Method of Losing Weight: http://t.co/ufYPuMXeGS

It is turning into a farm around here. Anybody want a chicken? Tomorrow, the cow. When llamas show up I'm out.

Apparently 2 oz peroxide makes a dog throw up erasers & raisins. Don't ask.

I has a follower! Someone is twitting my tweets! Or tweeting my.... whatever it's called. This could be borderline obscene :/

Me:Tell a nice story bout cupcakes & ponys Boy:There was a cupcake & a pony & along came an alligator & ate the cupcake & then ate the pony

wondering if it's possible to overdose on diet pepsi, and if so, what would detox be like?

France. Yes i think if i were to pick a place not to live, it would be france. To much drama. And art.

Who ever came up with "when it rains, it pours"? I mean, duh. <Moli>

Caleb on stray cats: "Watch out Jada, it might have diabetes!"

Need to motivate myself to tidy the house. Or take a shower. SOMETHING needs to be clean!

"Why is there hair in my toothbrush?" "Cause I used it to brush my hair." "WHAT? No you didn't... did you?"

Me:"The state bird of Vermont is the Hermit Thrush" kid:"Hermit crabs fly!" Me:"No, it's a bird called the H..." kid:"I KNOW! Im just sayin"

ok. it's officially like heroin now. i'm addicted.

Is it just me or is a sick 6-year-old the spawn of satan?

unable to understand this technology but it may be the greatest thing since jello shots. or not.