Robert R.
@remnants____
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Single father to my treasured, rotund canine son: Beef.
parody / rp acc. admin: forest
Joined September 2025
( The shimmer of the glass shards brings him—somewhat—back to his senses. His knuckles are bleeding, but that pain's grounding him enough to feel guilty about it. ) ...Shit. I'm sorry. I'll pay for that—and the rest of your tab. ( Fumbling for his wallet. )
ㅤ ㅤ ㅤ what the fuck , robbo *!? ㅤ ( engulfed into a protective blaze , he glared at the pitiful sight . ㅤ jaw clenched , eyeing the forming ichor . ㅤ he sighed——frustrated . ) ㅤ fuckin’ idiot *! ㅤ ㅤ
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Fuck you. ( He's too far gone to care about how this looks, or the consequences. He just wants a fight. Wants to throw fists until his spiraling thoughts dissipate into nonsense. ) ( Drawing back an arm—and then completely missing his target. Instead, he's shattered a glass. )
ㅤ ㅤ ㅤ shit , maybe it is . or perhaps all * my family are miles away . ㅤ ( humoured expression , the liquor ㅤ makes him more easygoing . ㅤ knocking back a shot , there’s little reaction to it . ) ㅤ ㅤ
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Yeah, /really./ Don't you have someone to be with tonight? Unless the 24/7 dickhead shtick is pushing more people away than you thought. ( He's being an asshole—and unfair. Knows he is, too, but the words keep spilling out. He's visibly swaying, trying to instigate. )
ㅤ ㅤ ㅤ ( the slight shuffling is entertaining , ㅤ his smirk became cheshire . ㅤ an intoxicated state from mutual ends , ㅤ however he’s tipsy at best . ㅤ amber eyes flickered towards the other . ) ㅤ hah , * really ? . ㅤ ㅤ
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At least you said you'll try. That's enough for me.
I'll try not to, but it is too funny to keep quiet about..
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( He's through about two more glasses before he notices. Too inebriated to be making any decisions—let alone good ones—he stands and walks over. It's more of a stumble, but he wouldn't admit that. ) Well. I didn't... Didn't think I'd run into anyone I know tonight.
ㅤ ㅤ ㅤ ( silent observations from afar , his eyebrows raised curiously . ㅤ with his own family in herat , holidays are sensitive times . ㅤ drink in hand , chin on palm . ) ㅤ ㅤ
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( He's drinking tonight—maybe a bit excessively. His tab must look outrageous, but he's made sure to go to a bar that wouldn't cut him off. Holidays tend to be rough on him. )
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I mean, I didn't expect you to rip a chunk of flesh out, or anything. It'd be a bit concerning if you did. ( Patting his head. ) This isn't so bad.
oh, it’s not an aggressive bite. i don’t wanna EAT you or anythin’. ( staring at his arm. thin pupils widen. chomp. his teeth are sharp and he knows it. it’s more of a gentle love bite than anything else. ) ( muffled. ) this is all.
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Oh. Didn't expect that. You're moving up in the world—taking accountability. ( Offering his arm. ) Would you feel better if you got it out of your system?
no, i’ll own up to that one.
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Well, look who's lecturing who on self-worth now. The turns have tabled. But—thanks, and...don't worry about it. You didn't do anything wrong. Don't think you could if you tried.
… yer a strong man, robert. as is. i couldn’t even compare before i altered my body. yer strong naturally where i had to change my whole dna to be strong. hope it didn’t sound like i was downplayin’ you any.
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Was that one also the wind?
i wanna bite him a lil’ bit.
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You—oh. You've got a point, then. Sorry. It's been a long week.
i ain’t tryin’ to start stuff this time! m’ not tryin’ to insult yer toughness or anythin’ either!!
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Oh, I'll show you how much damage I can— ...Wait, no. I'm once again refusing to be instigated.
wha, no. dude, i am genetically engineered to take hits. i ensured that myself. yer not some dainty lil’ flower yerself. m’ just sayin’ i can take more damage that you can probably.
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Are you trying to call me fragile? I'll have you know, I've survived two explosions—and only wound up in a coma for one. I'm quite sturdy.
m’ more durable than you are is what i meeeean. i went through brick walls before and shit. a lil’ romp with you of all people wouldn’t hurt me that baaaad.
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Which means I have at least half a point. And we've been over this already. You /should/ care about yourself getting hurt. Don't make me lecture you again—because I totally will.
i don’t caaaare if *i* get hurt. it don’t matter. i wasn’t gonna actually hurt you either. bite you a little affectionately, yeah. can’t say anythin’ about the property damage though. that might have happened.
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A "wrestle" that could involve in one—or both—of us getting hurt. And also property damage. I have enough bruises, anyway. I'd prefer not to add to them.
not a serious fight! i don’t have any ill intentions! just a little romp! a little wrastle!!
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I'm not fighting you, Eros. Up. C'mon, now. I declare that scuttle time's officially over.
i’ll break ya yet. ( he needs his Enrichment(tm). scuttlescuttle. it’s hard to tell just where he plans on pouncing him from with how he’s circling. weird little guy. ) oooh, you wanna fight me, oooh.
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inside me, something seethes.
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"Nearly" is the key word. I refrained—that's a trait of self-control. ...You're going bug-mode again.
you nearly tackled me. it’s not that great of self control! ( dropping down on all fours and hopping around him? tail flicking side to side almost rhythmically. ) c’mon. do it.
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I'm getting the sneaking suspicion that you're trying to instigate me. And it almost worked for you. ( Watching the ears—only a little distracted by them. ) It's too bad that I have excellent self-control.
yeeeah, that’s what i thought. HMF. ( crossing his arms. large ears flap up and down. he’s definitely trying to get him to lunge first. no genuine anger in him. he just likes wrestling. )
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Something tells me corporate won't let me into the office like that. ... So I guess I'll stand down. For now.
yer askin’ for it! i’ll latch onto ya and never let go! you’ll have to carry me everywhere like a baby monkey!!
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