🏴☠️Maddox🏴☠️
@maddoxrules
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New York Times Bestselling author. Thought Leader. Philanthropist. Genius. Latest book AVAILABLE NOW IG:
Joined May 2011
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#LCDLF4
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Renzo
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Costello
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Romeh
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#WWERaw
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SAROCHA REBECCA ON RED CARPET
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Maripily
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Lupillo
• 50217 Tweets
FELIX ENAMORA A BARCELONA
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BLINDAJE FURIOSO
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STRAY KIDS HITS HOT100
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Scarlett Johansson
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MADAME FIGARO X GULF
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定額減税
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Kingdom Hearts
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梅雨入り
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Birds Nurturing
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給与明細
• 14249 Tweets
#Canucks
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Gunther
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金額明記
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Amber Rose
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Lyra
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#ゴンチャの新作
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Keys For Healthy Life
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Otis
• 10003 Tweets
Pinned Tweet
I was fired from Twitter this morning because during a code review, I had a procedure called "upDo.g" and when Elon asked me "what's upDo.g?" I said "nothing much, what's up with you." He walked away and then my badge stopped working & security escorted me out of the building.
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It's still crazy to me that the first thing everyone does when they buy a new phone is get a protective case for it, so we never see its body during its entire life, and we just accept it as fact rather than a design flaw.
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Having to add some stupid bullshit like this to an expensive product just so you can hold it is a sign of a design flaw.
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Thanks everyone for all the support! I emailed him to say that I was on an H1B visa and begged him to sponsor me. He said fine and told me to send him the visa form. For the country I listed Fomunda. He asked me if I meant Bermuda and I said Fomunda DEEZ NUTS! I'm being deported
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Wait a second. George Floyd didn't have a completely flawless past? He's had run-ins with the law before? Oh well fuck me, I guess it's totally okay to crush his neck for 9 minutes without due process. Everybody stop protesting please, Glenn Beck & Candace Owens said it's okay.
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Lots of people are using Photoshop's new AI generation to expand classic paintings like the Mona Lisa, but the true test is to crop it smaller, then expand it to areas where we already know what it looks like to see how accurately it re-generates it. Here's my test. Nailed it!
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President of Tripwire, the studio that brought you Killing Floor, Killing Floor 2 and Killing Floor: Incursion, feels it's important to let you know he's pro-life.
Proud of
#USSupremeCourt
affirming the Texas law banning abortion for babies with a heartbeat. As an entertainer I don’t get political often. Yet with so many vocal peers on the other side of this issue, I felt it was important to go on the record as a pro-life game developer.
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@CryptoKaleo
Or the merchandise stolen is insignificant to the company's bottom line, all of it has tracking software, and the cost of liability if one of their employees or customers gets hurt in the process would be astronomical compared to the cost of stolen goods
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As predicted, people unanimously think that Excellent > Great > Very Good. So it's mind-boggling that
@Photoshop
changed the exporter settings from an intuitive 0-100% to this bizarre, child-like ranking of quality that ranks "Great" as being better than "Excellent."
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@Gooey_Ghoblini
So why wouldn't they just build the frame a little thicker so we don't have to buy a case for it?
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Ha ha! Now do Stephen Hawking! Guy couldn't even walk. Some scientist! What a fucking idiot!
Who looks healthier?
RFK Jr is 69 years old.
Dr. Hotez is 65 years old
Makes you think…
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@erikfinman
No apps will be banned? Enjoy the malware, genius.
Also the first amendment extends to freedom of religion, which is incompatible with your dipshit leader's "complete and total ban on Muslims entering the United States."
Is the phone water proof from crocodile tears?
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@elonmusk
Yeah, except that's not what happened. She gave specific examples with context.
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Everyone please take a moment to congratulate ABC News President,
@jamesgoldston
for doing a bang-up job.
http://t.co/JmoigmQZwX
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Footage from the Vegas shooting already has language beeped out. Thank God I can continue to watch this mass shooting without being offended
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I see
#GoWokeGoBroke
trending again. Time for a quick inventory:
WOKE BRANDS THAT HAVE GONE BROKE:
-Gillette Razors
-NFL
-Disney
-Oreos
-Google
NON-WOKE:
-Scott Adams: Flourishing
-Roseanne Barr: Flourishing
-Gina Carano: Flourishing
-MyPillow: Flourishing
-Newsmax: Flourishing
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-A high school student collapsed and died suddenly during a game in Arizona
-A 24 y/o soccer player collapsed and died on field
-An 18 y/o died playing football in Wisconsin
-Another student died suddenly after collapsing on field in Florida
What do they all have in common? 🧵
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The dick riding is reaching levels previously unforeseen.
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Here's a graph of home prices overlaid on a birth rate chart. Probably nothing.
"The U.S. birth rate has fallen by 20% since 2007. This decline cannot be explained by demographic, economic, or policy changes."
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Lot of "thE cAsE prOtECts mY pHoNE" comments in this thread. If I can figure out how to make an egg not crack when thrown off a roof in a cardboard box in grade school, cell phone engineers should figure out how to make my $1,000 phone not disintegrate when it slides off my lap.
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@erikfinman
Oh no! Forget being booted from a platform, the free speech guy doesn't even want me on his thread.
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As CEO of Twitter, I would ban these people. Zero tolerance for whatever this is
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You guys... I did it. I finally purchased WinRAR. For real. A mere 4096 days after the trial period. I've been using this software for years, and it just works. I complain about software that doesn't all the time, so why not support software that does? Thank you
@WinRAR_RARLAB
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@JasonSCampbell
Using this logic, a wage of $0.00 isn't a non-living wage, because you could argue that homeless people and literal slaves who made no money still lived, therefore $0 is a livable wage.
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@maddiebckley
John Malkovich in Being John Malkovich. He played a very believable John Malkovich and seemed perfect for the role
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Guys, give Twitter a break. What large-scale social media company could handle 150,000 simultaneous users watching a live stream? Okay fine, other than Twitch? Other than YouTube? Other than Facebook? Other than Instagram? Other than TikTok? Other than...
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My doctor tells me I need to cut cholesterol, but how can I be sure unless I've heard from leading pro-cholesterol politicians having a debate moderated by an ex-reality show host who made people eat bugs for cash on TV?
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Twitter & Reddit doing its best Digg impersonation in 2023.
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LAPD & Chief Moore getting lit up on this live Zoom call.
"...in conclusion, you're dumb as shit."
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Hey guys, alpha male here. I don't believe in the gender spectrum. What I do believe in is alpha males, which is a male who exhibits more masculine traits than beta males who exhibit more effeminate traits. Masculinity is definitely not a spectrum, & anyone who thinks so is beta!
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All were young. And ALL of these incidents happened BEFORE 2020. Long before any covid vaccine, long before covid itself.
In order:
-Charles Youvella, AZ - 2013
-Gregory Mertens, Belgium - 2015
-Ronald Rouse, WS - 2012
-Jacquez Welch, FL - 2019
They all
#DiedSuddendly
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His last tweet was a show of sportsmanship.
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The t-rex jumping Easter egg game when you don't have an internet connection is the Dark Souls of Chrome-based Easter egg no-internet games.
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Stalking people and posting their flight information is creepy and invasive.
Anyway here's Hunter Biden's cock.
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People always scoff when they see places like Twitter and Meta offering employees unlimited food, wine on tap, coffee bars and endless snacks as "perks." They think it's wasteful and exorbitant, but there's one thing most people aren't taking into consideration...
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It took Harambe months to achieve the staleness that
#covfefe
achieved in less than 24-hours.
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@MelissaBlasius
@abc15
"The hunger strike may continue," sources say, "if his peanut butter and jelly sandwiches don't have the crust removed." Jacob Chansley, the big boy who stormed the Capitol in his favorite helmet and jammies to do an insurrection, has been in detention since Friday.
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@Jessssuhh
Wouldn't it be great if they made the phones sturdier by default and we still had the option to customize them with our own style with special thin decals? We could call them "stickers"
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@justin_hart
@realDonaldTrump
WhY wOuLdn'T tHe canDidAte wHo tOlD prOplE nOt tO vOTe bY maiL NoT gEt AnY mAIL vOtEs???
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Yo
@h3h3productions
, they're talking about your tweet to
@TeamYouTube
. The tweet was displayed in chronological order.
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"Blocking people is pointless! Freedom of speech baby! Except for outgoing links to Substack. And NY Times. And Threads. And searches for Matt Taibbi. And outgoing social media links. And my flight information--yours is okay though. And people parodying me. And journalists And.."
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Buffalo Bills player Damar Hamlin collapsed suddenly on field. Anti-vaxxers and opportunists are rushing to push their agenda before any facts are known, and ignoring the facts that we do know: young, healthy people died suddenly for inexplicable reasons long before covid.
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HOLY SHIT! A racist cop who sent me hate mail in 2003, Rian Alden, formerly of Oregon State PD, had an excessive force case re-opened after they came across his hate mail on my website! 1/3
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Found this making the rounds on Twitter and Facebook, so I might as well post it myself. Here are my thoughts:
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There's literally a place called "hell" he sends people he's canceled.
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LIFE HACK: Add ground beef to vegetarian chili to make it good.
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All joking aside, losing Twitter is really going to hurt a lot of people. People who've spent years cultivating an audience here, who've come to rely on them to sell their art, only to lose it all overnight because a billionaire wanted to have some epic lulz. Let that sink in.
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Don't want to get vaccinated? That's your choice. But you should pay more for health insurance if you don't. Your cost should reflect the added burden your decision is placing on the healthcare system. It's simple.
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Let's see if it can fix the ruined Jesus fresco...
That's a "no."
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Hey guys, new CEO of Twitter here! Who wants free speech?
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I did it. I ruined two memes. This is the nexus where they meet.
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Pornhub should ban IP addresses from states that banned abortion. Incest porn will take a hit, but we have to make sacrifices.
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Steps you can take to become less insufferable online:
1. Count the number of trans people you know in real life
2. Reduce the number of opinions you have about trans issues to that number
You could still be insufferable, but these steps could help. Follow for more!
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If you design a video game with a waterfall in it, and you don't put a hidden cave or treasure behind it, fuck off.
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A story in 3 parts.
Wear a mask. Quit listening to dipshit conspiracy theorists with shitty medical advice.
#HermanCain
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Rather than waiting for facts to come out, people are pushing half-baked, idiotic theories and pushing bullshit documentaries. Want to follow the money? Don't forget to include the conspiracy theorists who are profiting off it by building their brand and selling you products.
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The anti-vaxxers have scraped enough mud from their brow to use Twitter, and this site seems overwhelmed with anti-vaxxer bullshit. Every other tweet is about "1600 sudden deaths" (false), ivermectin (ineffective) and some global conspiracy involving Bill Gates
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Losing a top engineer or innovator at your company to a competitor could cost your company tens of billions of dollars. These perks seem exorbitant because they are. Top companies want to keep their top employees happy to discourage them from leaving. The cost...
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People who say Friends didn't age well are idiots. It's exactly as good today as the day it came out: a pile of dog shit. It's the vapid, unfunny sitcom equivalent of sad masturbation. Every character is simultaneously unlikeable and punchworthy. It's aged just fine.
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There should be a Baskin Robins but for gravy. You get a scoop of mashed potato product (russet, yukon, sweet, purple yam, white sweet, etc), then a bunch of different gravies to try: turkey, beef, pork, chicken, Thai fish, curry, etc. Toppings: bacon, cranberries, almonds, etc.
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Remember when a conspiracy theorist intentionally derailed a train and tried to crash it into a Navy boat? That happened 2 months ago and was barely in the news cycle for 24 hours.
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You can be anti-abortion, or you can be angry that parents take their kids to drag shows. You can't be angry at both. You don't get to force people to have kids, then force them to raise them in a way you approve of. You don't want freedom, you want to control.
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Wow, I can't believe 30+ federal judges, 50 state electors, the Supreme Court and 80 million voters decided on a conspiracy to give Biden the election. So much for democracy!
#notmypresident
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This is the perfect Joe Rogan clip.
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Wow, gotta say I wasn't expecting a
@Photoshop
update so quickly after my tweet earlier today, but I have to give them props for making changes to the exporter settings so quickly based on user feedback. These new granularity settings are much more precise. Thank you
@Adobe
!
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Trump supporters are sensitive people. We should build a safe-space for them:
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The path to wealth? Fraud. Theft. Lying. Manipulation. Anyone who finds inspiration in this man is soft.
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Woopsie! Cops were looking for a stolen motorcycle. They stopped a car instead. Simple mistake! Hey, at least they put those hardened 12 year old in handcuffs, face down on hot asphalt. Why are they crying? Nobody got killed this time! Jeeze, why are people protesting?
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The shadow government can orchestrate large-scale psyops, recruit people to get fake tattoos and kill themselves all as part of a conspiracy, but there's one thing they can't stop: PODCASTS!
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If my net worth was $218 billion dollars, I probably wouldn't be stealing jokes from Hard Drive, getting dunked on, delete the original tweet, insult the person I stole from, and then get ratio'd again. But this is just speculation
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@MattWalshBlog
Ah yes, Sacha's famous ditty, "Throw the Jew Down the well" was about Sacha goofing on himself, and not about exposing how quickly and easily dipshits will sing a tune of literal antisemitism in public when it's seen as safe or popular.
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Conspiracy dipshits are, bar none, the dumbest people on social media. Literally anything happens
Conspiracy dipshit: SOMETHING DOESN'T ADD UP. PSY-OPS! SHADOW GOBERNMNT! FALSE FLAG!
The submarine imploded. End of story.
Shut👏the👏fuck👏up.👏
Thank you in advance!
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Wow, gotta say I wasn't expecting a
@Photoshop
update so quickly after my tweet earlier today, but I have to give them props for making changes to the exporter settings so quickly based on user feedback. These new granularity settings are much more precise. Thank you
@Adobe
!
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Want more women in science? Maybe you should care less about what people are wearing, and more about science.
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Here's another test with Grant Wood's "American Gothic." Slightly better on one of these...
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The YouTube bell is giving users a choice to get all or "occasional" notifications, which is what the subscription button used to do. I think this is a great idea, and YouTube should add more icons and subscription choices to suit everyone's needs.
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I think it's important to note that no matter what your political beliefs are, we are all tired of hearing about them.
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