Simon Holland
@simoncholland
Followers
161K
Following
79K
Media
604
Statuses
20K
I didn't realize I was supposed to know how to do everything by my second rodeo. That's still a very low number of rodeos.
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Generate videos in just a few seconds. Try Grok Imagine, free for a limited time.
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Of course I look tired. I have 2 teenage daughters so we all had to stay up until 12:12 last night.
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I love summer but come August I start thinking about feeling cozy.
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My teenage daughter asked me to try the best drink she ever had in her life from one of those drive through coffee shops. It tasted like electric candy spit. 🤢.
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Thoughts and prayers appreciated for my teenage daughters. Their chicken was too chickeny tonight.
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Serious talk around the house about going from a Tide family to a Gain family. This stage of life is so exciting, I will keep you posted.
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Just dumped the crock pot dinner into the trash because we thought this time might be different lol.
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Saw a video saying the new Apple update would rock the technology world and then showed how apps are going from square to round on the Home Screen.
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Heard someone talking about the turn of the century and they meant 1999 not 1899. Ouch.
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I will stop pretending it’s fall when it goes back to 90° on Friday but for now I’m holding my coffee with both hands and wearing flannel.
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It’s 67° in Georgia today and I know what people in my town are thinking but pumpkin patches aren’t even open yet.
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I hate when I find an awesome show called Shark Power Unleashed and it’s just an infomercial for a vacuum.
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Why choose between dumb and selfish when you can be both?. -people in the school drop off / pickup lines during the first week of school.
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School started today in my town which means drop off and pickup lines are back and it appears everyone ate a bowl of stupid for breakfast.
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Are restaurants having secret contests to see how fast they can clear the plates off of tables? I’m clearly still eating, so no, you may not take my plate.
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Daughter is home from college and wants to know if we want to go do something at 9 PM. Uh, we don’t do that here.
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The person who told you the trampoline bunny video was fake is a fun sponge.
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AI made this picture of my dogs and I just wanted to show someone
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Airlines are like: sorry we said you could bring a suitcase and you brought a suitcase. We don’t actually have room for your suitcase.
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If you are getting a Brita pitcher for your daughter’s freshman dorm, I can sell you the one my daughter never took out of the box last year.
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