The Lemon Press
@thelemonpress
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The University of York’s best (and only) satire magazine
York, England
Joined September 2009
Darcy Graham is the new sports officer. No Lemon Press member has ever participated in a sporting event.
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Sam Dickinson is the new Community and Wellbeing officer. He is thanking many many people
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Abi Harrison is the new equality and inclusion officer! Apologies I have been relegated behind Finn’s head so all photos will now be 10% more dutch.
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We have sighted Pierrick Roger. We are trying to contain our excitement, but failing.
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KBZ wins. We continue to have very little pertinent analysis to add
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Aya Haidar is the new Academic Officer. We can’t think of anything funny to say
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Something inexplicable and satanic is happening to this balloon
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Almost ready… we are within touching/jeering distance of the stage
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We are reviving this account briefly to tell you that we are well and truly PUMPED for this York SU election results night. At least one of us even voted in this thing, that’s how dedicated we are. We may or may not bring you live coverage depending on whether we remember ❤️.
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Oh hello.
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As one esteemed UoY institution leaves Twitter, another returns! We've officially passed Elon's age-verification checks, which should hopefully quell the usual complaints that our magazine is "too childish".
Right, we're off. 🔚 Why and where we're going: 🟩 Library Status page: 📸 Insta: 📱 Tiktok: ⤵️ Twitter nostalgia: see thread below. Thanks all, it's been great. ❤️.
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This result will come as a shock to many. Only the Greens did better than expected in our MRP poll yesterday, winning seven-tenths of an MP instead of the predicted two-fifths. Reform performed as expected, matching their predicted 66.6 seats. @Keir_Starmer declined to comment.
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Our exit poll is in! An unprecedented number of write-in ballots is expected to return the Rory Stewart Hedgehog Party as the largest party, meaning that either @RoryStewartUK or a hedgehog will be our next prime minister. Keir Starmer declined to comment.
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Less than four hours until polls close. Make your vote count! And make sure to come back here at 10pm and see the results of our very own exit poll. #election.
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That's it for our pre-election coverage. Don't forget to vote (and bring your voter ID), and we'll see you here at 10pm for the release of TLP's Exit Poll!.
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For those who are interested, here are the results of our MRP poll:
@ReformParty_UK are second with 66.6 seats with Ed Davey's @LibDems a close 3rd with 66 seats. Of the smaller parties, @UKLabour has 6 and the SNP 2, while the Greens are predicted to lose a whopping 0.6 seats leaving them with a measly two-fifths of an MP.
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