Daniel Bateman
@BatemanDan
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Margaritavillae tropicus. Common name: Dan. Habitat: Far North Queensland reefs and rainforests. Characterised by: Jimmy Buffet music, Hawaiian shirt & puns.
Cairns
Joined February 2011
OK, I’ve now seen @gomeztheband more than any band live, and after all these years these blokes are always amazing. Awesome reworking of classics (LOVED what they did with Get Miles) and some quality new stuff. Regretted not getting some Handbags tunes to takeaway.
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Nearly 12 months after Cairns’ emergency messaging system failed spectacularly in the wake of Cyclone Jasper, looks like still nothing has been fixed. Thankfully this is a false alarm
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A chocolate teapot would be quite delicious if it were used for brewing matcha and you drank it quickly.
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There are already independent audits of reef science. It's call "science".
Today I stood with renowned marine scientist Dr. Peter Ridd calling for immediate action on the unnecessary red tape surrounding the GBR. We would like to see the Qld Gov conduct independent audits of reef science, which has been flawed for years. https://t.co/IGryRreKM0
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Houndini 🪄🐾
Every now and then my “pun a day” calendar absolutely delivers 🪄🐶
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Arisa was born in Cairns so I did this for the Post when she was selected for the Paris Olympics. What little champion.
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The mayor of Townsville is in a bit of strife after exaggerating his military service and uni qualifications.
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Easily the most funny Aussie movie I have watched in years. Get it up ya! https://t.co/eb0lzggimm
jimschembri.com
Looking for something: An aimless writer searches for stability in the comedy ‘Hot Mess’. HOT MESS **** (76 minutes) MA In one of the most [...]
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No longer able to rent movies from Telstra’s streaming service without a separate set top box. Hey @Telstra, stop trying to make Fetch happen!
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Every now and then my “pun a day” calendar absolutely delivers 🪄🐶
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The day has finally arrived: the Great CD Extinction Event is currently underway at JB Hi Fi.
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Hey @10NewsFirstQLD your mid-commercial news updates in Cairns are 💩. Top story tonight is apparently “a giant of Cairns business has died”. That’s it. No name, no details, no nothing. Regional Australia deserves a better televised news service. @ABCmediawatch
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The message is simple: don’t be a moron during The Big Wet. So many lives at risk - and not just these idiots - from stupid decisions.
Natural selection at its best. Also the reason our swift water team are so busy during the monsoon #cairns
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I'm creating an "OnlyDans," where Dans get together to complain about being called "Dan the man, Daniel-san" and "Danny Boy" our whole lives.
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A Royal Commission into why smoke alarms only chirp at 2am when their batteries are low
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Tough day today. 90 per cent of our possessions are out on the street kerb waiting to be taken to the dump. We have one last trip to our flood-stricken home to clean up then we say goodbye for at least 12 months while everything is torn down and (hopefully) rebuilt. #Cairnsflood
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This is NOT the attitude of fellow flood victims I have spoken to in my suburb of Holloways Beach. Many are traumatised and desperate for physical and emotional assistance. Sure, this bloke is funny but please don’t think everyone affected by the #FNQflood is fine. We need help.
A North Queensland resident, and quite possibly the most Australian man of all time, has summed up the She'll Be Right attitude flood affected residents have been gamely carrying with them though the disaster. In a moment captured on film that's already garnering widespread
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FLOODED & NOT FORGETTING: always check the fine print on insurance policies and on updates to your policy that are sent through. We thought we had top notch cover from @RACQOfficial for our vehicle that went underwater in #cairnsflooding We were wrong.
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Dare you to read through this without a dry eye 🥲
Cairns Post flood edition is free of charge today. Read all about devastation brought by the 100 year flood event and how our community has rallied behind those in need. #Cairnsflood #Barronriver
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