izzie
@izziejree
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serena van der woodsen impersonator
nyc
Joined January 2011
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Pinned Tweet
billy costigan showing up to his first therapy session in the departed
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19 million people in nyc and a guy i fucked just walked into the room during my interview!!!!!!!!!!
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some men will say sydney sweeney some men will say the former mayor of chicago
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new update just checked snap memories turns out we fucked exactly 2 years ago to the day!!! wish the universe would set me up this hard with a guy i actually liked!!
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to top it off my phone died immediately after, managed to not get lost going home, but did have to sit with my thoughts on the matter for 45 minutes
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overheard this guy chit chatting with his friends about the trauma he experienced when a girl said he looked like james corden and then an hour later introduced myself and said he reminded me of james corden
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head empty no thoughts just vodka and a lemonade chaser
i fear i drank directly out of a titos bottle at a house party ln like i was 18 and not almost 28
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so uhhhh everyone meet new puppy please send me cute boy dog names so i don’t end up naming him chappaquiddick
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ok now that i have sewn this vest and my adhd meds have worn off time to snuggle my dog in bed n watch playoff hockey
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i started betting on sports yesterday and i already understand why men throw shit at their tvs when their team loses
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bf broke up with me so i could experience fearless (taylor’s version) as a heartbroken teenager and adult. so sweet!
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28th bday present to meeeee i can’t wait for her to be delivered (in july 😪)
couch i’ve been eyeing for 3 years is 60% off i fear i will be purchasing sorry to my credit score
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she’s stunning
i literally took these pics then 30 mins later cut this up and made something else HAHA
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the bi girl in me is way more attracted to trevor lawrence than the straight girl in me
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@lobstadelic
also chicago's windy city nickname came from politicians being "full of wind" not the actual wind speed (although it is p windy)
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me vs. my on repeat
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what if we kissed at the o’hare international airport cannabis amnesty box
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at a bar and i guy i used to fuck just walked in on a date :-) nyc is so big and yet i can’t stop running into people i’ve fucked
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my roommate is at her bfs house to break up with him rn i’m sooo excited for her. single girl fall again!!!!
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boss said “u didnt send this weekly report email” and i got to hit him with the “here it is from 11am and you were cc’d” email ✨💖🤙🏻🤠💗
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if my friend doesnt scream cry and throw up at dinner im dropping this
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i miss boston (i miss wearing yoga pants and sneakers to the bar to drink for 10 hours straight)
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ive learned a lot driving in ny this week. mostly that no one knows what a 4 way stop is.
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i really was born with the "i can do that" gene because the table i bought is too tall and i'm on amazon looking at saws
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key word is *might* cause it’s still sitting in my room unfinished but i did cast on and complete a cardigan in the meantime :-)
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there are an astounding amount of people who have ZERO street smarts. i was taken on public transit fresh out the womb and taking it by myself by 5th grade. i promise it’s really not that dangerous out there
$38.00 to park in a Center City lot today for under 3 hours. I wish Public trans was clean and safe.
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they’re perfect for each other because what the fuck is he wearing
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someone call taylor swift and tell her i can direct her next music video
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why is everyone is new york obsessed with calling ever bar a dive bar. if they have $25 cocktails and opened with brand new everything in the last year its not a dive babes 🫢
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u can wrong me but i can root against ur favorite sports teams for the rest of my life
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he doesn’t know im on the phone scheduling an appointment to get his balls cut off
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gave 2 girls a better table last night so they offered me 8 free laser hair removal sessions. potential to be the best tip ever
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u can take the girl out of boston but u cant take the puckslut out of the girl
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made chicken pot pie soup it says it serves 10 but im going to eat the whole pot actually
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yeah she’s slaying
1am on pinterest staring at this pic long enough that i think i figured out how to make it
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pinned a photo of a bitch in an outdoor shower 4 years ago and am finally having my moment
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normal people save every single ticket and scrap of paper from everything they’ve ever done right
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slayed these steaks w a reverse sear!!! && topped them with stanley tucci’s chimichurri
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a guy called me a skinny cunt today and the best revenge is knowing he was blacklisted from ever working for my company within 1/2 an hour
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ring light mirror at the air bnb i am going to be so insufferable this whole weekend
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3 years ago i sat in a chicago restaurant with my mom and told her i should move to chicago and work there. just signed an offer letter to work for their restaurant group. dreams do cone true!!
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mommy getting her chip for being 29 (!!!) years sober today im so proud
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my neighbor is actually???? psychotic ???? when u wonder what ur upstairs neighbor is doing to make all that noise it’s THIS apparently
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going to a new therapist is so funny they’re like have u ever wanted to k*ll urself or anyone else? haha babe strap in we have sm to discuss
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just had my highest sales week so far at my job i hate being a slave to corporate america but i’ve wanted this job since i was 20 and i finally have it and i’m amazing at it
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guys will literally kiss their sons on the lips instead of going to therapy
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just got home to new sweater vest i found on ebay in my mailbox she is so gorg
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my friend just suggested red bull vodkas as a joke but i fear my eyes lit up a little too bright
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credit card: maxed out
checking account: empty
my brain: get a tattoo
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