Jon Jones
@jonjones
Followers
20,334
Following
3,470
Media
5,093
Statuses
29,611
He/him. #gamedev art outsourcing and production at Firaxis, author (How I Escaped Evangelical Hell), ramen enjoyer, cat hugger, name haver.
Seattle
Joined July 2007
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Last Seen Profiles
FUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKK
Jon Jones Tests Positive for Steroids after UFC 214, Title Stripped
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I'm worried that we're giving our cats unrealistic expectations of physical beauty.
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welp, either my tweet about cats barfing on my bare feet went super viral, or
@Jonnybones
done fucked his life up again.
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This week I've been called a cheater, liar, doper, a disgrace to the black community, wished I got Ebola and shit myself to death, every type of physical and many types of sexual violence wished upon me, and one person hoped I lost my *soul*.
So I guess Bones is fighting, yeah?
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wait, hold up -- hummingbird nests can have a little leaf as a roof? this changes everything
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Rarely captured on video, what we are witnessing here is how Scandinavians are born
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late night stoat trampoline practice. little stoat is making excellent progress on her gymnastics routine
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well here's the thing
Do you think you could defeat in physical combat the most famous person who shares your first name, and who is that person
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I don't know how it keeps happening! I take an Ambien for sleep, and next thing I know, I'm wake up doing 70mph through a neighborhood with an AR-15 in my lap. Am I Jason Bourne, or drunk on Zima?! I don't know!
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Just ordered two bottles of El Recuerdo De Oaxaca Mezcal for... reasons.
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@kenklippenstein
My dad was an Evangelical zealot that got Alzheimers as I became a teenager, and it's astonishing and tragic what kind of insane brain rot they have, but -- most tragically and worrying -- how far family members will go to convince others that the person is functioning as normal.
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Social media has, on the whole, made me less interested in what anyone thinks about anything.
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Tyson Fury thinks he can win a fight against Jon Jones? UFC Jon Jones? Our Jon Jones? Or is there another JJ, maybe he works at fedex? That would make more sense.
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I'm devastated that I've disappointed you and your 0 followers, Daddy_Sexyy. Out of everyone else's opinion, yours was the one that meant the most to me. I must retreat to my quarters at once to contemplate my shortcomings, in hopes that I shall one day earn your respect anew.
@jonjones
You piece of shit steroid user how many more times are you going to pop for steroids?? Corrupt piece of shit you and the UFC
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For those watching, I've been getting
@Jonnybones
' hate mail for 5+ years. I save the best here:
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this is the greatest thing that's ever happened to me on Twitter.
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Yeah, there's not enough injectable horse testosterone in the entire world to make me competitive for that fight by March 4. I might stay in that night.
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When I signed up on Twitter, I never imagined I'd be kept relentlessly up-to-date on the blood, urine, and penis pill details of a stranger.
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You could read my bio. I'm a published author, worked in games for 17+ years on over 50 titles, and I'm a frequent speaker at game industry conferences where I'm internationally regarded as an authority on art outsourcing and production. That was good enough for Twitter, anyway.
@jonjones
getting his 15 minutes of twitter fame because of
@JonnyBones
Never understood how that developer got the blue check mark.
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I can't believe I never thought to open DMs before. This is already paying off.
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this is possibly the most honest and wholesome relationship I have in my life. I’d hate to ruin it by accepting his DM request
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This is so perfectly stupid. It gets funnier the longer I look at it.
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Technically he’s not wrong. I don’t see myself main eventing anything soon.
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@kenklippenstein
People will go far outside their comfort zones and rationalize horrible, unforgivable things on the basis of "I knew this person before their brain turned to absolute fucking pudding and they'd NEVER do this" while that person absolutely totally does that exact horrible thing
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I have a theory.
Why isn’t a
@jonjones
vs
@francis_ngannou
fight already signed and sealed
@danawhite
@ufc
I mean if Jon Jones really wants this fight, I’m sure Francis Ngannou would love the chance to be the first man to beat and possibly knock out Jon Jones. What gives?
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Oh, he blocked me again. Once again, no idea why. What a weird dude.
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lol
"Brendan [Schaub] is looking forward to setting up a pre-taped multi-camera 45-minute in-person interview with you on 'Food Truck Diaries'[...] regarding your well-known career as a professional MMA champion fighter"
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I've gotten over 1000 notifications in the last five minutes and I can see my phone's battery draining. I'll be back shortly to reply to all
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Qasim is a wonderful follow. I'm grateful for his patience and willingness to explain and demonstrate life as an American Muslim. Also fascinating is the history and context of Islam which he provides freely and in response even to very rude people. Tough gig these days. :)
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tiny flying teddy bear chilling with a ladybug pacifier and getting a wing bath
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geez, this doofus gets DWIs like he's filling out a punch card and the 8th one's free
UFC champion Jon Jones arrested for aggravated DWI, negligent use of firearm in Albuquerque (
@DamonMartin
)
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So I'm supposed to give up my own account with my own name and donate it to a millionaire sports celebrity simply because you're too dumb to send hate mail to the right person?
@jonjones
@JonnyBones
You should give up that Twitter handle so they real Jon Jones can have it. Then there wouldn't be this confusion.
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When I die, please commemorate me on buses in precisely this way.
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I'm a lot rougher in DMs because people have to fail several intelligence tests in a row to accidentally send me a Direct Message. I think I really upset this guy, but he really asked for it.
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*Jon takes a long, hard swig of tequila straight from the bottle* welp
BREAKING NEWS: Jon Jones drug test nets 'atypical finding,' UFC 232 moved to Los Angeles on one week's notice
#UFC232
#JonesGustafsson2
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FUCK YOU PAPER CHAMP
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Just finished my first BJJ class. Wow, that absolutely kicked my ass. It's humbling as hell being a real big guy clearly about to die on the mat, but everyone was incredibly supportive and welcoming. I did my best, faltered but didn't give up, and I had fun. I'll be coming back.
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ESPN is failing because I’m not sucking enough dicks?
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I finally broke down and cried my heart out at being laid off. It's taken two days but I'm finally letting it all out. It's okay to cry. It's a pressure release valve. Don't let toxic masculinity deprive you of a useful outlet all humans can use.
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@jules_su
@JonnyBones
No way! Why should I change my name? He's the one who sucks.
(also, I already registered
@bestjonjones
, just in case...)
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I've been at the keyboard for 4 straight hours and the mistweets keep coming.
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Jon Jones was arrested early Friday morning by the Las Vegas Metro PD, a police spokesperson told ESPN. Jones is being charged with battery domestic violence and injuring and tampering with a vehicle. More info coming to
@espn
.
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the internet is telling me something about a fight with Gus. I'm ready.
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@JonnyBones
omg I'm offline on a plane for two hours and I come back to this!!
What's up, Bones! :)
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After getting
@Jonnybones
' hatetweets for years,
@betweenpictures
and I made a PSA about mistaken Twitter identity:
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Hey, Twitter. Depression and grief are really kicking my ass lately and I could use something uplifting. Can you show me cute pictures of your pets? That always lifts my spirits.
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I actually got mocked by a guy for tweeting about my sick cat in the hospital, saying it's not manly. At first I was pissed, but then I realized that I'm fine knowing he'll never have the capacity experience the pleasure of a pet that loves you back. Enjoy greyscale life, bitch!
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My awesome wife is a nurse at a NYC hospital treating COVID-19 patients. Last week, she caught it. As of today, she's finally improving. It's been a terrifying few days, but I'm relieved that the worst is finally behind her. Stay safe, stay home, wash your hands, wear a mask.
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I wouldn't say I got beat so much as I didn't show up.
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I'm sorry I threw out my arm, man. I didn't think through the full consequences of getting a Fleshlight sponsorship. I guess that's why they told me to open the packages after the fight.
@jonjones
You are softer than cotton candy dude... a real fighter would still show up with that injury and compete
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Real talk: I'm grateful for the silly Bones name confusion thing because I've legit met a ton of fascinating new people I'd never imagined happening for me. I've met so many cool people and made terrific friends out of it. Thank you all for having me. I'm so happy to know you.
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I'm well-aware that I'm am embarrassment to MMA fighters around the world. To be fair, I've never been sanctioned to fight, or a champ.
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I'm a video game developer. If they drug tested us, you wouldn't have video games.
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that's one of the hardest wikipedia bio photos I've ever seen
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Listen to doctors, not this fucking uneducated moron.
Cases 👏🏻 don’t 👏🏻 matter 👏🏻 only deaths. Figure it the f*ck out or hide in your house while everyone else is back to normal. EDUCATE yourselves and look at the trend of declining deaths. 7000 people die in American every day NOT from corona. There was 600 deaths due to corona
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I've been getting Bones' hate mail since 2012 -- but it took until THIS EXACT MOMENT TONIGHT that someone accidentally sent me [quality] nudes instead of poorly written hate mail. Best of all, it was a lady! Finally, years of soaking up endless psychic abuse finally pays off.
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Thanks, but my lawyer has advised me not to take any more legal advice from Colby Covington stan accounts.
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