bri ꩜
@ufobri
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having guy friends is crazy bc i was crying and they told me “lock in” and i did.
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high school is funny bc u think it’s important then u graduate and ur like wtf was that.
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me auditioning as seaweed in the little mermaid just to be near harry
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i’ll never forget the trauma this caused me the first time i watched had the whole theatre screaming and crying like their own family was being murdered in front of them
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girls who do their makeup and get dressed up for class everyday are so strong thank you for serving our country.
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i might be stupid but at least i never spent money on a high school class ring.
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cramps? hurting. pussy? bleeding. 👋 . \ 😳. || \_. _/¯ ¯\_. at least i’m not? pregnant. 😜. 👊/||\_ . _/¯ ¯\_.
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every time i go out in public wearing an oversized t-shirt everyone asks “are you wearing shorts under?!?” like no debra i thought today would be a good day to have my Bare Pussy out at walmart.
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if i didn’t spend $20 on that meal 3 years ago i would be $20 richer right now
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mom can u pick me up? they’re asking what i’m gonna do with my degree i’m scared.
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hot girls have problems too 💔 we’re just like u 😔 except we’re hot ❤️.
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i was born in the wrong era i wanna go back to 1692 and get murdered for being a witch 😍.
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men will fuck a mcchicken.
i make his dick hard even when i’m fully clothed, no makeup on 🥵 we not the same sis 🤣💯.
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i was too insecure to ever get up and sharpen my pencil i would legit get anxiety even thinking of going up
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UR TELLING ME. THE PRINCE I HAD THE BIGGEST CRUSH ON WHEN I WAS SMALL. MIGHT BE PLAYED BY. AS IF IM EMOTIONALLY MENTALLY PHYSICALLY SPIRITUALLY STABLE ENOUGH.
Go on and kiss the girl, @Harry_Styles. The singer-turned-actor is in early negotiations to play Prince Eric in #Disney’s live-action remake of #TheLittleMermaid
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as a girlfriend i offer u nothing except sending u pics of two animals together and saying “us <3”.
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me when i go out of my way to take nudes to send to my bf and he replies “nice” but i remember 3 years ago when we weren’t even together he commented a whole essay on a random insta girl’s pic
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when u can still see the moon during the day it’s like omg queen what are u doing here.
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medusa WASN’T a monster she was raped by poseidon and then blamed for her own rape by athena who then turned her into a gorgon as punishment the real monsters are poseidon and athena thx for coming to my ted talk.
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me when i find a new song to overplay for weeks until i’m sick of it
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u know when ur makeup is coming out bad and u feel shitty about urself and ur whole entire life bc ur eyeliner looks stupid
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went through a pandemic and now a recession all before i hit my 30s
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i remember before my one direction concerts i would shave my whole body n be like “just in case 😌” JUST IN CASE WHAT BITCH?!! U WERE 15.
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bought heart effect glasses for fireworks and this was the outcome hehe
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love when someone i’ve never met or spoken to adds me to their close friends i will take ur secrets to my grave.
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i get scared when my bf starts acting like a guy and locks in to the sports game on tv like where did my baby girl pookie bear go.
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didn’t think my parents would let me but i put liam on there rightfully
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i miss when i would only listen to marina and the diamonds, the 1975, lana del rey, & one direction and watch american horror story and scroll on tumblr all day. life will never be that simple ever again.
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I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT HOW PPL THOUGHT THIS WAS PIRATE MUSIC BUT ITS ONE DIRECTION SHSJSUAH FUCK
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it's always girls with shitty eyebrows who say the most racist shit
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i was already mad then here comes a cybertruck pulling up near me just to piss me off more.
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people are like “you get over things quick” first of all i unhealthily repress all my trauma.
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laying in bed with ur water bottle beside u is an underrated form of intimacy.
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when i’m out having a good time then a wave of feeling ugly hits out of nowhere
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i don’t make the rules but the funniest people are either gay, have daddy issues, or had a shitty childhood.
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girls who ignore their friends when they have a bf but talk to them only when they’re having relationship problems are so. ugly.
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today in class i heard someone say “my husband” and i was like ??? and then i was like oh yeah i forgot i’m an adult adult now.
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blows my mind ppl think sexuality is a choice as if anyone would willingly be attracted to men.
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me acting sober around my family bc if i start acting up they won’t let me drink more
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band kid this, theatre kid that. what about the people who didn’t do shit? just went home after school and straight Vibed.
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bella where the hell have u been loca? welcome to burger king can i interest u in the twilight meal
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if i call myself ugly i’m not fishing for compliments let me hate myself in peace.
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why is my brain a constant cycle of “i used to be prettier” and then a few months pass by and i’m like “i used to be prettier” and then a few months pass by and.
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a woman shouldnt have to be raped in order for u to think its ok for her to have an abortion. not wanting to be pregnant is enough. not wanting a baby is enough. sayin “if u cant afford a baby dont have sex” doesnt make sense & shows u just want to shame ppl. mind ur own business.
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why are there instagram pages dedicated to posting screenshots of tweets when you could just. go on twitter.
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i like my men a little fruity a little questionable a little sussy.
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girls just want ONE thing and it’s to never have to do math ever again.
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everyone personally messaging me rn like i lost a family member and i’m just…. um??? hmmm….
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my bf reminded me to go pee after we fucked i’ve never felt more loved.
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boys have naturally long thick curled eyelashes and for what huh? FOR WHAT.
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i think customers should just stop and wait for me and my coworkers to finish our little girly chit chat before disturbing us.
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not to be a slut but i really want someone to hold my hand and do the little thumb thing right now.
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why’s everyone going to halloween parties this weekend i thought they were all next weekend
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imagine all the cute outfits i COULD wear if i wasn’t so FUCKING insecure.
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girls who are naturally pretty. what’s it like being 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 privileged.
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when i say "men ain't shit" ryan and shane from buzzfeed unsolved aren't apart of that.
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my last braincell using all its power to finish my homework that’s due at midnight
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