This account no longer posts every hour because Elon Musk limited the API to 16 or so posts a day. It now posts every other hour. If you want an hourly time check with swears - then you'll need to go a website run by someone who isn't a prick.

Hurry Up In There, I Really Need A Shit It's 12:00PM

Your Granny Gave Your Grandpa A Blowie In A Morris Minor. It's 10:00AM

Fanny Fart The National Anthem It's 8:00AM

Slice Off Your Cock And Put It Under Your Pillow In The Vain Hope You'll Get £50,000 From The Cock Fairy It's 6:00AM

Nail A Huge Shit To Your Front Door Bell To Discourage Unsolicited Callers It's 4:00AM

Well, Lick My Haemorrhoids. It's 2:00AM

Give Meghan Markle's Muff A Sparkle It's 12:00AM

Hickory Dickory Fuck My Shitty Arse It's 10:00PM

Lick My Love Pump It's 8:00PM

Tit Gravy It's 6:00PM

Everybody Shake Your Stuff. Gaz Neville's Here To Blast Your Muff It's 4:00PM

Everyone Thinks You Vote Tory It's 2:00PM

Hairy Dick Tits! It's 3:00 It's 12:00PM

Put Your Mummy's Bra On It's 10:00AM

Shit On My Dick It's 8:00AM

Larry Grayson Slipping My Balls Into A Vice It's 6:00AM

On The Third Stroke, I Always Cum. It's 4:00AM

Buy Your Own Fucking Clock You Cunt It's 2:00AM

Front-Bottom Frottage Fun It's 12:00AM

May Your Breasts Warm Your Armpits Whilst Laying Down It's 10:00PM