[ MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY ]
The ghouls are currently planning their Halloween costumes. Aether wants to be hello kitty. Cumulus wants to be draculaura. Papa wants them all to shut the fuck up.
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
Papas entire body is sore from last nights throw. He has taken multiple ice baths today and the Ghoulettes have been making him soup. He didn’t even throw the ball that far.
[ MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY ]
Aether has started a blog where he cyberbullies transphobes. So far, he has made 4 grown men cry. The clergy is very proud of him!
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
We no longer support blasphemous music such as "Mary on a Cross".
Please await our new album "Jesus is Lord" which will be coming out on November 31st.
[ MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY ]
The clergy is wishing a very happy birthday to a man who reminds us a lot of Swiss. We believe his name is Justin. Cool dude.
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
The ghouls have been playing a game of Monopoly for three hours. Swiss' fists are clenched and Mountain hasn't blinked in 30 minutes.
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
We wish to inform yoAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
We wish to inform you that mountain has started a one man band. He plays drums, kazoo, tambourine, and cowbell all at the same time.
[ MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY ]
Papa Emeritus IV has just won a free cruise ! Due to the lack of service ( and open bar ) he will not be available until tomorrow. Hasta la vista !
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
iamsickofstartingmytweetswith“messagefromtheclergy”.iwanttobemyownperson.withmyownthoughts. IamnotliketheseotherGhouls. Iwanttobe freetosharemyownopinionsandfeelings. IDONOTWANTTOSPEAKFORTHESEPEOPLE.HELPME.
[ MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY ]
Swiss has purchased a party sized bag of dum-dum lollipops. Sodo said if he can finish it all in one night, he'll give him 20 bucks.
He's halfway done.
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
Papa has lost $800 at the Casino .. he has only been there for 2 hours. He will spend the rest of the cruise crying in his cabin.
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
Copia fell down in the shower. Instead of calling for help, he's decided to lay there in protest.
If you wish to see Ghost in 2023 you must come to Copia's bathroom.
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
We wish to inform you that Sunshine and Rain have torn down Terzo's statue and replaced it with a life sized figure of Hatsune Miku.
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
ATTENTION ALL GHOULS AND CHURCH STAFF MEMBERS! EVACUATE THE ABBEY IMMEDIATELY! I REPEAT! EVACUATE THE ABBEY IMMEDIATELY! THIS IS A CODE RED! PAPA HAS FARTED! FIND THE NEAREST EXIT AND LEAVE NOW!
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
We wish to inform you that hi can i get a venti iced chai with pumpkin spice .. and uhh oatmilk.. yeah. do you have the tomato mozzarella sandwich… can i have one of those?? yeah that’ll be all. $8.75? okay thank you, have a great day.
[ MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY ]
Here's my face reveal...
I'm ugly, right ? Lol... no one will ever love me. It's ok if you want to leave.... girls never stay :/
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
Rain has recently started watching "Stranger Things".
Swiss and Cirrus keep flickering the lights and playing clock noises whenever he's alone. He won't leave his room anymore.
[ MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY ]
The ghouls just saw Phantom of the Opera on Broadway. They had to be escorted out because 5/8 ghouls started crying halfway through.
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
Whoever is the owner of a white tricycle… you’re parked illegally. Please move it at your earliest convenience to avoid getting a ticket. Thank You.
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
A Nameless Ghoul has been staring out the window with his hand pressed up against the glass ever since it started raining. I wonder what he’s thinking about.
Nihil a bitch bc if i had a woman as fine as sister imperator it would have to take a new world order, an alien invasion and several natural disasters for me to even consider being apart from her. That’s just me though.
/ A Nameless Ghoul
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
We wish to inform you that there is currently a ghoul facedown in the bathtub .. if this is your ghoul please come claim it.
Thank You.
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
Am I the asshole? I, 41 M, told my papa, 56 M, that he looks stupid in his new hat. I think I'm in the right, but my roommate, 34 F, slapped me for saying it. So, AITA ?
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
It is 8:30 AM and Papa is making the Ghouls cook breakfast Hell’s kitchen style.
Mountain was the first to quit after Papa threw his pancakes and said, “DICKHEAD IN HIS GRAVE COULD DO BETTER!!”
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
Papa has started a bake sale! He is saving money for a new hat 🥰
He also won't tell us what he put in the muffins. It's "surprise" flavor.
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
On Halloween, Aether discovered Banana Laffy Taffy in his trick-or-treat bag.
Last night, there was an anonymous purchase of $200 worth of this candy from Amazon. Using the church’s card.
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
We wish to inform you that our newest album "Imperá" was nominated for best Latin Rock Album at the Grammys! ¡Felicidades papa!
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
Many of you have seen the video of Papa running off stage last night in near tears. Do not worry, he was just remembering the end of Coco. The Ghouls made him watch it the other day.
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
Hey it's me papa emeritus iv from the band ghost I need $5,000 venmoed to ghoulsodomizerreal in order to break me out of prison so I can perform in 2023. Mary on a Mary on a cross
[MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]
We wish to inform you that we will be disbanding. We have come together as a group and decided that Papa Emeritus IV's run has gone on to far too long. We thank you for your support. Why are you still reading this? Do you want to kiss me? Make out?