There is no greater person in this world than a slightly tipsy middle-aged woman at an airport bar

Last time we got Trump ---> shitty Eminem album This time we got shitty Eminem album ---> Trump Idk what to make of this, but Marshall, for the love of god, either put out good shit or just hang em up

I'm lucky that all I have to feel is shame. I have friends and family that are afraid for their lives and their loved ones'. I fear for them, I love them, and I stand with them. They don't deserve this.

Because the country believes he offers change. Even if it's a con, the country is so hungry for something new that it will accept violent, racist, misogynistic, anti-science fascism. If Democrats were serious about defeating that, they would have gone left. Instead...well. This.

It's the status quo. Democrats refuse to align with the progressive left. Why? Because it's a threat to establishment Democrats, who are deluded enough to believe that they are what the country wants. The country voted in, for a second time, a snake oil selling fascist.

Democrats have a fucking problem. If the candidate of the future isn't an intelligent, experienced, charismatic woman of color, then who is it supposed to be? The entire Democratic party is based around the status quo with a twist of diversity. The diversity isn't the problem.

99.99% of the time: "Michigan has water? The Great Whats?" One day every four years: "THE FATE OF THE COUNTRY RESTS IN MICHIGAN'S HANDS"

As someone who turns the lights off whenever he leaves a room, I respect countries trying to save a few bucks on daylight

Monster Mash is somehow both

Putting together a Halloween party playlist and really trying to walk that line between fun/funny Halloween tunes and music you would hear at a human sacrifice

It should be illegal for attractive people to be in relationships

*Tigers go on insane run to compete for Wild Card spot and secure series win against Royals to win their 4th series in a row* Everyone: BOBBY WITT JR IS UNBELIEVABLE

Donate your body to science and no one bats an eye But as soon as you drop a corpse at the MoMA's doorstep, all of a sudden you're a "suspect" of a "homicide"

I don't understand why people like Hozier, and at this point I'm too afraid to ask

The Oasis reunion has me remembering the important things in life Pulp and Blur are really fucking good

I'm tired of pretending that camo isn't cool as hell

Distinguished gentleman fine dining

Adam Silver looks like trust fund Nosferatu

Oof, right in the suspension of disbelief

It kinda sucks reading a spectacular book, just because you know the one you read immediately after will almost certainly be unable to measure up