if u already have all those . ohohohohohho just wait to see what i got cookin in the ol noggin babey

you can get upgraded to a double nipple piercing if you’ve already been circumsized 🔥🔥🔥💯💯💯😤😤🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩

next man that talks to me wins a free involuntary adult circumcision 🔥🔥💯💯💯

“you know what mulch gang is . it’s like mulch like mulch yanno and also like pibbles and arson like mulch gang yanno .” - me realizing maybe my brain IS rotted

we needed government funded transportation for old people because these bitches should NOT be driving holy fuck their brain works at like 1/3 of the speed of everyone elses bruh its unsafe

i be falling asleep so easily anytime anywhere Except For at night in my bed 😭😭🫠

today i learned its “beck and call” not “becking call”

imcrying

there is no way we’re not living in the satirical- “fuck it” timeline . like my brain literally cant process what’s happened this year .

how do you explain to anyone from the past that in 2024 an impeached felon gets elected president . like . i .

LITERALLY EVERY TIME??????? MAKE IT STOP

Not a job in America should be asking for a background check …..

imagine trying to explain to someone in the early 2000s that in 20 years donald trump would be president, then become a convicted felon, then be president AGAIN AFTERWARDS . what in the fuckin shit

NO WAY AT THE DEBUTANTE BALL S1 OF GOSSIP GIRL THEYRE DANCING TO THE PRETTY LITTLE LIARS THEME???? OMFGGGG

dancing and singing along at a concert and the person next to me looking at me like I’m Insane . what tf are you here for bitch??? literally . go feral or go home

just started Gossip Girl and the music is fucking FIRE in this show top tier fr

the slow mo is CRAAAAAZY

“that’s a baby” is sending me

you should stop eating cashews because the fruit that its harvested from burns ppl and the main workers of cashew farms in 3rd world countries are children children are getting disfigured for your cashews

https://t.co/YoNkR24z2K