Ted Lasso season 4 idea: .An English football manager comes over to lead the White Sox after a historically terrible season.

Nobody:.Men’s swim trunk designers:

What do you want to know?.

We need a Google Maps option to filter out reviews made by British tourists. These wankers give 5 stars to pretty much every tourist-trap restaurant and skew all results towards expensive mediocrity!.

“You planted a fig tree in my hearth���. Fast-growing, hearty, and planted by birds in nooks & crevices, their roots cause cracks in masonry as they grow. Also, they’re notoriously hard to kill. Thus, to plant a fig tree in one’s garden is to sow the seeds of one’s destruction.

Recently learned that fig trees — which I always enjoyed seeing in random places — are viewed as a kind of curse in Turkey. The Turkish phrase “Ocağıma incir ağacı diktin” roughly translates to . (1/2)

Happy May the fourth

Now that Yellow Pages & printed phone directories are obsolete, I guess there’s no more incentive to name your business AAAAAA Locksmith or AAAAA Plumbing?.

This is how I imagine @AJamesMcCarthy reacts every time he goes out to take another amazing shot of the moon.

In the midst of a long layover at YYZ, one starts to contemplate a maple syrup purchase.

. @StubHub has a major bug with a "Sign in with Apple" private email. After a purchase, the seller can't send you the tix!. Doesn't help that you're in rush due to their countdown timer. A CS rep said it's a common issue & wished they got rid of the feature altogether #pleasefix.

It's crazy how good Dalle has gotten in the past year. Here's “Photo of a sad banana playing an old guitar”. a year ago: today:

To be fair, this bread does look absolutely incredible!.

My wife: “You need to eat less bread”. Also my wife:

Just unlocked a new circle of hell and it’s trying to gain access to my own @CashApp account.

Was helping 4th graders with math today and they all came to me asking “What’s an mp3 player?” . So I asked them to sit around the campfire and started telling them about Napster, the Metallica lawsuit, Winamp, Kazaa, the Rio, the iPod, …. Then they asked if inches would work

Been struggling with a slow MacBook for months (slow to unlock, random reboots) and turns out it’s just too many open tabs on Google Chrome this whole time.

My favorite part of swim trunks is the sandpaper speedo they’ve sewn inside.

Lobster font is the new Comic Sans #lobsterfont

Shish kebab skewers are fun because you get to choose between eating burned veggies or eating raw meat.

Thanks to the new @Apple Vision Pro, my 731 open browser tabs can now live directly on my eyeballs!.