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NurseBrianRN Profile
NurseBrianRN

@rn_murse

Followers
18,893
Following
829
Media
3,169
Statuses
48,580

Singer-Songscreamer I Gay Homosexual I Pubic Figure | Fourth Thing

Brooklyn, NY
Joined May 2020
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 months
kiss me under the purely decorative popeye’s balcony, so i know it’s real
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
coach: show no mercy! show them that we’re killers! KILLERS!!! me (as pictured bottom center):
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
art surrounds us
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
found it.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
5 months
babe, what’s wrong? you’ve barely tried to kiss me under the mistletoasters.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
title of my senior honors thesis
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
i don’t wanna
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
7 months
the moment i found out i’m actually an 86 year old woman:
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
season’s greetings
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
6 months
working title of my senior honors thesis
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
5 months
watching a lot of documentaries about cults. mostly to find the one that’s right for me.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
8 months
happy to report this will be a dad joke account in 2024:
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 months
no one: my mom at a museum:
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
some dark shit went down in subway yesterday
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
1 year
my patient wanted to take a “selfie” w/ me today. i only spent a shift w/ her, but she said, “i knew from the moment you walked in, you were different. you spoke to me with your heart. you made my day.” and she made mine.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
mrs. vaughn got called out on her shit
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
me. scrolling to my birth year like…
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
She has a name. Geeez.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
6 months
some dark shit went down in subway yesterday
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
Kohl’s is fucking brutal.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
great business strategy
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
fuuuuuuck
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 months
al dante. my specialty.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
this can’t be a good sign
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
29 days
forgot to leave a plate of dirt out for earth last night.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
finally found a place that’s right for me:
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
1 month
me in 1980 doing jack shit instead of saving for a home
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 months
keep reaching for the fuckin’ stars, billy.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
mine came for free. from my mom.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
Someone is about to fuck Jesus’s shit up today in the parking lot.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
19 days
need someone to feed me Doritos while i read, so i don’t mess up the pages. no weirdos.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
27 days
stayed up until 4am watching a documentary on the horrors of sleep deprivation.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
1 month
if you don’t have homemade, store-bought is fine.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
three stages of grief.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 months
the perfect job does not exi—
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
i prefer her line of stickers and backpacks—soooooo
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
no one: my mom at a museum:
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
5 months
if the baby jesus sees his shadow, it’s six more weeks of Happy Hondadays
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 months
meta
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
4 months
we did it!
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
fuck this shit! i’m gonna be a swan, bitches!
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
a valid response, molly.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
the perfect job does not exi…
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
6 months
challenge accepted
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
challenge accepted.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 months
don’t mind if i do.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
young man…
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
6 months
never a good sign
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
Me, once the pandemic ends.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
4 months
marrying my boyfriend of 11 years today. no joke. just love. ❤️
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
I only select the freshest, most organic produce. To slowly rot in my veggie drawer each week.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
My library’s Mystery section does not play.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
if ever
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
totally not a portal to an underworld ruled by sleep paralysis demons
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
In the suburban ecosystem, the landscape is represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: Lazy ass homeowners and the people who mow their lawns. These are their stories.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
cum, celebrate the season
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
5 months
i’m with fuckin’ Daniel L. on this one:
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
1 month
buying a black goldfish. naming him swim shady.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 months
“i was raised catholic” is how i start my trauma narrative
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
My pharmacist just gets me.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
i can be good at a job or i can pass a drug test. i cannot do both.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
I prefer his cousin—Boom
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
the labor shortage has really fucked us all.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
25 days
i said, stress free, motherfuckers!!!! on the ground now!!!
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
just left a huge legacy in there
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
the vase is tired of your shit
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
suddenly, a hole was ripped into the time-space continuum at my local Panera
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
Actually, we’re all out of cock. Is penis, ok?
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
4 months
hello, clarice
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
18 days
hmmmm. sounds like something a fuckin’ croc would write.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
Freeze motherfuckers! Stop doing fractions!!!
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
The purge begins at 6:01pm, bitches!
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
24 days
fuck yeah, gravy hot tub tonight, bitches!
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 months
me, apologizing:
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
fuck. this Target is brutal.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
epic fucking battle this sunday
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
also, my tinder bio
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
I would like to come to this event.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
Still thinking about the time I came out to my dad whose response was, “don’t worry, son; everyone’s experimented in college...everyone.” WHO THE FUCK IS COMING OUT TO WHOM HERE, DAD!? WHO!?
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
ten years of therapy. same.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
my sandwich could get it
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
ok, fuck.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
patent pending
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
Jesus, Halls! I’m not that kind of lady.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
breakfast in England be like
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
1 year
getting in the spirit
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
you better not pout, mf, or else.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 months
the best valentine’s gift doesn’t exis—
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
mcdonald’s wants to get all pregnant and shit.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
got kicked out of Applebee’s…again
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
garbage day in my ‘hood does not fuck around.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
NJ fucking hates Tim.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
thanks. mostly freaked the fuck out.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
4 years
I hope they pick Morgan Freeman to narrate the end of the world.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
don’t mind if I do.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
they make a compelling argument
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
2 years
keep reaching for the stars, kid:
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
i just can’t get out of bread this morning.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
3 years
For when you fucking hate your cat.
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@rn_murse
NurseBrianRN
6 months
totally not a portal to an underworld ruled by sleep paralysis demons
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