Otto Von Biz Markie
@wittgenfine
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Lost in the Funhouse
Twitter dot com
Joined November 2019
Made a website. It's an archive of my writing and a small library of content from better writers who I enjoy. https://t.co/zGf6f0VSlE
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You almost have to admire the misogyny of the gay guys in the fashion industry. The average dude will make some dumb “woman am I right?” joke when he’s alone with his boys but he would never think put you in credit card debt so you could perform foot binding torture on yourself.
Men will never understand the pain we go through everyday just to look good for them🥲🥲
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Thinking about the time Fitzgerald made Hemingway give him a penis inspection then took him to the louvre to reassure him. He also taught him about “angles” and the difference between showers and growers.Male friendship truly is the most powerful and beautiful thing in the world
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When she tells me I’m tall I feel like I’m a NepilHIM
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Bitches be putting ancient curses on your bloodline just because you didn’t take them to the farmers market one time
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Hitting chest every day until I find a mousy brunette wife who nags me. Affirm.
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“She wasn’t like the other girls she bought her Lana Del Rey record and the 3 other miscellaneous vinyls she owns from a real record store not the front of the urban outfitters like you other basic bitches”
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Big non commital doesn’t want you to know about no takesies backsies
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Don’t let a white boy rock a little LL bean on these hoes
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Enjoying Mashed potatoes while being serenaded by the spirited high iq intellectual debate about macron’s wife’s penis. Doesn’t get better than this.
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How grandpap looks at you after asking if the “jungle monkey” is joining us for Thanksgiving dinner (referring to my brothers girlfriend because she is half Irish)
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Reaching out to YouTube to let them know that sometimes they accidentally play the video I clicked on in between ads.
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“Just 6 more months till AGI takes every job. I know we’ve been saying this for two years but this time we mean it. Just 6 more months bro I swear. 6 more months till super intelligence bro I swear. 6 more months till everyone is unemployed bro”
ELON MUSK: IF YOUR JOB INVOLVES MOVING ATOMS, YOU’RE SAFE. IF IT INVOLVES MOVING DIGITS, AI IS TAKING OVER LIKE LIGHTNING "AI is really still digital. Ultimately, AI can improve the productivity of humans who do things with their hands Literally welding, electrical work,
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It’s easy to make fun of people in HR or people with mfas or a degree in gender studies but your average SWE may be lower than all of them. Just tasteless retards destined to make todo lists forever
Signs you're at a nerd event: When the dinner options are formatted in JSON...😂
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Modern air travel is essentially a giant Rube Goldberg machine where you overpay to be raped at each stage of the process. How people dress at the airport is very low on my list on how to fix this problem.
DRESS FOR SUCCESS: Transportation @SecDuffy has a message for Americans: Stop wearing pajamas on planes.
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Guy who says religion is a 2000 year old scam to control the unwashed sheeple yet believe Joe Rogan has decoded the esoteric secrets of the Anunnaki, the pyramids are spaceships that run on crystal harmonics, and that DMT elves are not only real but ancestral 5D spirit guides.”
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