Jonathan Rigsby - Your Rideshare Driver
@ride_trips
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Rideshare driver and father. Author of Drive: Scraping by in Uber's America, out now! Find your copy at
Tallahassee, FL
Joined February 2019
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Pinned Tweet
My book on the shelf in Barnes and Noble. 😭😭😭
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I gave 4 rides tonight, all of them going to bars or clubs. After the 4th, I logged off, pulled into a parking lot, and sobbed. No one is quarantining. No one is listening. They don't know it yet, but they are killing each other. The sense of hopelessness is overwhelming.
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A passenger will give it to me, and I will give it to her. And someday, I will have to explain to my son why I needed money so badly that I killed his mother.
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I'm a divorced father. Today was my day with my young son. I was brave for him, laughing and playing. I think all the fear caught up to me once I tucked him into bed at his mother's house. She is immune compromised, and I am terrified that without meaning to, I will infect her.
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I'm sorry if this is not the content that you come to this account for, but I am scared and have no one to tell this to.
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I woke up to get a glass of water and found about 12 million notifications. I'm overwhelmed by your kindness. Many of you asked if I had a way to accept donations so I could stay off the road. My Venmo (hastily changed from my real name lol) is @/uber_trips .
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This is something I want to point out for people who use Uber and Lyft that they might not be aware of. Companies offer these behind-the-scenes bonuses to drivers for completing a certain number of rides. It's meant to keep drivers available for passengers, but it's dangerous.
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Anyway, thank you again for listening. It does help to know that others have the same level of worry. If you choose to donate to me, I, my son, and my ex-wife (with whom I stay on good terms) would thank you. Anything helps. Again, my Venmo is @/Uber_Trips
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I started this account because I had so many stories I couldn't remember them all. I thought if I had this to look back on, it would help jog my memory if I ever wanted to write that book everyone says I should write.
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I have a day job where I work in an office. It just isn't enough. I use driving to drum up another $250/week (my goal). Around here, that's usually 15-18 hours/week, always on nights and weekends. It's why I always see the drunk, nightlife crowd and the late workers.
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But how is that *dangerous*, you might ask?
Driver exhaustion.
Let's say you're really burning it up, with each ride taking 20-25 minutes. At that pace, 110 rides would take you 36-45 hours. That's a 40-hour workweek packed into 3 days. It's ~13 hours of driving per day.
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This is part of what's called "gamification" for these apps. They add point systems and goals to keep drivers engaged. Uber even calls them "quests," as if you're going to rescue the princess at the end. The different tiers are there to try to push you to drive more.
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Some thoughts on the coffiespoonie/service animal/disabled passenger controversy that's currently roiling Twitter. Buckle up, because there's a lot of ground to cover and I get paid by the mile.
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In this case, the top bonus is $200 for 110 rides, or an extra $1.82 per ride. These rides have to be completed between 5AM Friday and 5AM Monday. Basically, 110 rides over a 3-day period (Friday to Saturday, Saturday to Sunday, Sunday to Monday).
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In summary, the driver that stranded a disabled person on the side of the road is *clearly* in the wrong by every metric possible. Morally, legally, and professionally, it's wrong. Quit blaming a disabled person for being frustrated at being mistreated.
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This assumes zero idle minutes where you can't find a passenger. Any driver knows that this isn't how it works. Sure, the weekend is busy at night and in the mornings, but it's not busy *all the time*. Your 40+ hours of drive time could include lots of waiting for a ping.
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The federal government limits passenger-carrying drivers to 10 hours of driving/day. Lyft will allow you to drive 12 hours before requiring you to rest.
Some bonuses are not physically possible, but the money gets dangled in front of drivers anyway.
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Carlos is a nurse at a local hospital. He gives me an update on
#coronavirus
in the area, but since I can't verify any of the information, I'm not going to share what he said. He looks very tired, and I refund his ride after I drop him off.
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So in a 72 hour window, you need to drive for 40 hours, sleep for 24 (3 eight-hours windows), and find time to eat, bathe, and do anything else that might pop up.
Can you do it? Sure, and I have. But by the time that final rider gets out of the car, you are *exhausted*.
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All of this is to say that the gig economy is a poorly-regulated system of piecemeal work that exploits vulnerable people. The new underclass gets paid by the ride or per delivery, and the companies tell them it's their own fault if they can't get by.
Just work harder, they say.
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My son has had a low fever (99.5) and a cough for a week. He didn't qualify for testing. We took every precaution we could. My ex has developed a cough and a 102 fever. She is being tested today.
I am gutted.
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The hardest part of transporting a disabled person with a service animal is resisting the urge to pet their dog.
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"I'll tip you on the app."
Let's not build this relationship on lies.
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If the passenger has a disability like a wheelchair, you figure it out. Move your seats around. Rearrange your trunk. You're a professional. Act like it. Someone is depending on you. It's both the legal and morally right thing to do. If you don't like it, go do Door Dash.
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Second, disabled passengers are among the BEST passengers you'll ever have. My city has a high number of blind passengers that use Lyft. They are always awesome. Transportation services for disabled people usually stink, and ride-sharing has been a godsend for these people.
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Third, service animals are highly trained to assist their person. They are not rambunctious little puppies. They're not going to make messes. In 3 years of driving, I've driven many service animals. You know what they do during an Uber ride? Lay on the floorboards. That's it.
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You are told repeatedly, in very clear terms, that you MUST take a rider with a service animal. You cannot request proof that the animal is a service animal. You take them, no questions asked.
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A service animal is not some random pet, and it's not just going for a walk. A service animal is a working animal, and when you see them, they are on the job. That dog is working, not having playtime.
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Besides being super grateful for the ride, disabled passengers can give you a really interesting conversation about a way of living that you'd never know about otherwise. Did you know all the cafes in state offices and rest stops in Florida are operated by blind people?
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Anyone who thinks cleaning messes isn't part of being a driver is naive. People are messy. They track dirt in. They smell bad. They hit their cotton candy vape. They spill an entire bottle of Peach Absolut vodka in the backseat (true story).
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The training even specifically uses the example of a driver with a dog allergy. That's not an excuse. If you're allergic, too bad. You take the passenger. Worried they'll leave fur behind? Tough shit. You take the passenger.
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"Cus' I'm a french fry, chicken sandwich fried guy, might get onion rings guy, might get a milkshake guy. I need freeeeench fries... duh."
*funky beat*
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A dog is no different than any other passenger except that it wants to stick its head out the window. If a little hair on your seats that you can get up in thirty seconds with a lint roller is too much for you, do something else for money.
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First, every Uber/Lyft driver agrees to certain terms of use when signing up and during periodic retraining. These include sexual harassment training, refusing unaccompanied minors, and most important to this discussion, an entire section on passengers with disabilities.
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Fourth, even if a mess is left behind, you should be prepared for messes anyway. People leave messes all the time. I keep a wicker basket in my trunk of cleaning supplies for all occasions. Lint roller, glass cleaner, fabric cleaner, leather cleaner, disinfectant.
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Uber: If you get coronavirus, umm... 🤷🏻♂️ Wash your hands, you filthy contractors.
Lyft: We're going to give away hand sanitiser for your car and there's a fund in case you catch the virus.
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I get into more detail about gamification and the way it manipulates drivers to push themselves to exhaustion in my book Drive: Scraping by in Uber's America, One Ride at a Time. It's out now wherever you buy your books.
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My first cleaning fee was a drunk college girl who *pissed herself* in my backseat. I spent over an hour in a parking lot soaking it up with paper towels before cleaning the fabric. It's part of the job. You knew that going in (or should have).
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Thank you, everyone, for your words of kindness and support. Your donations mean that I can log off for a bit, but people without transportation will still need rides to the grocery store or work through this. Check on your neighbors. Be kind to each other. Help where you can.
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PostScript: Hi everyone, glad you enjoyed the thread. If you want to see more of the interesting humanity I drive around, feel free to follow me. If you enjoy tabletop RPGs, podcasts, and like highly talented improv comedians in a cyberpunk setting, check out
@NeoScum
.
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I got an email a few minutes ago.
The federal government forgave my $88,484.18 in student loans.
I feel like I'm going to pass out.
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Story Time!
Parents weekend is a glorious time for drivers. Parents come to town and need rides, driving up the surge. They go out drinking with their kids, trying to relive their past glories. Parents are also big tippers. They also like to embarrass their kids.
Enter Karen.
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Kelly's friend is very drunk, and she's very excited to go to Whataburger. Bad Guy by Billie Eilish comes on the radio, and she sings along, replacing all the lyrics with ones about french fries and chicken.
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New backseat placard for my car. I'm pretty resigned to catching
#coronavirus
at some point, but until then, I need the money too much to just stop driving.
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Jenny and her girlfriends are going clubbing, and they insist on going around the car to tell me their "ho names." They asked if I'd like one, and how could I turn that down? It's Trenton, by the way, but they say to go by my nickname Trenti.
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I'm humbled and overwhelmed by the kindness and generosity that strangers on the internet would show to me. I will be able to stop driving for the immediate future. On behalf of my son and ex, thank you.
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I'm sorry. I know you're all here for funny stories and ⭐ ratings and all that, but this is my life. It's messy. It's so, so messy. If you read all this, go have a drink. You've earned it. I think I'm going to try to sleep. There's a little boy who needs me in the morning.
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I ended the ride and drove off as Alex and the other girl threw hands in the middle of the street, hoop earrings and heels flying everywhere.
Uber has brought transportation options to people for all sorts of situations, including, apparently, finding that bitch that can't hide.
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Hi everyone, just a heads up. I've gotten several messages that there is someone with a copycat Venmo pretending to be me. My Venmo is @/Uber_Trips. Please note that the account with a second underscore (after Trips) is a scammer. Thank you again for your help.
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Covid test came back negative.
So relieved.
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My ex has tested negative for Covid-19. We found out the other day, and I was too relieved to post about it. She seems to have had some sort of other viral infection. My son was overjoyed to hug her again.
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I'm sorry if this is a bit dramatic. I'm just not having the best day.
It's been a lot lately.
Here's the picture I painted last night. I'm pretty proud of it.
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Arthur is a senior at a gifted school. I switch from NPR to music when he gets in, but he asks me to change it back. I say most people don't like news. "Don't they like to learn," he asks?
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Good evening, everyone. It's Friday night, and that means it's time for the Friday night ride-along! Retweet this thread and join your favorite Uber driver as I explore wilds of Florida's nightlife.
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4 C's to stay safe from COVID. Avoid
- Crowds
- Confined spaces
- Close contact
- Coming to Florida
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Things I do every morning:
- snuggle my girlfriend for at least 10 minutes
- make her coffee just way she likes it
- pack her lunch
- say goodbye like I'll never get to see her again because I lack object permanence
I guess what I'm saying is I really love my girlfriend.
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New dystopian gig horror just dropped.
If I want to be able to see which direction my rider is going or how long the trip is, I have to spend "Uber tokens" to buy that benefit. You earn one Uber coin per ride.
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Sandra cancelled her plans to go to Miami for spring break due to fear of coronavirus in South Florida. Her friend says she is stupid because it's a virus, not a disease. She is still going.
I am mortified.
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Michael and his wife went to a midget wrestling event tonight. They were disappointed that it didn't serve alcohol, so they left to go to a bar. I drop them off and utter the words "I'm sorry the midgets were disappointing" for the first time in human history.
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OMG Y'ALL IT FINALLY HAPPENED. I JUST GOT DONE DROPPING OFF A PAIR OF SWINGERS WHO WERE LEAVING A SWINGERS PARTY. THAT'S ONE OF THE VERY FEW THINGS I HAVEN'T SEEN BEFORE. I FEEL LIKE I JUST SAW A UNICORN.
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The emergency tonight was my son. He's asleep now on an air mattress in the spare bedroom of my apartment.
Until tonight, he lived with his mom. She decided tonight that she couldn't do it anymore.
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The strangest part of having your niche Twitter account go viral is the number of people who suddenly DM you to sell you essential oils or ask if you want to take up FOREX trading.
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Halloween Uber Thread!
Halloween is the most profitable and crazy weekend of the year for Uber drivers. I'm doing passengers instead of deliveries tonight. I'll be posting reviews of Halloween costumes, so retweet and follow this thread for my reactions.
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Spent the morning opening gifts at my ex's house with my son. It means a lot that she wants us to do that together so that he has those memories. I know it's hard for her.
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Vince is going line dancing (which seems foolish right now but whatever). He complains about having to have brunch with his brothers and grandmother on Sunday. His brother just got out of prison, and she wants to see all of them together before he inevitably goes back.
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Stephanie very conspicuously walks behind my car to check the license plate, then sits on the right side in the back seat. She says her dad drives in Tampa, so she does that to be safe and make me feel more comfortable. Much appreciated.
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(CW: Sexual Assault)
I don't just drive people back and forth. If someone is truly in trouble, I'm not going to drop them off and pretend I have no responsibility to them. You can't leave someone in a bad situation.
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I just received this email from Lyft. They are establishing driver task force to provide rides for grocery employees, as well as to transport families to and from food banks and grocery stores.
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(CW: Racism)
I want to tell you a story that I've held back for a long time. I held back because it was so unbelievable that I worried people would think I made it up.
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Jayla and her friends are leaving a drugstore and heading to Walmart. They're looking for hand sanitizer and water. The Walmart is their 4th stop, and everywhere is out. They're scared. We pull up to Walmart and see a man walking out with a case of water. Jayla thanks God.
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You know what I miss? Office cake.
I'm talking about that half sheet cake that appears in the break room for absolutely no reason because someone on the other side of the building wants to get rid of it.
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I picked Roger up from a grocery store. He loads my trunk with bags and chit chats with me about his dog breeding efforts. He currently has 21 salukis at his home. When we arrive, the only dog I see is skin and bones. I screenshot the address. I'll call animal control tomorrow.
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I think he hesitated because it was the only bill left in his wallet. It meant a lot.
It meant I could go home early. It meant a full night's sleep before seeing my son the next day. He handed me 8-10 hours of work. I wish I could have thanked him more, but I was pretty stunned.
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If you've ever wondered what the exact moment someone acquires PTSD looks like, it is the face of a college student realizing her parents are having weird sex in her childhood bedroom.
And Dad is the bottom.
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Story Time!
The most common question that any Uber driver gets in a college town is "has anyone ever thrown up in your car?"
For the first two years that I drove, the answer was no. Until it wasn't. This is that story, and because it happened to me, it had to be weird.
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Good morning to everyone except the people who won't wear masks.
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There will be no Friday night driving thread this week. I'm awaiting the results of a covid test after being exposed. Driving under these circumstances would be irresponsible. Have a great weekend, and please be safe.
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Road story time! Let me tell you about one of my favorite passengers ever. We'll call her Alex.
Alex was on the phone and yelling in Spanish when I picked her up. I could tell she was from Miami from her accent. Alex was FURIOUS. About what? I don't know. I don't speak Spanish.
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Victor is a big guy. He gets in, sits back, and proceeds to sing along with every word of "First of the Month" by Bone Thugs N Harmony. He even had different voices for each section.
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Story Time!
It's pretty rare to get the same person multiple times as a passenger, but let me tell you about the person I've seen more times than anyone else.
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🧵 Thread 🧵
Had a breakthrough moment today with my son at the psychologist's office. After talking to the doctor for an hour, they came out, and the doctor said my son had a question he wanted to ask.
"Dad, do I have an autism?"
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Marco is about 50, leaving a party to go be with his father. I ask how his night was going, and he says that he just found out his mother had died of ALS. He seems lost, and I let him talk out a little bit of his grief. It wasn't unexpected, but that doesn't make it easier
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When people of color talk about their experiences, listen to them. When they cry out for justice, hear them.
"Let justice roll down like waters and righteousness like a mighty stream."
#BlackLivesMatter
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THREAD
The slang the college kids use all the time never stops being amusing to me. It helped to know that if someone told me they were a little skeeted and going to a lit banger with fire hotties, they were high on cocaine and going to a party with lots of beautiful women.
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@KnicksMetsGmen
I don't get it every week, but I do still get offers for quests on Uber. They're usually about $.50-$1 per ride for something north of 50 rides. Just really insulting considering how much work you have to do in such a short time period.
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People keep telling me to write a book about my driving experiences.
This is a pretty good start, right?
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They got out, and Karen pressed a 5 dollar bill into my hand.
"Read those books!" she called to me.
I resolved to do no such thing.
🍷🍷🍷
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I drove to Shell Point Beach yesterday. Sat in my car and looked at the water for half an hour.
Several hundred people on the beach. It looked like any other day. No way I'm going down there.
The news shows us other packed beaches. Florida will be the next New York.
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She pulls on the handle. I roll my window down and tell her I'm not taking her anymore. I end the ride and drive off. As I'm driving away, she's yelling at me in Spanish that I don't understand.
Enjoy that walk home, you racist bitch.
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I really miss gay bar passengers.
There's only one gay bar in Tallahassee, and if you get a ping there on Friday night around midnight, you know exactly who you're getting.
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And no, I don't have to do any of that, but I'd rather be able to look at myself in the mirror than have the money I'd have made if I told myself it wasn't my problem. A clear conscience is worth more than the meagre pay of an Uber ride.
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Before we get going, I want to give a quick how it started/how it's going on my son's room. Thank you to everyone who helped make this possible.
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My son: Wow, you have big teeth!
Me: They're grown-up teeth. You'll have yours soon.
Him: I will?
Me: Yeah. It's kind of funny. You get your grown-up teeth as a kid. It's the first grown-up thing you get.
Him: Instead of dignity?
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In celebration of getting my repaired vehicle back, it's time for another STORY TIME!
This one happened on a Friday night. I rolled up to a house and picked up four college age guys. They came with a case of beer, snacks, a laptop, a projector, and a projector screen.
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FRIDAY NIGHT DRIVING THREAD
Car is gassed, gas station soda is filled. Time to hit the road and see if I can get those 20 rides in one shot. Follow along if you'd like to join me on my "quest" to earn a basic living.
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Gene and his wife don't say a word to me when they get in. They don't even respond when I ask how their day is going. Then they have a long conversation with their hands in the backseat. Suddenly, the silence makes sense.
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I tell Kyle that I hate to do it to him, but the beer can't come with him in the car. He looks me dead in the eye and says "challenge accepted" before stepping out to chug the entire thing and throw it in the bushes.
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My son is feeling fine and appears to have had allergies. He is with me. My ex has had a fever between 102 and 105(!) and shortness of breath. Her test came back "inconclusive" and is being retested.
It's hard to explain to a 5 y/o why he can only talk to Mommy through a window.
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I want you to imagine that every man, woman, and child in your town died last night. Everyone you see in a day, gone. The grocery clerk. The homeless woman on the corner. Imagine empty streets, a city as a tomb.
194,000 people have died. That's the population of Tallahassee, FL.
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