Describe yourself using three fictional characters

https://t.co/eLFPCuNSOw

I took an everything shower for the first time in probably 2 weeks and I feel like a new woman.

The cash tally just was emailed to me and actually I made more than DOUBLE from last week!!!

Last week, I didn’t do well at the craft bazaar. I decided to go back yesterday, rearrange some things and add some cheeky signs to my products to draw more attention. Today I’ve already sold slightly more items but most of them were the higher priced ones! Woohoo!

I’m working on a happy birthday banner to sell and it keeps getting more and more elaborate and by the time I’m done with it I’m going to have to charge $1,000

“MOMMY WHEN YOU WERE GONE WE WERE LOOKING AT CHRISTMAS PRESENTS FOR YOU. We got you makeup and pots!” Hubby’s voice in the distance: “WINNIE!! No we didn’t! We didn’t buy anything.”

One time Winnie was being a huge brat at breakfast but then she took one bite and goes, “🥰Mama! Dis is amazing! Can we pray?” And then folded her hands and closed her eyes and in the most sincere little voice prayed, “Dear God, thank you for this dishlish eggs sooo much!”

This is fine. My husband and I never fought until we got married and lived in a tiny, mold ridden guesthouse with rats in the walls and raccoons living under the porch.

I had to parallel park between a Porsche and a Genesis(?) and I don’t know what that is but it was the scariest 15 minutes of my life.

First Winnie won’t take a nap, now my tuna sandwich is tuna-less. My day is not going great.

You should give your wife the best Christmas present ever this year. A baby. They're incredibly fun to give as well.

I was making a tuna sandwich and I toasted the bread, chopped the pickles and onion, went to open the can of tuna and THERE WAS NO TUNA IN IT

Listening to @HauntedCosmos_, my husband was criticizing @tompawnbadil’s baby name idea “Psyche”. He said, “I just think having a KEY sound in a girls name is terrible.”

Screenshot my husband took on the Ring neighborhood app. “Does anyone know what animal this is on my door step? Looks like a half wolf/raccoon almost.”

At the Dressing-Table (the self-portrait), by Ukrainian painter Zinaida Serebryakova (1909). Tretyakov Gallery.

Grok says I should sell these for $19-$22 each. That sounds crazy to me. How much would you pay?

Seems like nobody can decide how many days to put on an advent calendar. 12? 24? 25? Which is it?

Winnie saw me drinking a Mountain Valley Spring Water and she looked at me really concerned, “Mama, what is that in your mouth?” “This? This is water.” “Oh,” visibly relieved, “I thought an old lady gave it to you and it was POISON.” ☠️

Winnie says that if we get to have another baby we should name him Buford. “What if it’s a girl?” “Uhhhhh. No, Buford is fine. She can be Buford.”

They didn’t turn out exactly how I imagined but it’s done so.