Ized Uanikhehi | Growth | Data | Magic
@zegbua
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Growth King, Storyteller, Founder @Zediinc @sendmercuryuk @HireFoster , Convener @DigiClanAfrica , Ex @CNNAfrica . Don't Litter #JustBinIt #ArsenalFC #Outlaws
Nigeria, Africa
Joined October 2009
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Of all the things I have learnt on Twitter, this has got to be the most important one.
Buy economy, upgrade to Business Class at the airport just before boarding closes. 😁😁
Can’t remember who I picked it up from but God bless you!
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My friend is literally moving from 500k Naira monthly to $15k monthly.
Casually.
This is not a boast, my head is good, my prayers dey work.
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I talked to someone who started dating his girlfriend because she covered his food at a wedding event, he was a groom’s man & he was eating then got called, when he got back to the table, the lady had covered his food.
And that was it, the only inspiration he needed.
I cornered a couple of male friends to actually tell me the reason and circumstances that led to their cohabitation or marriage.
I discovered men marry for the most ‘stupid’ but important reasons.
Here are some.
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The new design intern came into my office yesterday to ask if there was an opening for an additional intern - his friend.
I told him we don’t really take Secondary school graduate interns,
The only reason we took him is because his mum put in a good word.
He looked at me weird
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Random how social media saved my life moment.
In 2017, I did a post on Facebook about craving ice-cubes.
Someone said it was a symptom of anaemia.
I went to check it out, my PCV was so low, I had to be treated.
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Yesterday, I had 3 meetings, went for counseling, shopped for clothes, Fixed my hair, spoke at a webinar in the middle of a photoshoot.
Today, I got married, went to the office, closed an 80+m deal, then sipped & painted & went for my wedding dinner.
Yes, happy BIWD to me! 🤩😁
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Hello Spar,
I hope they didn’t take all the trash bags? A group of us want to come and help clean up tomorrow Saturday morning as soon as the curfew is lifted.
Thank you for standing by us ;) and for understanding.
Guys, if you can, let’s meet at Spar tomorrow and help clean.
Rebuilding a supermarket is hard. Rebuilding a nation is even harder. We stand with you Nigeria.
Stay focused. Be the solution.
#sparnigeria
#staystrong
#sparstrong
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It was 2009/10, I was a few days away from being homeless.
I needed 800k to complete my Abuja rent, pitch court estate, jabi- airport road, I was working on something.
If it panned out, my rent would be paid, I’d have extras for Faaji.
Everything was set in motion & I prayed
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DonJazzy dey pick his own calls. Davido dey pick his own calls.
You blow small blow now, hit 100k followers, sign your first ambassador deal, you give your number to manager, call e no pick, text/email e no reply.
You go find us for front. That one na sure banker.
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I keep thinking about the guy who left his phone at home, strolled to buy Noodles at the Mallam down the street and was arrested.
For 2 months? Or more actually, his family searched for him, finally got word home, they found him in the police cell.
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An (embarrassing & outrageously) large number of us are Biochemist, Microbiologist and Biologist at this office doing digital marketing
🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️😭😭🙆🏾♀️🙆🏾♀️
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Pulling my son out of school this term, we’ll travel across Africa & everywhere the green passport allows us to, doing 6-7 days each time living as cheaply as we can, working in the day times (school work & Zedi) & touring in the evenings.
I’ll meet founders, VCs, learn & speak.
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Something old,
Something new,
Something borrowed,
Something blue…
Today I did. 💍👰🏾♀️
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In a world where you can be anything,
Be the guy that ends the meeting on time.
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Not Nigerian founders building apps & thinking because they know what a word means everyone else does. 😭😭
I am stuck on payment page for 15 minutes confused as fvck because someone decided to write “pay with FIAT” & yet is targeting mass market.
I thought Fiat was a car sef.
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Debo actually did me the real life version of “enter your akant number” today…
Glucose patriarch!!!
@mrmacaronii
😍😍😍
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Unity Schools cut off marks for 2022 for each state..
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Just random thoughts.
Every time I see “missing person” I think to myself “Have they searched all the police station and cells in Lagos?”
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I can’t explain it, it’s the random upgrade to Business class, it’s random people praying for me.
It’s friends asking me to send account details, it’s the Landlady of the new office we just paid for saying our rent is valid an extra year.
Things work for me. Doors open.
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Hiring a facility manager for my home was a really smart move.
All the light bulbs work, all the ACs work. No leaky taps, the small 8KVa gen is fixed. The Big one works fine.
Progress!
See someone needs to start Facility Manager as a service because 50k monthly well spent!
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“When 2 people love each other so much & they sleep together (no details), their love connects & joins together and forms a baby.
A baby is made out of love & you were the best of them made out of mummy & daddy’s love.”
Na so I talk my own oh. In case you need pointers. 😁😁
Nobody:
Tari at 6.45am: Did you cry when my daddy cut your stomach and put me inside?
Me: Nobody cut my stomach
Tari: … so how did I enter inside?
… Omo wetin be this one o.
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To be fair, it doesn’t always pan out, but even the Nos, I have also learnt to trust.
God does come through. I should know, I have stories for days.
I like to step aside these days & say, “Okay, let’s do it your way”
It is exceedingly, abundantly above all my imagined plans.
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Can’t help but notice the similarities between PO’s campaign now & Buhari’s campaign of 2015.
The energy, vibe, the “Nigerian savior” texts, the speed & willingness to attack & insult anyone who speaks up with questions or uncertainties.
It’s giving PTSD.
Pls don’t insult me🙏🏾
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My word for you this April is pray completely.
No half & half prayers.
Don’t just pray for a husband, give God your specs, tell him when you want your first child.
Don’t just pray for a Job, be definite, place, when, salary details.
Pray complete!
Be detailed. God hears you.
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Some of the interns work…
Turns out “Uncle” Emeka
@Clive_7_3
, the Art Director is an amazing mentor.
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Woke up 5:30am this morning, got ready and rushed to the bus park, 7 hours and 13 check points (yes, I counted) later...
I'd like to say it was absolutely worth it.
#VisitingDay
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Guess who is Mummy to best student in Mathematics in Edo State?
Yup yup! 😁😁😁
Papi came first in Edo State Mathematics competition.
On to defend the state in the Nationals now.
My chest is tight, yet swelling with pride. This visiting day will be lit!!
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The US saw/heard something that spooked them so bad, they closed embassies, issued a red alert warning & are evacuating their people.
Something is going on that is being downplayed, & I don’t know why I get the feeling that Nigerians should be at alert & ready for whatever now.
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Guysss!
*shudders*
They just rushed a boy to the emergency in UBTH, he stole and his father tied him to a tree as punishment. Cows were passing, saw the boy and gored him.
Now the father is crying here.
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People can’t ruin what they don’t know.
Take it from a recovering oversharer.
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Pls help me to tell an early stage founder, that we have worked it out so that for only $500/month, they get an entire marketing team:
-Strategist
-Graphics Designer
-Content Writer /Community Manager
- digital ads
- other roles on demand.
Full team Shared with 2 other startups
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With a 3bedroom in Wuse Zone 7.
A much better & bigger space. (And a Kia Rio, that tiny one).
I have reminisced sometimes over that issue & realized God had answered my prayers bigger & better than I expected.
Yet I was angry with him over 1 bed shared space in pitchcourt.
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You don’t want to know what I said when it didn’t come through. 🙈🙈
So now, when things don’t work how I WANT them to work these days, as sad (or angry) as I get, I like to trust (because I have a few case studies) that perhaps God is answering it different.
Bigger & Better…
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Someone who spoke up on our Twitter space
#HorribleBosses
is being threatened that they will be sued, although this person was not the only one that spoke up directly and anonymously about the company.
She needs legal representation in Abuja, if you can help, please DM. Thanks.
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GUYSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!
I got the job!!!!
Chief Marketing Officer of
@TORAAfrica
with major equity too!!!
Praise God for me please!!!!! 😎🎉🎉🎈💰💰🎶
Just thinking that TORA lowkey never gave me employment letter.
I am interviewing myself for the post of CMO today, wish me luck guys, pray for me, the salary is 6 figures. I need this job!!! 🤞🏾🤞🏾
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I want to do something for 10/20 young ladies from this month.
- PR campaigns, press features in local & international platforms.
- Global speaking opportunities.
- Branding campaigns + awards
Know ladies doing great in their chosen field but not getting their flowers, tag ‘em.
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Intern sent the email and said “Dear mom, my idea…”
I responded - my name is Ized or you can refer to me as CEO, please take note for subsequent emails.
There has been no response.
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You know what we should totally disrupt?
Cancer,
Treating Cancer in Africa.
My mom fought hard, many times we thought she won. I am actually happy that she is no longer in pain. 🙂
Thank you guys so much for your messages, I am so overwhelmed but very grateful.
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Yesterday, the intern excitedly comes to my office and said “Mum!!Uncle Emeka approved my designs for Zedintro!” 🎉
I said the Art Director is not your father or mother’s brother, you will refer to him as Mr. Emeka.
& my name is Ized, besides, share your status updates with HR.
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Just thinking of genuine “men friendships,”
When my mum was alive & battling cancer, anytime she’d need blood, my brothers friends in Abuja were promptly there, full clinic, gisting & laughing & teasing each other.
It was never forced, everyone was happy to do their bit. 😍😍
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Intern came into my room this morning and said I have an idea for HireFoster and I said “Staff cannot be seen in the CEO’s bedroom, kindly leave and about the idea, please send an email & make sure to copy HR”
He shook his head, but he complied and he left.
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I asked the intern to come up with a campaign slogan or tagline for Zedi..
He thought about it for a minute & said:
“A cat has 9 lives,
Your STARTUP doesn’t,
Get Zedi”
Hian! Na wa oh.
What do you guys think??
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And yes to
@3CrownsMilk
and their horrible advert that year.
Singing "don't you wish your mummy was hot like this??"
When my son said "yes, Mummy, I wish you were hot like that."
Sigh.
I still don't like that ad, but thank you for the wake up call. Hope you are happy now??
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Pulled a scary career move, launched Zedi, UK Branch, last week & some.
We signed our first “test” client this evening… 1 down,
Found an already furnished good office space I really like in Birmingham (ready at end of February).
God Abeg 🙏🏾 - Make e dey go smooth.
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Someone asked me today how do I work with GenZs, More than half my team is Genz.
I actually find them very decent people, creative, expressive & respectful.
No issues so far, I think GenZ follow established work culture & move mad only if you move mad with them.
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The universe did it’s thing!
I am going to DC!!!!
Thank you J! 🙏🏾 🙏🏾
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Wow. You kept this. 7 years? You are weird. Good weird but weird nonetheless. ❤️❤️
I think I was writing my future self though. Ized - Take your own advice!
As a junior strategist
I sent in a terrible done strategy doc
It was so bad,she called me and said sit down, what's the problem?
I told her about how someone talked down my relationship at the time and it got to me
I got home and found she slipped a note in my bag
I kept it❤❤
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Wait!
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14% interest on any amount in Fixed Deposit?
On top of that- no bank charges, no daily stampduty charges, no SMS charge & still 14%??
@vbankng
ma pa mi naaa!
Take all my kobo kobo!
I'm not arguing again. Take it oh!!
#SwitchToV
#Vbankng
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Look at how far I have come...
Fammmmmmmm!!!
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Family is who has got your back, years and years, regardless of how many times you see in a year and where Life takes you..
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Balloons...
Happy birthday Z.
You are still my 2nd favouritest person in the whole wide world.. right after Papi.
Keep keeping on.
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When he gave his testimony in Church, I couldn’t help thinking that why was he so grateful... so much time spent in cell for a crime he didn’t commit and he said “at least he came out alive”
Last I heard he was very involved in prison ministry & raising funds for legal support.
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Currently for startups in Africa, accessing the level of marketing expertise they desire requires them paying huge amounts on retainers & this does not include actual campaign fees.
I am in the industry, I have seen good startups die a marketing death & not for bad execution too
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Or was it the guy from my Abuja Church that went (by himself!) to the station to report his missing laptop. Couple of slaps later, he was arrested for Murder & taken to Mararaba station, for months nobody knew his whereabouts.
Until someone agreed to help him reach the church.
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@Akumneri
@sinzubaba
I love it!! It will go round 😊
As long as you don’t come on Twitter to cry when it reaches your turn… 😉😂
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I wrote this in 2018.
It is very valid
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This is a shout out to my favourite person in the whole world.
Sexy Mama!
Ized Nwa Mama.
Took you 22months girl but you finally made good on your goals.(95kg)
143kg to 92.6kg.
You coulda stopped at 105, or 100.. but you did it!
I am so proud to be you!
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So these flip cash guys entered my DM, promising to double my cash in 24 hours, I asked for a number..
Called the number, explained to them that I really needed money but the only money I had was salary money, about 1.3m.
A thread...
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- Started Zedi in March.
- Hit just over 100m in revenue (no receivables) in 9 months.
- Worked with 63 startups. (In different capacities)
- 28 member team, (3 countries, 5 cities).
- Buried my mum (didn’t break)
- Survived 2022
EVERYONE INCLUDED :: Please brag to me about a thing you did in 2022 that you’re proud of.
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Half God.
Half Ized.
The King is a woman. 😉
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Before you have an opinion on that Deeper Life School video, watch the full thing on Facebook, that boy was sodomized, and raped (the Senior boys made him swallow their sperm) and then threatened with Death.
That school should be shut down very fast! Forever.
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I grew up hearing from my mum about how she wanted to act as a young girl but her father was against it and so she abandoned it the plans..
And now she really wants to try.
So this is me pushing it out to the universe, and film makers casting for Grandma roles, can we audition?
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Sarah's pregnancy was a miracle, still it took 9 months just like any other. God's plans does not negate the importance of process.
Wait!
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In spite of who is in power, we will prosper.
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Nothing irks me quite like founders that want their staff to carry the company on their head from day one & get mad when it’s not the case.
You are the one who had a vision.
It’s your dream.
It’s your name on the papers.
They are there for the money/ salary.
Until it’s worth it
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What I learnt:
Emotions (feelings), are fleeting, it changes throughout the day with your moods, even your physiological state,
For example, hunger can make you anxious or angry.
Always. Always pause before you allow your emotion CONTROL your behavior.
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See what we are arguing about this morning…
What is your answer?
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If you don't have a job.. or you are just generally confused about next steps in your proposed industry.
Download an event app.
Go for the events that concern you.
Learn. Network. Ask questions.
You will be inspired.
You will come across opportunities.
You will make friends.
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Intern just ran upstairs & shared an idea with me, he thinks it’s really unique.
I think so too, but it’s something that has been done before, I hesitate but I tell him.
He’s disappointed, so now I have to tell him about 2nd mover advantage, & how ideas are a dime a dozen,
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Recruited (and still recruiting) and training a large batch of female Okada riders.
Not trying to start something but tbvvvvh, women riders are so much easier (faster) to train and get in formation, they are more mindful of safety and road signs.
I am so proud of these ones.
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This Oxlade kulosa challenge is actually one of the best challenges ever, because you have to stream the video on YouTube more than a few times to get the dance & a few more times to do the challenge.
Brilliant in my opinion, to be very honest.
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Lines fall for me in pleasant places,
Always have.. no be today.
Thank you so much dear,
I will always be grateful.
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Sent a picture to a tailor for my trad wedding outfit, she gave me cost, I paid in full, found out before my wedding that it was for my trad, she was so angry.
Talmabout, I don’t charge that amount for bridal wears. I should have told her. 😊
Did I pay you in full or not??
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If you can write & you are looking to transition to tech.
Learn UI writing.
Layer it with a cert. in Conversion Rate Optimization.
Progress with SEO writing & content marketing.
Do 30days of content on the TL & show people how they can optimize their website content
#ZediAfrica
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A man that cannot change his mind, cannot change anything else.
Thank you
@GRVlagos
for making the key decision to run as your own man.
LP top to bottom!!!!
So Gbadebo Rhodes was a member of the PDP and was meant to run as deputy governor to Jandor. Wow!!!!
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Probably two of the hardest tests in life...
1. The patience to wait for the right moment and
2. The courage to accept you may have waited for NOTHING.
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What’s your favorite go to Bible verse/ Bible promise?
Please share.
I could do with a pick me up.
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Meanwhile na money we wan give you oh.
Na deal we bring come.
Manager pick call now, mba!
We dey front.
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I am going to NY film academy...
It just hit me.
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(I am the Storm)
The longer I live, the more I realize that nobody really gets wealthy “by accident”.
Forces of poverty are stronger than luck or accident.
You keep going against that force as an African. A lot of us succumb. Few survive.
~Victor Osaretin Asemota
@asemota
2017
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I trusted God wouldn’t want me & my baby to be homeless na.
Jehovah Jireh, my provider, I trusted him dieee! So I wasn’t worried after I prayed.
However, deal fell through, I was shook, a few days to homelessness & the God that answereth by fire wasn’t my God????!!
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Hey Guys, Mr. Emeka Nelson, has created an electric generator powered by Water..
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