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Kinda fucked up that all I want is someone to love and take care of yet I have such a hard time loving and taking care of myself
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Welp…
@RantingGAPeach
is no more.
That account turned into a real-time account of the worst years of my life. It also saved my sanity at times.
Time for a fresh start.
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Missing someone you haven’t even met yet is a mindfuck
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Why yes, I do have nice tits, thanks for noticing
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Do people who just DM “hey” know that there’s more words in the English language?
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Show and tell but it’s my bourbon cabinet, gun safe and sex toys
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That awkward moment when your hair stylists pulls at your hair a little and you accidentally moan “mmm harder”
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Added another tattoo to the collection on Friday
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I think I might have my first crush in a very long time and this is weird af
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I’d say naked in bed by 10p on a Saturday was a hell of a good night if it weren’t for the fact that I’m alone
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Haven’t been dominated in a while, so I’m at Target letting it tell me what to buy
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Idk who needs to hear this, but drink some damn water today ok?
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They put pineapple on their pizza 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
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not a damn clue how or when, but this exact spot will be home one day
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And redheads do both
They say blondes have more fun, but brunettes will do that thing you like.
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Good morning to everyone who doesn’t already have their Christmas tree up
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I just wanna cuddle in bed, watch Netflix and get high
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Not to brag but I’m the hottest bitch in this Taco Bell drive thru
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To the complete stranger who helped me 3.5 years ago as I was losing everything…I was able to make good on my promise to pay it forward one day tonight.
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I’m just a girl looking for her forever brunch date
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Sitting in the car alone in the store parking lot with music is the cheapest form of therapy
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I might not know how to flirt but I sure as hell know how to argue
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Would you put up a Christmas tree and decorations knowing no one will see it but you?
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Might go back to posting my ass on the internet out of boredom
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guys…what if Betty White is up in heaven about to take over and make things normal again
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Decided to move to Texas and suddenly my Diet Coke addiction has become a diet Dr Pepper addiction 😂
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72° in the winter is NOT the same as 72° in the summer
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getting real sick and tired of never being anyone’s first choice
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I like about 3 of you. Have fun guessing which 3.
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Might fuck around and get red wine drunk on the couch in my underwear
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@heeeramandi
He lovebombed you. He’s doing you a favor ghosting you this early on. Any explanation he would give likely won’t make sense or will somehow be your fault. Protect your peace. I’m sorry, I’m sure you’re hurting. 💔
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Knowing that being alone is better than being with the wrong person doesn’t make being alone any easier.
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Pray for me. 2nd cross country move in 15 months with 3 dogs.
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Having someone drop you off and pick you up from the airport is an underrated love language
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might watch the UK-LSU game naked in bed with nothing but my camo UK hat on
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Interviewer: So, tell me about yourself?
Me: Well…I have an LA face with an Oakland booty
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If you’re pro-2A but don’t practice proper gun safety, just realize you’re part of the problem
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That moment you switch the car radio to the classic rock station and hear a song from high school
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Saw a tweet the other day about how men are more attracted to women when they’re dressed casual.
Well I’m at the bar in Nike shorts, a Patagonia and a hat so where my fucking husband already?
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