Blake Hammond
@BigRadMachine
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comedian. writer for bob and tom. deleter of tweets I don’t like. first comedy special “Blake 182” out now!
Cincinnati
Joined April 2011
They say white people don’t have their own culture but I just got invited to a gender reveal party for a dog and there’s no way we appropriated that from anyone else.
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I found out my wife was cheating on me at a Red Hot Chili Peppers concert and I don’t ever wanna feel like I did that day.
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His scariest work yet!.
The Epstein client list is real. So is the Tooth Fairy and Santa Claus.
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July 4th is just Halloween for people who want to be a flag.
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“We’re not at war with Iran, we’re at war with Iran’s nuclear program” is the “I didn’t call you a bitch, I said you were acting like a bitch” of foreign policy.
WELKER: Is the United States now at war with Iran?. JD VANCE: No. We're not at war with Iran. We're at war with Iran's nuclear program.
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US Government: You have to pay back your loans. Japan and China: oh really?.
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RT @faceyouhate: I remember Conan O'Brien saying once that trying, or even wanting, to be cool is the death of comedy, and I think that's e….
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Kanye is about to defend Subway Jared isn’t he?.
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With how often planes are crashing, maybe he meant heaven?.
Morgan Wallen shares new post after his ‘SNL’ appearance where he left the stage during the credits:. “Get me to God’s country”
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Bitch, I’m playing parcheesi. I don’t know what that means either. At least it sounds more fun.
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If you say someone is playing 4d chess, you should have to explain what 4d chess is. Thats my subway take.
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“He’s playing 4D chess” Why? Because no one knows what the fuck he’s doing.
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The way things are going, Spirit airlines is about to win comeback player of the year.
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Hey I recorded a set for @donttellcomedy here’s a lil joke about my gay cousin. If you dig it please watch the full set below.
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