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lindizzleox

@lindizzleox

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embarrassing.

Joined March 2011
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@lindizzleox
lindizzleox
7 months
I feel like a fraud when I go to whole foods
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@lindizzleox
lindizzleox
10 months
“You wish me a merry pissmus, you wish me a merry pissmus”
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@lindizzleox
lindizzleox
1 year
I’m in literal tears reading this
@DeepShane6
Shane of hugs
1 year
@TheGlobal_Index @StreetFightsHQ it's an amazing technique that can disarm just about any dude. I was fighting two dudes and one had me in a headlock (maybe trying to choke me poor technique), the other had my left arm on the ground, so i shoved my hand up his shorts and put my finger in his ass, at least one
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@lindizzleox
lindizzleox
1 year
I asked Vinny which sink he wanted to wash his hands at after coming in from playing outside. He boldly yelled “I don’t have to mom. I’m going to watch something. Don’t fight with me.” …He’s not even three.
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@lindizzleox
lindizzleox
1 year
But what is there that a Bloody Mary can’t cure ?
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@lindizzleox
lindizzleox
1 year
I forwarded a medical bill email to my husband. And then immediately got an email back “thank you for your payment” - like wow you’re annoying sometimes but you’re honestly the best.
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@lindizzleox
lindizzleox
1 year
My feed is all about how dangerous seed oils are…. And my baby’s formula is made up of corn syrup and seed oils lol WHAT IS GOING ON HERE
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@lindizzleox
lindizzleox
1 year
It’s so weird to realize I’m a grown ass woman
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@lindizzleox
lindizzleox
1 year
After experimenting twice, I’m here to say there is no “good time of year” to have a newborn baby.
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@lindizzleox
lindizzleox
1 year
“How many times do I have to tell you, you cannot growl with food in your mouth”
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@lindizzleox
lindizzleox
1 year
Vinny’s pronunciation of Christmas is “pissmus”
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@lindizzleox
lindizzleox
1 year
THESE TARGETED ADS ARE GETTING ME.
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@lindizzleox
lindizzleox
1 year
I keep getting sucked in to online ads while feeding the baby in the middle of the night.
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@lindizzleox
lindizzleox
1 year
Late night dipping a loaf of bread into the roast gravy. 🤤
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@lindizzleox
lindizzleox
1 year
It’s been 7 weeks and I’m still smiling over the fact that I’m no longer pregnant.
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@lindizzleox
lindizzleox
1 year
I had a serious conversation in person with a man today whom I couldn’t see because I was holding my toddler who was giggling while pulling my hair and putting it over my face.
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@lindizzleox
lindizzleox
1 year
Now that I’ve “accepted” sleep is no longer part of my imminent future, I need recommendations on how to feel awake without sleep.
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@lindizzleox
lindizzleox
1 year
“I could stare at a tree for an hour and examine every single bit of its bark, and that’d be a really fucking good day for me.” - my husband
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@lindizzleox
lindizzleox
1 year
There’s chocolate on my pillowcase & I’ve known about it for 2 days and haven’t done anything about it.
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@lindizzleox
lindizzleox
1 year
I forgot to take a picture of my kid on his first day of preschool. I also didn’t buy one of those signs.
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