The Emergency Chicken Podcast is out and yes, I’m cohosting. Blogs on the website by Em, endless curiosity and difficult questions from me. A fair bit of laughter too. Please listen and rate 😁
'Rizz' has been chosen by
@OxUniPress
as their Word of the Year, beating other words in the shortlist such as 'Swiftie', 'situationship' and 'prompt'.
Read more 👇
Well the 8 tons of eggshells didn’t help the hostess. I reckon the snails climbed the nearby Solomons Seal and then did a Tarzan swing over. So, for the first time, I’ve potted them up. Bring on the new leaves!
#GardeningTwitter
So,
#gardeningtwitter
, if you buy a plant and the flowers turn out the wrong colour, do you just shrug it off or what? This was supposed to be deep red or blue….
I’ve stayed at this hotel for work several times before, rooms were fine but unremarkable. This time I’ve got a suite with 4 double beds, 3 sofas and 2 large walk in showers. House party anyone?
Just sent my WIP to my agent. what do I do now? Make a cup of tea? Start panicking about how much she'll hate it? A spot of gardening? Any other ideas?
@amy_may
In the biscuit tin? I had a friend whose toddler kept saying ‘bikkik’ when they were turning the house upside down looking for the car keys. You can guess the rest.
@JonnElledge
Train manager today asked me if I wanted a seat when I was squatted up against the luggage rack. Of course I said yes and he made a bloke move his bag. Good to know they're looking out for this.
We paid £1300 to have norovirus together in an air bnb 5 hours drive from home.
Follow me for more tips on how to bring a little romance into your lives.🤢😢
@human_evrice
I did come across something on this - sorry I don’t remember the details. It wasn’t narcissism, it was, an ADHD or spectrum thing, and as you say, it was about trying to connect, to show common ground, establish empathy.
If life is getting you down, you could try giving your head a refreshing dunk in the water while wiggling your bottom in the air. Preferably with a few mates. Seemed to work for these dudes I saw yesterday.
We’ll it’s done. I used loads of gold cones and fruit, most of which seemed buried in the foliage. Ah well, I’ll probably have a tweak every time I come home!
#christmaswreath
I doubt anyone remembers I was concerned that half my old apricot tree had died off when all the leaves fell off one side. Well, it’s all in blossom. Seems there’s life when you think all hope is gone..
I think the time has come to attempt to type up the contents of mum’s tiny diaries - found them after she died. The writing is barely legible in fountain pen - no doubt I’ll be asking for help working it out!
We said goodbye to Fin in the summer at the grand age of 21. He left a legacy of many Xmas pics, so they will be coming you're way... Have a cat in wreath for starters!
#notsorry
#christmas
#CatsOfTwitter
More tips from The Domestic Goddess Dept, this time on how to save calories.
Make a huge tray of mushroom and cheese croissants, put them in the oven and answer your messages. By then, they will have burnt to a crisp and can be added to the compost. You’re welcome 🫤.
@sophielflynn
This is hilarious! Reminds me of when my mum told me she liked a new group called ‘What’s This’. Do you mean ‘Take That’? I asked. Of course she did!
Today’s response to a literary agent passing - though apparently my writing is ‘very lively and instantly engaging’ - was to take a large glass of port to the greenhouse and watch the sun sink over the garden. I’ll find my match.
#amwriting
#amquerying
The doc is baffled by my 8 weeks of laryngitis. Says its not worth referring me to ENT because they have a 1-2 year waiting list, so he has emailed them for advice. Still there's no sign of underlying nasty stuff so that's something. Am a tad fed up.
@Bodysatnav
I’ll help by putting that extra 800k or whatever it is into my pension pot. Can’t seem to lay my hands on the cash. You’ll lend it to me, won’t you? I’m nearly as much fun as Boris.
Apparently if you serve your friend tea from a teapot without a lid, she buys you a new one. What shall I serve next time she comes? Tonic without gin perhaps?
I HAVE NEWS! Today I have signed with Camilla Shestopal at Shestopal Literary Agency and couldn’t be happier. I know only the
#writingcommunity
will understand what this means… the rest of you will have to take my word for it that getting the right agent is a Big Deal!
Every year I think my fritillary has died because it’s always 60 million years later that everyone else’s. No sign at all this year… then I found this little darling a couple of metres away!
#gardening
#GardeningTwitter
I have no idea how my apricot tree survives - it’s nowt but an offshoot of a damaged trunk - but so far so good this year. Lots of blossom to come. 😃
#GardeningTwitter
Couldn’t resist knocking up a quick wreath just with the beautiful leaves from my smoke bush. I’m hoping they’ll hang on until I get round to an Xmas one!
Home at last. This is my lovely mince pie plate. OH offered to buy it for me, thinking the tag said 3.99. Turned out it was 23.99 at the checkout. It was my birthday so he couldn’t exactly change his mind!! 😁
#Christmas
#mincepies
My wellies just leaked for the first time. Reader, I have had them since I was a teenager. In better news, at least I managed to make a little posy for a friend
#snowdrops
#GardeningTwitter
Ok, I’ll tell you. In a couple of months I’ll live 100 metres from a CHEESECAKE SHOP. I never knew such things existed! And I’ll have to see them every time I use the post office. Aargh!!!
Saints alive! Our village Post Office is changing hands. The new owners have to keep the PO open, and have a small shop they can do what they want with. I wouldn’t have guessed in a month of Sundays. Have a guess? I’ll tell you if you’re warm…
I know my remarkable ability to lose secateurs is just stupidity. I still have no idea how we lost the Xmas Swede, but it was outside so maybe a fox ate it. But HOW have we lost a chopping board? I mean, it never leaves the kitchen, does it?