literally

anyway, that’s over, my live tweeting feat draws to a close. it’s been a pleasure ladies and gents, ill report back next year when ill be just as single as this year, still avoidantly attached but again ready to judge other people willing to be vulnerable on live TV! #MAFSUK

anyway they should have to do what the crime documentaries do and tell us what all the contestants are doing now and who they’re with. don’t they know im a nosey bitch?! ive got to wait for them all to decide to post on instagram now 🙄 #MAFSUK

end of the show like “so now that’s over, if anyone else would like to apply for us at channel 4 to thoroughly humiliate on national television and match you up with someone you’ll absolutely fucking hate, head to the website!” #MAFSUK

the end of that programme being an advert for applications for future series after that colossal shit show we’ve endured for weeks????? i’d rather apply for hunted and spend 6 weeks hiding in a bin that belongs to a morgue. ta for the offer though #MAFSUK

also, i fuckin hate when folk do the most horrific stuff to someone or say the most out of pocket things and then after the damage has been done they say things like “im being honest now” or “im owning up to it now” like it makes them mother bastard theresa #MAFSUK

nelly and maeve being possibly the two most emotionally vulnerable women on the programme and being paired with the two most cowardly, borderline (and explicitly) abusive men on the programme feels crazy to acknowledge #MAFSUK

christ, steven is fully coming for pinocchio’s whole brand here. in fact i think i can even hear disneys lawyers scrambling to draft a lawsuit as we speak #MAFSUK

“im a liar, ive proven im a liar, ive even lied about lies ive lied about; but im telling the truth now! promise!” #MAFSUK

how much are we believing steven’s new apologetic and humble pie personality? #MAFSUK

the amount of disrespect nelly tolerated is honestly both admirable and idiotic all at the same time #MAFSUK

i need whatever dean’s on that repels away the feelings of being cringe or being embarrassed cause the guy has got more front than brighton #MAFSUK

donning a fake tattoo to get someone who doesn’t fancy you to fancy you is honestly really sad #MAFSUK

why’s mel doing this delicate voice and understanding nods towards julia-ruth after everything she’s inflicted on multiple cast members when she’s just laid into paul like he slaughtered a litter of puppies? #MAFSUK

YESSSSS PAUL CALL OUT THE FAKE SHIT #MAFSUK

“their husbands” are TWO DIFFERENT men. YOU are the common denominator babe, that’s why the anger is also aimed towards you. like?????? #MAFSUK

it’ll never not piss me off that julia-ruth asked divarni his biggest fear and was then pissed off that he gave a “deep” answer. what was she expecting him to say???? clowns???? #MAFSUK

like, i understand some onus is on paul and he has said sorry for wasting her time, but surely to god as the “EXPERTS” you should know what questions to ask to ensure that someone coming on a marriage show is ready for marriage? #MAFSUK

it’s like mel’s on the “expert” panel purely to just stir the pot by defending the women and absolutely rinsing the men #MAFSUK

the way the experts are choosing who comes up to the couch is giving when teachers used to favour the grade A* students and reprimand the grade C/D students and the rest of the class were just lucky if the teacher learnt their name #MAFSUK