Recently cut my tobacco addiction in half (went from 6mg Zyns to 3mg) and all the positive encouragement I expected to receive hasn't manifested itself.

Waking up after having 3 light beers last night

Was just talking with a guy from Seattle and he goes " yea the weather isn't too bad it rains for 4 hours and then it's fine for 4 hours" umm yea buddy that sounds horrible.

Just cracked open a fresh bottle of ciroc like it's 2013.

Where was @InflamedElk on this call??.

RT @Hughbear54: @natemcgrady It's only there when you're observing the towel. This is what it looks like when no one is looking https://t.c….

Eyeing up the stairmaster speed of the 40 y/o mother next to me to make sure I'm going faster #winner.

There is something about sitting under florescent lighting for 10 hours a day that just makes the office worth it.

I'm convinced dryer sheets are just another scam perpetrated by big laundry.

RT @LolOverruled:

RT @markocantdunk: Archduke Franz Ferdinand in June of 1914:

I bet the funky sock guy at the office doesn't feel to cool on laundry day.