szn 4//BENIN PERFUME PLUG
@kirainsync
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💸 sign. Medical student offline. Fragrance & Heels vendor online. Feminist everywhere.
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Joined June 2020
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Pinned Tweet
Saturdays are for shopping heels for all your events.
1:🏷️47,000
2:🏷️27,000
3:🏷️30,500
📍: Lagos.
Please RT if this comes across your TL.
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Your dad: 🇳🇬
Your mom: 🇳🇬
Your bio:🇯🇲🇺🇸
Why?
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@gidiproperties_
I was interested in buying the house until she sat on the bed. They don't use to sleep on my matrimonial bed in my family. Bye.
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@TMZ
Kate didn't get an invite also. Only immediate family was allowed to see her. What's wrong with you people??
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Two men walked into a bar. The first man ordered H2O. The second man says ''that sounds good,I'll have some H2O too''
The second man died.
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@cuppymusic
It hurts me when y'all Nigerians living abroad take this Independence thing seriously.
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If this pops up on your tl, you're now my friend. Now say hi mf
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Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?
Because they lactose 😭
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@naimaalee
@JabiLakeMallNig
I fully support you because one time I wanted to pray in a plane and I couldn't because they didn't make provision for a prayer ground. Like who does that??? Prayer grounds lives matter✊
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Q: Where can hormones be found?
A: England!
Don't block me 😂😭
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Man. This page brings us closer to the scriptures... It's awesome!
Love wey dey totori, love wey no get expiry date 😍
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I look better without my glasses. But I need my glasses to look better.
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Why is it called 'friends with benefits' and not 'cumrade' ??
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Can I sing like Beyonce? No way.
Can I rap like Nicki Minaj? Nope.
Will I hold concerts? Yes.
Where tho? In my fucking bathroom.
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People who say 'brazier' instead of 'bra' are hoodlums and you can't tell me otherwise 💀
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Today, I got into a fight with a guy named 1. He then called his friends 3,5,7 and 9 for back up.
The odds were against me 😭
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Fun fact: Bikers never travel bikers. They travel by bikes.
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Today I was about to hit my brother for frying the last eggs at home. But I just decided omelette slide this time.
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Guys I broke up with my boyfriend because I found out he was Japanese. I should have known though, there were red flags everywhere. 😔
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What kind of music do mummies listen to??
Wrap
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A chemist froze himself at -273°C, everyone thought he was crazy but he was Actually 0k.
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Teacher: What comes after 'A'?
Simi: 'B'
Teacher: So why do you write 'G Baby?'
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*Me at a hotel*
Me : I want a room.
Hotel Receptionist: There's no room available.
Me: My name is improvement.
Hotel Receptionist: So what?
Me: There's always room for improvement.
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So I got really bored last night and started looking at my mutuals' headers.
Turns out two of you have the same boyfriend 😭
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'But you called me daddy. I thought you wanted to have kids'
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Nobody:
Group 8 elements when other elements try to relate with them:
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Me as a lawyer: my Lord, here are the screenshots
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Me as a Cardiologist:
This your heart don break o
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I am pleased to announce to everyone that I am now off the market...and I'm in a bus, heading home.
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What do you call a mean acid?
A-mean-o-acid.
😂😂😂
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Those guys who go around carrying Bluetooth speakers, blasting music have the highest level of confidence. You can't tell me otherwise.
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One time I asked someone to choke me ( just to know the feeling o) and my dears, for two minutes I could see myself standing before God, waiting for judgment😭
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It is just so sad that my vampire jokes will never see the light of day...and that sucks.
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@Cecilia_Bamusii
She’s an icon.
They were expecting her at 43 to look miserable but were shook to the bone.
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Can we normalize arguing with little kids? They're so rude
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If the number '666' is considered as evil. Does that mean 25.806 is the root of evil?
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So this my gamer friend has his X-BOX stolen. He got really sad and I tried making a joke but it wasn't enough to CONSOLE him.
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Man...this thread!!😂😂
Quote this tweet with an ss of a tweet that lives rent-free in your head🙏
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My boyfriend is a vegan and a transgender.
.
.
.
.
He was a herbefore.
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Back in elementary school, two kids named Cleus and Ron were competing for the post of class prefect. Another kid, named Atom was called to talk about Cleus and Ron. He said he nucleus and also neutron, but would not electron because he was full of negativity.
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I remember when I cried so hard when my friend's boyfriend was making moves on me while they were still together. I felt so bad cuz she was head over heels for him and he was moving mad. That boy contributed to my trust issues today and may God punish him.
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What's the best thing about getting a house as a gift?
You can live in the present
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Brother : Hey sis, wanna make out with me?
Sister : Well, if you incest.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes??
No idea
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Random fact: The opposite of assassin is dickdickout.
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Stuck between saving my money for the future and spending all my money on food so I can live to see the future 🙂
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Anyone interested in a random questions thread?
Air me not🥺
(Quoted Replies only)
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This year is almost over and I don't still have a picture with a mask on. How will my children believe me?
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Girls get into a fight and start sharing all the secrets they kept between themselves. Sigh.
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What do French people call a sad weekday?
A Trajeudi.
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@BBNaija
Lucy: Nengi! Why haven't you cleaned?
Nengi : ehm.. Ma, I was talking with O-
Lucy: Go and kneel down there. No lunch for you
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Are you in touch with anyone from your secondary school?
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lol🎂
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How cool would it be if after you died you could see the top 5 times you almost died?
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@ThatPHCBoy
My dream was to be a sailor. But I was told no man will marry me , I won’t have a happy life and blah blah. I was too young to stand my ground so I decided to be a doctor. I hate that they do this to us.
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When you unplug the things that beep at the hospital and everyone starts sleeping better:
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Everything was okay until the past, present and future walked in. Then it became tense.
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Me flirting: Hey babe. Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
Satan: Get out!
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I just think the pain that comes with period is very much unnecessary. Like why should I lose blood and also feel like I'm losing my life??
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Why are paediatricians always in a hurry?
Because they have little patients.
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Twitter: Type password
Me: password
Twitter: Your password is incorrect
Me: incorrect
Twitter: Try again
Me: again
Twitter:
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Omo I was away for a few days and over 1k people unfollowed me😭 whuttt
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As the days go by, I remember all the people I've lost along the way and maybe being a Tour Guide isn't the best career for me 😔
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This shoe vendor should just take things Yeezy and do knotting even if this whole saga socks and he is sole crushed. May God heel him sha.
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I was hit by a truck going at a high frequency. It hertz badly 😭😭
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God I have a date on Saturday. And if this man pulls up with SMAN id card, I am going to faint. 😭
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Trying to make a good tree pun but I'm stumped and think I need to take a leaf. I'll be bark soon.
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Guys! I finally found the whole story😂😭. A THREAD
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