Dr. Tyler Lemco
@tlemco
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I host a talk show, a stand up show, and make art @avseriousshow @bustyscomedy
Montreal, Canada
Joined January 2010
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LeBron James just said they won "against all odds". I'd say being a 6'9" 265 pound athletic freak of nature gives you pretty solid odds.
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That awkward moment when you try to start a food fight by throwing a sandwich but the guy just catches it and says "thanks for the sandwich"
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In Happy Gilmore, he starts golfing to pay for his grandmas house. But then, when Shooter offers him the house in exchange for quitting golf, he decides, instead, to learn how to golf properly and beat Shooter in a high stakes wager. An idiotic decision that cost Chubbs his life.
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When I die, scatter me across my ex's front lawn. Also, don't cremate me.
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For my parent's 40th wedding anniversary, I decided to re-create the Vibe cover of Death Row Records.
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Draymond Green Vs. Steven Adams. Hell In A Cell. Wrestlemania 33. Do I have to think of everything??
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Someone tell me why Rob Lowe looks like he has 100,000 SoundCloud followers and produces fire remixes
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I can't believe "strap on" backwards is "no parts" that's literally the most ironic thing in the world.
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How do I buy all the champagne currently sitting in the Golden State locker room on the cheap right now?
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Reverse Wet Willy: Dig your finger into your own ear and then shove it in someone's mouth.
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I wonder if the NBA will hear me out and change game 7. Sunday nights are for Game Of Thrones.
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How many frozen pizzas is a good amount for a wedding gift?
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The closest I get to feeling like Steph Curry is when I pay with exact change at a drive-thru.
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CrossFit pretty much has the opposite rules of Fight Club.
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When you've had too much to drink but your friends still wanna party so you just shut it down on the spot
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This is 21-year old NFL rookie A'Shawn Robinson. He was born in 1995.
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Tyronn Lue looks like the result of a bad Disney movie where a kid has to coach an NBA team.
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I made a shirt out of the entire script of the Seinfeld Soup Nazi episode.
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Tim Duncan is my favorite player ever. My second favorite is Tim Duncan's corpse we're currently watching.
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Giggling to myself while the DJ plays "Who Let The Dogs Out" in a club full of ugly girls.
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My biggest sexual fantasy involves sweatpants and Netflix and no sex.
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This is a Chinese Water Deer and it's a real animal that exists and also I love it more than anything
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If you buy one-ply toilet paper for your home then you have zero respect for yourself or the people you love and I don't respect you either.
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How much Wu could a Wu Tang Clan if a Wu Tang could Clan Wu.
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LeBron James walks into a bar... Just kidding he never shows up.
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@TheLoveBel0w
In a weird way the Epstein thing because yes it became a widespread meme but the story behind the meme got lost in the shuffle and holy shit that’s a wild one
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I don't appreciate how "Netflix & chill" has become code for hooking up like maybe I just wanna watch Planet Earth without any expectations.
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I’m gonna tell my kids this is Tracy Morgan, Dave Chappelle, Eddie Murphy, and Chris Rock because my child better fucking know about them.
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When you're chilling with you're friend and the drugs start to kick in.
http://t.co/brpJ899imh
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Retweet if you're really attractive, Favorite if you're really ugly.
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Montreal the only place where you can hit a pothole that turns off your check engine light
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Getting back into the music production game. This track about to be fiiiiiiiiire 🔥🔥🔥
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Tell me how Rihanna's gonna make a song using one word and get it stuck in my head for three months.
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i want a girl in sweatpants and no makeup and thick crust and cheese and pepperoni and wait i just want pizza.
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This math exam needa get its mind outta the gutter and focus on the numbers and equations.
http://t.co/8xnAwBu21U
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New drinking game: I'm going to drink every time I see Zac Efron. For the rest of my life. Whenever I see him. Wherever I am.
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Doctor: What seems to be the problem?
Me: Knees weak.
Doctor: Anything else?
Me: Arms spaghetti.
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"Yeah, um, that's EXACTLY what I was trying to figure out. Yup. Definitely." - Guy who discovered milk.
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It's actually pretty simple: either you're for racism or you're against racism. And if your stance is "I'm not racist, but these protests have to stop" then I'm genuinely sorry to inform you that you've chosen to be for racism.
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And now, Romney slowly walks back into the ocean, only to re-surface once his mega deathray is complete.
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I anonymously asked Xbox user Tyler Lemco if he was the real Tyler Lemco...
http://t.co/kFAp3equI2
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an app like google maps but it only shows you where dogs are playing
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