If you ask me the monster mash is great for year-round listening

Me and the homies are staring into death and being still tonight

Does anyone know what time Geese is on in London on September 8, 2023?

You’re so yacht rock (derogatory) I’m so yacht rock (non derogatory)

Tomald Cruise

https://t.co/klp0QdOckY

Quasars out tonight

Making food is so dumb It’s too cold to eat So you cook it and it’s too hot So now it’s got to get colder again? Fucking ridiculous

My priorities aren’t straight (cause they’re gay)

People’s names are so stupid. I really have to be called Justin for the rest of my life?

I went to the handsome good boy rave last night and nobody in attendance knew of your existence

God forbid a white boy forbid God

I’m driving my car down to Geneva baby

Ladies and gentlemen a new worst Tame Impala album just dropped

Why is it that you always start to get sick on a Friday then you’re sick all weekend and just fine by Monday at 9AM

My brother texts every two weeks for a Hallas update and I am thrilled to be able to provide one on this lovely October afternoon

Don’t you hate it when you’re in the bathroom at work singing Elton John’s hit song I think I’m going to kill myself and then you realize you’re not alone so you have to leave quickly before people recognize your shoes so you don’t wash your hands

My roommate heard we were watching a movie with a cast of entirely women and decided to go to sleep early

What is more effective 100 hours of therapy or 100 beer

The airport is the most depressing place

The raddest, shortest story of all time: “Skateboard for sale, used a TON”