Mat George
@matchu_chutrain
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Following
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Media
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Statuses
28,735
🏳️🌈 𝑺𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒏𝒚 𝑲𝒊𝒏𝒈 🏳️🌈 Cohost of @sheratesdogspod | Med School Student Runner Up 🩺 | Venmo: matchu_chutrain | he/him
Los Angeles, CA
Joined July 2011
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Pinned Tweet
For 5 dollars I will come st*b your boyfriend to make sure he’s not a cake
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Half of us are gonna come out of this quarantine as amazing cooks and the other half is gonna come out with a drinking problem. There is no in between
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My tinder match just roasted the fuck out of me as an opener and I’m kinda into it
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I’ve been in LA for a year and haven’t seen a single celebrity. My mom comes for a weekend and meets Snoop Dogg
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Me texting my friends when I’m on a first date
Going welI, I think! Thank you to all. LOVE!!!
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My favorite memory in high school was when I fell in love with this girl but I was mean to her and then one day at a football game she was like “waiting for you is like waiting for rain in this drought. Useless and disappointing” and then it started raining and we kissed
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I'm laughing so hard at the amount of breaks the dude in this video took
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My coming out story: I texted the family group chat that I’m gay while I was blacked out, got ignored by everyone and then watched as every single person responded when my sister sent a picture of the enchiladas she made 4 hours later
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Dudes be like I’m sorry if you misread the 9 months of us talking and me telling you that you’re perfect for me as me wanting to date you
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If I walked into my significant others room and our faces were on the comforter I would call the police
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Three months ago I was crying every single day when I drove home from work because I was so unhappy with my life.
I’m still doing that but now I get to listen to Christmas music simultaneously
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My ex texted me “hey ugly” and I got butterflies
What’s wrong with me
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To the couples who got engaged yesterday and took the attention away from Jesus’ birthday... have fun in hell
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Imagine being inside of Michael’s and seeing a grown man do this
Fun times at Michael’s
Trump
Is
Still
Your
President
🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸
God bless President Trump and God bless America.
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He’s not ignoring you he just recently bought separate shampoo and conditioner and is trying to figure out which one goes in his hair first
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I give every guy I date a 3 red flag rule.
The rule is if I find three or more red flags then I become colorblind for the remainder of our toxic relationship
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Let this be a lesson for men everywhere
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Inside of you there are two boulders. One small one and one large one the size of a small one
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It’s crazy how 6 months ago blacking out alone in your house was a sign of alcoholism but now it’s just a normal Tuesday
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One time in high school I was having an allergic reaction to peanut butter so I asked to go to the nurses offices and my teacher told me to just wait because class was over in 15 minutes.
I said ok because I’d rather go into anaphylactic shock than be confrontational
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NORMALIZE SEDATING BABIES ON PLANES
NORMALIZE SEDATING BABIES ON PLANES
NORMALIZE SEDATING BABIES ON PLANES
NORMALIZE SEDATING BABIES ON PLANES
NORMALIZE SEDATING BABIES ON PLANES
NORMALIZE SEDATING BABIES ON PLANES
NORMALIZE SEDATING BABIES ON PLANES
NORMALIZE SEDATING BA
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Girls talking in the bathroom after one of them threw a drink in her ex boyfriends face
No Lindsey, it was a sign of strength that some people just don’t understand!
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I had 24 years to come up with a hobby. I didn’t and now I’m shit outta luck
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Claudia Conway was FIFTEEN when she told the whole world her mom had Covid via Tik Tok
Miley was SIXTEEN when she released The Climb.
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All I ask is that if you’re going to murder me you do it in a way that will get me on a popular podcast
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My stomach when I was 5:
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Instead of asking your boyfriends if you look fat just ask your grandparents.
They’ll tell you the truth without any hesitation
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My dad has never been this proud of me in my entire life
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Stop yelling at me for having multiple boyfriends. God didn’t have one disciple. He had 12
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One time when I was 17 I was talking to this 30 year old and I gave him my address because he wanted to see how far we were from each other. 30 minutes later he texted me to look outside and when I did he was in his 2009 Toyota Crayola driving by and waving
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Kim, sweetie, I’m begging you please hire someone else to photoshop your photos
This family pic was such a challenge because Chicago was so scared of Dino! LOL We tried to explain and show her that it was just daddy but she didn’t get the concept yet! So shout out to the photographer for editing her in & making our family Flinstones dreams come true!
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Me and my friends when we all end up unemployed because our bosses found our twitters
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normally don’t like to out people but there’s a 50% chance I saw this dude on Grindr
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I need to lose 30 pounds in 3 days can I get some tips please
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If this gets 1000 likes I’ll bring my cat to Arizona and my roommate can’t be mad because this had 1000 likes so I had to
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I’m confused how people who live in places where it’s always gloomy outside get their happiness??? From within??? Could not be me
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When I gave up my dads dream of me being a basketball star to perform in the school musical alongside my girlfriend Gabriella
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*Lorde sitting at a red light*
I'm waiting for it
𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭
I̶͈̼͑ ̷̩͚̄͠W̶̙̦̓̄A̵̙̒Ǹ̶̰͊͜T̶͓͌ ̷͈̉I̴̺͚̍̊T̶̞͗ ̸̜͓̐
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Someone left this at my apartment. What could they POSSIBLY be eating with this tiny of a spoon???
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Day 3 of quarantine: me getting into a fight with my coworkers
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My ex used to tell me I was a worthless piece of garbage every single day.
My new man only says it 1-2 times a week and that, ladies, is what I call progress
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The 74 year old
lady getting
airlifted off the The pilot
mountain
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I swear to god if I’m ever eating alone at 60 years old and some twerp comes and sits with me cuz they think I look lonely I’ll beat the living crap out of them
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I saw someone quote tweet this and say “s/o to god”
This had nothing to do with god this was all because of The Naked Philanthropist Girl
Rain pours in Sydney, Australia, giving residents hope as the region grapples with devastating bushfires.
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All I want is a quesadilla and a crumb of serotonin. Is that too much to ask for?
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Thought I saw a hickey on my neck and began to panic until I remembered it’s been months since I’ve been physically touched by another human being
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Oh my god they’re leaving the royal family
👨🏻🦰👩🏽
💂🏻♂️💂🏻♂️💂🏻♂️💂🏻♂️💂🏻♂️💂🏻♂️💂🏻♂️
💂🏻♂️ 💂🏻♂️
💂🏻♂️ 👩🏻🧔🏻👸🏼👴🏻 💂🏻♂️
💂🏻♂️ 💂🏻♂️
💂🏻♂️💂🏻♂️💂🏻♂️💂🏻♂️💂🏻♂️💂🏻♂️💂🏻♂️
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I cannot believe my boyfriend cheated on me with my best friend. That’s strike one buddy. Two more instances like that and you’re gonna get a warning
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One time in middle school I brought home what I thought was a Willy Wonka golden ticket and laid it on my dresser. My mom later busted my door down while I was showering and screamed at me asking why I had a magnum condom in my room
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“Don’t touch the butt”
Nemo:
👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿
👉🏿👇🏾👇🏾👇🏾👇🏾👇🏾👇🏾👇🏾👇🏾👇🏾👈🏿
👉🏿👉🏾👇🏽👇🏽👇🏽👇🏽👇🏽👇🏽👇🏽👈🏾👈🏿
👉🏿👉🏾👉🏽👇🏼👇🏼👇🏼👇🏼👇🏼👈🏽👈🏾👈🏿
👉🏿👉🏾👉🏽👉🏼👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻👈🏼👈🏽👈🏾👈🏿
👉🏿👉🏾 👉🏽 🚤 👈🏽👈🏾👈🏿
👉🏿👉🏾👉🏽👉🏼👆🏻👆🏻👆🏻👈🏼👈🏽👈🏾👈🏿
👉🏿👉🏾👉🏽👆🏼👆🏼👆🏼👆🏼👆🏼👈🏽👈🏾👈🏿
👉🏿👉🏾👆🏽👆🏽👆🏽👆🏽👆🏽👆🏽👆🏽👈🏾👈🏿
👉🏿👆🏾👆🏾👆🏾👆🏾👆🏾👆🏾👆🏾👆🏾👆🏾👈🏿
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Can now cross “almost ruining my best friends proposal” off my bucket list
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I need to make it clear that they didn’t ignore me because I’m gay they ignored me because I’m annoying
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I don’t know who needs to hear this but don’t cut your hair in the middle of a depressive episode
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Saw an article that said the Colorado governor would look into the death of Elijah McClain because millions of people signed a petition which is nice but imagine how much nicer it would be if it didn’t take millions of signatures to look into the death of an innocent black man
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“YOU CAN GIVE DOUBLE LIKES ON TWIT-“ literally shut the fuck up
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Blood Banks: PLEASE DONATE BLOOD PEOPLE ARE LITERALLY DYING BECAUSE WE DONT HAVE ENOUGH
Me: hi
Blood Banks: not you, homo
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It’s the weekend and you know what that means!!
Nothing. It means nothing and nothing matters anymore
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People told me to send a nude in our group chat so I did and now it’s dead silent. I’m in so much pain
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Why are conservatives so insistent on calling Covid-19 the Chinese virus? It’s not even like it saves them time typing it out I think they may just be racists??? Thoughts???
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Not me getting a text that my Uber has arrived in a red Honda while I’m in a grey Prius 4 minutes into the ride
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I don’t know who needs to hear this but maybe don’t text “Merry Christmas” to the dude who treated you like shit this year
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Me seeing y’all get sad over boys with dirty fingernails
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"If you're in America you should speak English"
I didn't see you speaking Spanish when you were blacked out at 1 PM in Mexico, Becky
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I feel like I missed my opportunity to find someone to date so now I have to wait until the first wave of divorce hits
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Can someone with E. coli please spit in my mouth IMMEDIATELY
@matchu_chutrain
I got e.coli poisoning once and lost 17 pounds in 4 days so you could try that
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The best part of the diner was that one day the guitar fell off the wall and under it was a quote that said “don’t let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game.”
I still get goosebumps when I think about that diner
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I cannot believe these are real messages I got last night lmfaooo
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Dating someone who isn’t twice your age and willing to buy you flights and expensive dinners? In this economy?
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My absolute favorite part of this day was when my dad saw me about to leave in the middle of the game and was like “you’re giving up on your dreams” and then I was like “no dad I’m giving up on yours” and ran to kiss her. I didn’t even like football my true passion was poetry
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Also her parents were dead and she had a mean step mom and step sisters and worked at a diner
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And I know they weren’t asleep because it was like 11 am
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📍men
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📍apologizing |
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📍figuring out a way to blame it on something/someone else
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Apparently Coronavirus likes to live in beards so please say a prayer for all of my ex girlfriends
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Can everyone stop saying it’s not Snoop Dogg. My mom’s gonna be heartbroken the next time she logs onto Twitter
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