RT @zachbdunn: Less talk about Austin Butler, more talk about my awesome butler. Barnaby (if you’re reading this) just know that you are….

RT @zachbdunn: Not sure why everyone's suddenly talking about 30 Rock but this is prob my favorite TV scene of all time .

Join millions who have switched to Grok.

I kinda feel like this past year has been the biggest year in Hawk Tuah history.

NBA players have so much power. If you do something cool enough you can make Lenny Kravitz and Ben Stiller hug.

There should be a UCB for music. And instead of the UCB Four it should be the four Beatles.

Horse sequel just dropped six years later

Can ANYONE explain to me (in legal terms) why these Miyazaki AI pictures of me being a good father don't count as admissible evidence in my daughter's custody hearing?.

I don't like when people joke around about a green item of clothing by saying something like "Did you steal that shirt from Shrek?" . Shrek is green, yes, but he doesn't wear green clothes. He wears a brown cropped peasant's vest top over a beige tunic

Went all out with the Oscar snacks this year!

RT @BenStiller: I remember wondering how this actor was able to be so present— I mean actually be present. Like, how did he actually get th….

(Blue checkmark accounts the last two days) David Lynch. what is to be said about this incredible artist of film? He made movies that were weird and/or strange but that may have potentially inspired Inception and he possessed grey hair. Rest on.

RT @realhoopermovie: from the bootleg stream of the cavs-thunder

Here in LA, when times get tough, we take care of each other. It’s kind of our thing. And you know what else is kind of our thing? The new Bacon Cajun Ranch McCrispy at McDonalds. The perfect mix of crunchy and tangy, you’ll be saying “I’m Lovin’ It” with every bite. Dig in, LA!

Water isn’t for putting out wildfires. It’s for powering a machine that lets me hear what it would sound like if Cartman read my grandpa’s will.

WHAT WE DO IN THE SHADOWS series finale tonight at 10- watch live if you can!. Working on this show for the last five years has been an incredible experience, but ultimately it’s become clear that vampires are not something to joke around about. They are too scary. Thanks.

I do stuff like this all the time but I guess since I’m not a beaver nobody gives a fuck.

(speaking way too loud to movie theater usher 15 minutes after Wicked ended) Yeah I mean if you think about it all this shit’s just happening in some Kansan chick’s dream, but if these rubes wanna eat up that slop then who am I to judge lol. Btw when does your shift end.

“Follow me over to blue sky” bro you sound like a cloud.

Hey Hollywood? 👋. You do realize that by revealing Santa’s secret code name (Red One), you’re not only putting Santa in danger, you’re also threatening the safety of Mrs. Claus. And, oh right, the elves. But no. Go ahead. Make your movie. Make your money. That’s what matters 👍

I’m gonna start donating money directly to Jon Bon Jovi. Cut out the middle man.